[spidy_six]

Hi All,

Got into another trouble, l have been posting different topics about my relationships till now and now I'm into another trouble, This time I'm in a 2way relationship.

To get into detail, One of my Colleagues Started spending time with me. She has had relationship for 4years and then broke up with him. I know her as a GF of my colleague, both are in my team at work. She always rejects him (he looks good and is pretty rich). 1 day I have asked her why are you rejecting him, she said that he proposed when she was just coming out of her breakup mood. So she said to him that she will think about it. Later she started spending time with him thinking that she can say yes, but the guy was very possesive and demanding, hence she started ignoring him.
I always used to support that guy in this matter. Suddenly 1day she told me that she has feelings for some other person, she spoke to my manager and told him that I'm that person. The next day I started asking her about her love interest she said she will discuss later. After some time I got a text on my Mobile stating that She loves me and is waiting for my reply. For some time I didn't have any words because 1st time a girl herself proposed me. I took time and discussed with her, told her about my past relationships and told her that I'm scared of getting into a relationship etc, She told that she will always be with me. 1 day I went to her home, we shared a good time, Suddenly she started crying and told me that she cannot live without me. I had no words and I decided to say yes to her. Though I did not say at the same time I started to have feelings for her. I kissed her for the 1st time. Every day we used to spend lot of time together.
Then suddednly my colleague who was around her came to know about this and he came to fight with me. He did not stop there, He called up her Ex - Boyfriend told him that she cheated him and all, he took him and went to her house. Since then my problems started. Because her Ex cried in front of her for all this and he stated that if these things wouldn't have happened he Was planning to come back to her. She was confused.

I have noticed that as she started feeling uncomfortable with me. When I wanted to kiss her she felt very uncomfortable. 1day she started crying, when I asker her she said its bcoz of her Ex, She is not able to forget him. I have clearly asked her if she wants to go back to him or not. She said she cannot go back to him. But still she behaved in the same way with me. My friends and Colleagues started telling me that she is not a nice girl and is just using me and all. But when ever I think about all these things I just get her picture when she was crying me, So I was never able to ask her whtr she is genuine or not. Then I have decided that its time to Propose her. I proposed her in an Amazing way and she was Impressed. But when I gave her a Ring she again started crying and told that I cannot commit you now Because things are not fine at my home as My Colleague has also called her parents and told rubbish about her. I have asked her again if it is related to her Ex, she said no She will never go back to him. Later she took ring.

But she used to discuss about her Ex lot of times with me. I asked her as many times as I can and always her answer was no I will not go back to my Ex. I thought she might need time. Suddenly she said she cannot work anymore as her father is insiting her to Complete Engineering. Henc eshe Joined College, She move to Hostel, She said that she will come to meet me every week and asked me not to come to her college as People will say lot of things.
Worst situation is Her Ex is also in the same College. Since she joined College she started Ignoring me. I hardly get a Chance to meet her. But she speeks with me Every day. 1day I have sent a mail to her about thing what I/m feeling but never got a response. As I Have her Email Password I used to Chk every day whtr she has Chkd or Not. As she did not have Internet facility at Hostel she did not Chk for many Days. But recently I found that She Chkd Mail, I still did not get any Response. She was supposed to meet me on Last Saturday and on Friday she told me that she has to go out of station for some college Presentation. I said No, she Convinced me and siad she will Come on Sunday tomeet me and will go back to Complete Presentation. I spoke to her on Sunday, She said she will be starting in 2Hrs, I called after 2Hrs No Response, She left a Msg Stating that she is in Conference and Will Call 1ce it is Done. I waited till 12 in the Night No Response. I Chkd her MailBox - For my Shock all of my Mails were deleted. I was Shattered. Called her Up - Call Waiting, Then Switched Off, Again Call Waiting, I Called her 30Times but No Response, I Left Voice MSg and Texts - No Response. That dauy I was Totally Broken. She simply Left a MSG in the Morning stating that she was not Feeling well so She slept and her Phn was with her Friend who was talking to his GF.
I did not feel like talking to her anymore. She did not even Call me on that day. 2Days later she left a MSG stating that she back to Town and Wants to meet me Before my shift starts. I did not Respond, She did not call me. Next day she left a MSG to my Friend asking me to Call her. I did not Call her neighter she did. This is the story till now my friends

Im totally broken now I love her a Lot but feel like she is not loving me any more.

Suggest me what should I Do Now? Cannot forget her.

[jaime90]

She didn't ever love you. A woman who is going behind her boyfriend's back to have a "love affair" with you, doesn't know what love is. She texted you that she "loves you" and guess what, I bet she told her boyfriend the same thing. She says she cannot be committed to you, and she just got out of a breakup. She is messed up. I suggest leaving her alone. Don't contact her. Don't try to get her back.

I don't understand when you say you are in a two way relationship. If you have two girlfriends, you need to leave them both, and get your head on straight- you have no right to be out there dating.

[Jake2008]

She was never available, sorry to say.

She never officially broke up with her boyfriend, just ignored him, and played him around until he snapped and wanted to fight you. Then he takes a friend to her parents house. She had him spinning.

Then she uses you to probably make a point with him- get him jealous, or to smarten up, or whatever.

You allowed yourself to be sucked into a relationship that was not a relationship. She was still involved with her "ex". Even when you fell for her, and proposed marriage, she still didn't have her head screwed on right, despite the words of love. All of it was hollow and meaningless.

Nobody can take advantage of you, or use you, unless you let them. Take a good look at what you yourself have written, and imagine that it was your best friend. What would you advise him to do.

Nothing that transpired between the two of you indicated any meaningful honest start to a long term relationship, and/or marriage. There was no honesty, no level playing field. She played you, and I suspect it was in order to control her boyfriend, the same way he was controlling her.

End the game and move on. You will hurt for a while, but it is far better to live through being a poor judge of character, and take your lumps, than to end up married to her.

[amicon]

I'm sorry but she's a player and you were played for a fool.
Stay well away from this drama and move on with your life.

Next time,get to know the person first,and don't get involved with someone who is already in a relationship.

[help_ful101]

Man I knew how that feels I was in a simlar situation but all I can say I was crush, hell I'm still crushed my first love but all I can say if its love , she'll neever forget at all, and you already seen how much see hurted you I would take another chance it might be more devasated then the first time.

Just wondering are you a female or male , females and males take this situation differently

[talaniman]

Get your ring back, and unpropose as even though it was hard to understand your post because of cultural differences, and that darn text chat speak, its clear she is not committed as you are.