Hi. I have just received my A level results (qualifications that lead to university for those non-UK people out there) and they were not what I had expected. I got BBC bit needed to get AAB to secure my place to do Optometry at Cardiff University. I am going to retake my A levels to get the right grades but I'm now unsure if Optometry is what I am meant to be doing with my life. And if it isn't then what is it I am suppose to do? Know one can answer that question for me, but I am so confused. I'm thinking of perhaps dentistry or medicine but am I really clever enough? Never really knew what I have wanted to do with my life but I do know that I want to do a vocational course which leads to a job at the end of it. But I also want to enjoy it. I Just don't know what to do. Some wise helpful words would be nice. I've spoken to my parents other members of my family, career advisers and teachers from my school. Doing so hasn't made me decide though. I'm hoping someone out there may just say the right things to me so please answer my question and help me with my life!

;) You obviously know that no one can make this decision for you but yourself. That is a good start. However, there are some basic places to start. I can tell that you have the intelligence to go into some kind of medical field. Which one for you is the question.

Before we choose the specific medical field, ask yourself a couple of quick questions.
1) If you were told today that you had 3 months to live and money was not a deterrent, what would you do with these last 3 months?

2) If you won the lottery or a game and the prize was 25 million dollars (about 11.5 million pounds) what would you do with the money? How would you live your life from now on.

3) Which medical field grosses you out. In other words, would you get grossed out if you were a proctologist or gynecologist? Or could you handle that?

4) Which medical field could you not do? Medical examiner, looking at corpses all day? Abortion doctor? These are necessary fields, could you personally do them though?

5) Once you have it narrowed down to what you don't like or could not do, then look at the leftovers.

6) List the leftovers and write down what you would really enjoy about each position. Write down what you would not enjoy about each position. You can even add a scale of sorts 1 to 3. 1 for hate, 2 for neither, 3 for love (or something like that).

7) Consider what you will be doing when you are 40, 50, and 60 years of age. Can you do this medical career that long, at that age, with possible physical limitations?

8) Look at the cost of schools, which ones can you afford now?

9) Look at the location of schools, can you study and be far from family and friends?

10) Can you parlay this medical career into a side-line of sorts... By maybe teaching when you are older?

Let me know if you have any other questions or need help with direction.
Good Luck,
Ken Konet
[email protected]

I wanted to reply in a separate message:

When you answer questions 1 and 2, it will show you what is important in your life. What it is that is near and dear to you.

With question #1, you are finding out who and what is the most important. Because you will no longer be around it is important to spend the limited time doing things that are most important to you.

With question #2, you are discovering your altruism, your ability to give to others or yourself.

I studied at Oxford in 1995 and I loved it there! Good luck with your choices.

I have always made good grades in school and always had the opportunity of having a good JOB. I have an undergrad degree in Mathematics and a Graduate degree in Business and hate going to my J.O.B. (Jumping Out of Bed & Just Over Broke) to the point that it brings me to tears often. I have read numerous books and articles on how to find your "passion" and I haven't found it yet. I feel like a little mouse in an endless maze. I get the cheese they move the cheese I find the cheese. I wish there was bread I find the bread and wish there was more and find lobster.

My question is and what I feel in your post is how can I get lobster (the really big prize) without having to run around like I am crazy doing a lot of work. Don't answer with the work smart instead of hard because that approach still has me working and that word needs to leave my vocabulary.

I learned a new word the other day SINECURE: paid position with very little responsibility. Does this type of thing really exist and how can I obtain a lot of them so that I don't have to do much but still get paid?? I like to do my own thing totally and unfortunately I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth. I wish to travel the world... gotta go to that J.O.B. so that I can afford the ticket but get so frustrated when I save enough and then can't afford to go because I don't have the vacation time! What about my time!!

If anyone has wisdom on this please feel free to answer...

Hi Justwannaberich.

You really sound like me. I am so clueless and lost about what I am doing with my life... that it is not even funny anymore. Well, I had been good in acads and am currently in a phd program at the verge of writing my proposal. Yet, right now, I am getting into, "I couldn't care less" attitude day by day. The worst part is, it feels sick even when you are in a bar drinking "having good time" with friends. At the risk of sounding like a looooooser, I don't feel like doing anything useful.

I tried the philosophical approach, reading.. soul searching to find where my passion lies but to no avail. My parents say its not that easy... (btw I am only 24... and even that feels OLD to me right now), yet everyone around seems to know what they are doing. Now, grass is greaner on the other side.. as they say... So, is everybody just doing things for the sake of doing it? I don't know. However, the answer to that question is the solution.

The Solution- Might be just as the oldies say, "Keep trying and you will find it". But then, your point of "working smart" as opposed to 'working hard' makes me think.

Well anyway, I just wanted to vent out my feelings. I hope this discussion catches pace.

Neel.

