I work as a lunchtime supervisor at a primary school, and have seen many different child behaviors and also managed to resolve many issues.

But this one has me stumped and I don't know how to handle it-a young child in my care, has started reception (1st year at school, she is 4) and we are now into week 3/4 of the term; the problem is as soon as her Mother drops her off at school, she cries; and when I come to look after her at lunchtime she cries solidly for 1 1/2 hours and all I manage to get out of her is "I feel sick" and "I want my Mummy".

I have tried introducing her to her class mates, have tried asking her what she likes to watch on TV, what's her favourite toy? does she like dancing? Singing? Tried getting her to join in her peers games. Shown her around the playground. Tried letting her "help" me do my job. But she just cries and cries, and we are talking real streams of tears.

The teachers at school have just said to ignore her, but I don't know if that is the best policy and just wondered if anyone out there could suggest anything that will help her day be a little happier.

Thanks.

It is a period of adjustment for her and it looks like you have been thorough trying new things. If nothing works then I don't know what you can do. As soon as she finds an interest, a playmate, liking the curiculum, there isn't much you can do. Does your mom know this is happening ? Maybe finding out what special treats she likes would help, her mom could help in that regard.

Thanks for that answer, it's a very difficult one I know. I am quite used to children crying, usually though it only lasts about 5-10 minutes and I can calm them down. But this little one is intent on making herself exhausted by crying and crying all day.

I have a little girl at the school also, she is in year 2 (6 years old) so a little older than this reception child. Anyway, obviously, I take my child to school in the morning, and this morning I happened to observe the crying reception child going into school-she was at full throtle at the door-screaming and crying, her teachers (it took 2 of them) were holding her very firmly to get her into the building. She screamed the loudest I have heard yet, and her Mother went back to her, which probably wasn't the best thing, but she is obviously feeling very distressed. The child, then, was picked up and practically dragged into school, and the Mother was left, by now crying herself.

It is heartbreaking to watch and I really feel for them as a family, because they are all obviously feeling this separation tough. And the only thing this child wants-her Mother-is the one thing we cannot give her.

I found an American website yesterday that suggests asking her 3 things she hates about school and 3 things she loves, it says not to offer any suggestions or solutions but rather to just listen to the child-I shall try it and see if that works, but I've got a feeling because she is crying and screaming so much (and I am really not exagerrating-it's an all day long thing, she doesn't stop even for a breather) that she won't even hear what I am saying.

One thing is for sure I am not ready to give up on this little girl, she is such a sweet little thing really and she has a couple of friends waiting to play with her, but they can't understand why she is crying so much, I hope they don't give up on her.