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    agmon's Avatar
    agmon Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Feb 24, 2007, 04:09 AM
    I have fear
    Hi There,I Love One Sister From Our Church,but The Time I Want To Propose Her, Fear Comes Along And I Will Start Talking About Godly Things.when We Part I Will Be Frusrated And Blaming Myself.while Im Alone I Will Think On How To Say I Love You,but When We Meet Fear Comes Again.what And How Should I Make It Coz I Love Her Andi Feel The More Time I Take Others Will Take Her?
    valinors_sorrow's Avatar
    valinors_sorrow Posts: 2,927, Reputation: 653
    I regard all beings mostly by their consciousness and little else
     
    #2

    Feb 24, 2007, 05:52 AM
    I don't know if courtship habits differ significantly where you live but where I live we take smaller steps. Its more like you ask her out, and if you both enjoy the time together, then do that again and again. Over time that builds a friendship, a relationship that will better support either of you expressing emotional messages like love and desire. As tempting as it is to go fast, what usually seems to happen with people who go fast is the relationship crashes like a airplane that ran out of gas. So I suggest smaller slower steps-- its less fearful and easier on you both. Good luck!
    shygrneyzs's Avatar
    shygrneyzs Posts: 5,017, Reputation: 936
    Uber Member
     
    #3

    Feb 24, 2007, 12:13 PM
    If you need some counseling on how to approach this girl, why not ask your Pastor? He knows both you and her. Is he someone that you respect? Would he listen to you honestly and give you good advice?

    I do not know your culture or church but starting a relationship by blurting out you love someone and want to marry them is going from zero to 100 in less than 5 seconds and that is more than a bit much.

    You do talk to her and she must like you, or she would not converse with you. How do her parents factor in this relationship? Could you approach her parents and ask for permission to date their daughter? You have to open to door and take the first step.
    ForeverZero's Avatar
    ForeverZero Posts: 312, Reputation: 82
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    #4

    Feb 24, 2007, 05:38 PM
    Fear is fear. Fear of talking to women is the same as fear of dogs that have bees in their mouth so when they bark they shoot bees at you. Here's the deal. Ask yourself what you want to happen between you two. The answer will be something.

    Want to know what's going to happen if you don't tell her how you feel?

    Nothing.

    That's not what you want. So if you want nothing to happen, don't say anything, if you do, it's time to embrace the horror and take that leap.
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
    Ultra Member
     
    #5

    Feb 24, 2007, 10:10 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by agmon
    Hi There,i Love One Sister From Our Church,but The Time I Want To Propose Her, Fear Comes Along And I Will Start Talking About Godly Things.when We Part I Will Be Frusrated And Blaming Myself.while Im Alone I Will Think On How To Say I Love You,but When We Meet Fear Comes Again.what And How Should I Make It Coz I Love Her Andi Feel The More Time I Take Others Will Take Her?
    I'm kind of confused by this question? Are you already dating? Because it sounds like you are but then you say others might take her out. You also say you want to propose but you can't say I love you, which I would assume comes before the proposal. So I'm just really confused on your status.
    kristenhi's Avatar
    kristenhi Posts: 6, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #6

    Feb 24, 2007, 10:43 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by agmon
    Hi There,i Love One Sister From Our Church,but The Time I Want To Propose Her, Fear Comes Along And I Will Start Talking About Godly Things.when We Part I Will Be Frusrated And Blaming Myself.while Im Alone I Will Think On How To Say I Love You,but When We Meet Fear Comes Again.what And How Should I Make It Coz I Love Her Andi Feel The More Time I Take Others Will Take Her?
    Dear agmon--

    I suggest that during one of the times you are trying to come up with ways to tell her how you feel, you write it down on paper. This way it will not only be clear and concise, but if you do freeze up again, you can always hand it to her or send it to her.

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