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Cars & Trucks Expert
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Aug 18, 2009, 03:06 PM
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Why I can't stay depressed
Men are just happier people than women. Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Whereas a wedding dress costs $3500, tux rental costs only $95. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes don't cut, blister or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $3.99 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier than women! ;)
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Uber Member
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Aug 18, 2009, 03:45 PM
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Why women have it better
... outlive their husbands nagging them to death
.. have PMS as an excuse
... don't pull a back muscle screaming at the television during a sports event.
... claim 30 indefinitely
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Ultra Member
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Aug 18, 2009, 11:01 PM
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Hehe, LOVE that last answer N0help, but I thought everyone was 28? (;))
Hehe, but weren't these taken form another post here? I thought I just read them here a little while ago... :confused:
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Ultra Member
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Aug 18, 2009, 11:04 PM
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Haha. My cousin has been turning 29 for about 4 or 5 years now...
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Pest Control Expert
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Aug 19, 2009, 02:31 AM
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Justcurious, your cousin waited too long. I stopped counting at 22 so it'd be legal everywhere. (Of course, my 22nd was eligible to vote for Reagan)
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Aug 19, 2009, 02:56 AM
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We can get the dog to do what we want the first time we tell them
Comfort food is a beer and a bowl of chili
Or anything we can pile cheese on
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Ultra Member
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Aug 19, 2009, 10:19 AM
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Hahaha
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Ultra Member
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Aug 20, 2009, 08:02 AM
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Nice. Gave me a good laugh.
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