[ws327971]

Hey guys, so my girlfriend of a year and a half just broke up with me. She said she lost feelings for me but still loves me. She says she wants to be friends but I know I just can't settle for less.

But the main reason She claims she broke up with me is that when I express my feelings and problems (which she encourages me to do) that I'm bringing her down and making her feel guilty. I know I've had my faults. But I've been there for her through all her problems and never judged her once. I thought relationships were about supporting each other no matter what.

I don't know if I can ever get her back... but more importantly I don't quite know how to just move one. It's just not as easy as "getting over it".

[DoulaLC]

Sorry you are going through this, but unfortunately there is no easy way other than time. Do your best to keep busy with other areas of your life. Spend time with family and friends, focus on work or school. Maybe step out and try something new that you have been wanting to do. The point is, the more that you focus on other things, the less you will be dwelling on the break-up.

You will have some good days and some bad days, but eventually the good days will grow in number.

If being friends would just be too difficult, don't do it. No sense in postponing your healing. You could simply tell her that you prefer no contact as it is just too difficult as you try to move on.

Consider that she may be a nice person, but she was unable to "be there" to support you when you had problems to share, and that is likely not the sort of relationship you want to be in.

Time really does heal... take care of yourself and give yourself that time.

[talaniman]

You are righ, there is more to it than just getting over her, or just moving on. Basically it involves doing the very hard work of leaving her alone, and rebuild, and regrouping a life that makes you happy without her in it.

Here are ways that others have approached this same problem.