:confused:

I am a first year mbbs (bachelor in medicine and surgery) student, in lahore, pakistan. Today the head of the physiology dept. told me that I need to lose weight.
HAHAHAHAHA.
Its just another tally to add to the 'why I don't want to do medicine' column of my growing list.
But my problem is that I really don't know what else there is for me to do.. I never really 'let' myself be passionate about anything because I knew all along that this is what my mother (who has AMAZING emotional-blackmailing powers.. ask her for lessons people) wants me to do..
I know that even after attaining this degree, I will want to go into psychiatry.. therefore I don't see why I'm going through all this trouble to do these extra 5 years when I could just get a pysch degree and not be called fat while doing it.
I'm only 18.. im going to be 19 in a week..
Most people really want to be where I am now, I know kids who have come all the way to this ****ty little country of mine to do medicine, and here I am, IN MEDICAL SCHOOL, being ungrateful about it..
I don't know what I want to do with my life.
I'm applying abroad this year.. trying to see if I have any other options..
I have never been so confused/perplexed in my entire little life. I don't want to regret dropping out of med school when I'm job-less 10 years down the road, but I also don't want to become a doctor and never practice..
Any advice?
Anyone?

Hi... :eek:

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http://n.domaindlx.com/jsilangit

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Regards,
J Silangit

Hi everyone, I'm new to your forum, but I've also been actively trying to figure out what I want in my life. Here's something I found that might be useful... I also find that if I keep trying to know myself better each day, I will find my answer soon enough :) all knots can be untied if you work at it ;)

INSTRUCTIONS:
STEP 1

Answer all seven questions. And, answer them
Honestly. Do not let past mistakes or
Disappointments prevent you from filling in
The answers. The past is the past. You cannot
Change it, so your best bet is to move forward.

STEP 2

Once completed, ask yourself whether you are
Ready to make the changes necessary to reach
Your goals. There is nothing you cannot
Accomplish once you commit to it. Sure, it may
Seem hard at times, but aren't you worth it?


PLEASE COMPLETE THE FOLLOWING:

1. What Are Your Dreams?

If money, time, and past mistakes were not an issue,
Where would you be today? In this section include
What you have always wanted in your life without
Worrying about how it will turn out.

1)
2)
3)

2. What Are Your Accomplishments?

List three or more things that you are most proud of.
Remember, even the little things count.

1)
2)
3)

3. What Are Your Goals?

We all have goals, but they cannot all be accomplished
Today. (And, it does not matter how big or small they are.)
Use this section to break down your dreams into goals you
Want immediately, and then those that can wait.

a) Immediate Goals (next 90 days)

1)
2)
3)

b) Short Term Goals (90 days to 1 year)

1)
2)
3)

c) Medium Term Goals (1 year to 3 years)

1)
2)
3)

d) Long Term Goals (3 years +)

1)
2)
3)

4. What Steps Will You Take Tomorrow?

All goals are reached one step at a time.
Which 3 steps will you take first?

1)
2)
3)

5. Why Will You Succeed?

You are an amazing person dedicated to being the best
You can be or you would not be filling out this
Worksheet. List 3 reasons you will succeed
And use this section as a reminder when doubt
Comes into your mind.

1)
2)
3)

6. What Obstacles Will Get In Your Way?

You might as well get them out so they do not end
Up stopping you again. Once you are aware of the
Reasons and excuses why your goals will not work,
You can move past them.

1)
2)
3)

7. What's The Reward?

How will you reward yourself for the short-term
Successes along the way? It does not matter how fast
You reach your goals. You are on the right track to
Reaching them!

1)
2)
3)

PLEASE COMPLETE THE FOLLOWING:

1. What Are Your Dreams?

If money, time, and past mistakes were not an issue,
Where would you be today? In this section include
What you have always wanted in your life without
Worrying about how it will turn out.

1) Journalist
2) Doctor
3) Travelling throughout the world

2. What Are Your Accomplishments?

List three or more things that you are most proud of.
Remember, even the little things count.

1) travelled on my own and started new life by myself
2) have great friends
3) speak many languages

3. What Are Your Goals?

We all have goals, but they cannot all be accomplished
Today. (And, it does not matter how big or small they are.)
Use this section to break down your dreams into goals you
Want immediately, and then those that can wait.

A) Immediate Goals (next 90 days)

1) understand what I want
2) start applying for the right jobs
3) communicate I will leave my current one

B) Short Term Goals (90 days to 1 year)

1) find a new job
2) find a boyfriend
3) grow in my career

C) Medium Term Goals (1 year to 3 years)

1) reach a significant career growth
2) settle wherever I moved
3) have a boyfriend

D) Long Term Goals (3 years +)

1) be with someone I love (not much I can do about this one)
2) be a manager
3) see if MBA is needed or future studies?

4. What Steps Will You Take Tomorrow?

All goals are reached one step at a time.
Which 3 steps will you take first?

1) search online for job opportunities
2) send emails and meet with advisers
3) be nicer to my closest and myself

5. Why Will You Succeed?

You are an amazing person dedicated to being the best
You can be or you would not be filling out this
Worksheet. List 3 reasons you will succeed
And use this section as a reminder when doubt
Comes into your mind.

1) because I want to
2) thanks to my determination
3) because if I do I will be a nicer person to myself, to those around and the world

6. What Obstacles Will Get In Your Way?

You might as well get them out so they do not end
Up stopping you again. Once you are aware of the
Reasons and excuses why your goals will not work,
You can move past them.

1) I might get rejected
2) loss of courage, fear, demoralization, giving up
3) I will stop looking and accept something I do not really like

7. What's The Reward?

How will you reward yourself for the short-term
Successes along the way? It does not matter how fast
You reach your goals. You are on the right track to
Reaching them!

1) by being nicer to myself
2) by going on a nice holiday
3) by feeling much better