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dxspyder · Nov 28, 2008, 09:08 PM

So me and my ex have been broken up for 8 months, I've been dating a girl for about 1 month, but I told her I'm taking things slow because of obvious reasons.

And lately my ex has been texting me, emailing me about how much she misses me/us... and she 'thinks' she wants to get back together, but when I ask her if she wants me back, she says she does want to get hurt again and not sure... she keeps telling me she misses everything about 'us' and enjoys my company. Yet when I ask her straight up, she is always hesitant and lost for an answer.

I started hanging out with her because I'm sure I still have feelings for her... but what does this alll mean?

Is she simply jealous? Or is she just making sure that I still have feelings for her before she actually gets over me?

I'm so confused because this came out of no where. Now I'm lost in terms of what to tell her or to do.

-Eddie

JohnD212 · Nov 28, 2008, 10:18 PM

You really need to start up No Contact at this point. She's probably jealous... and she'll do all she can to get you from that other girl... and the second you're back with her... she'll dump you again. If she's serious about you... she isn't showing it.

I say she's gone. You've moved on. Why get all confused about it and open yourself to that pain... the wounds are still newly healed from her... I know it'd be easy to go back to her.. but I suspect you'd just end up angry at her and at yourself.

dxspyder · Nov 28, 2008, 10:26 PM

I haven been utilizing the no contact. Was 3 months until she randomly started to talk to me... She says she wants us to work out but she's not willing to take the risk of getting back together cause she doesn't want to get hurt again.

Its enrages me somewhat knowing that she's doing this to me... playing games out of jealousy...

We're talking like nothings changed, she calls me by all my 'petnames' and calls me at night to say night.

yet she doesn't want to get back together right now. Im going to see her tomorrow, what should I tell her? I'm filled with mixed emotion and need a logical and educated response because I can't think straight... lol

MommieGina · Nov 28, 2008, 10:30 PM

In a situation like this I believe that your ex girlfriend is trying to do anything to stay a part of your life so by telling you she misses you and your relatinship together she is only reasuring herself you still care about her.. me being a female I can relate and honestly she is jealous of you new found interest in another woman and sees you happy and wants to do anything to possibly ruin that and slide her way back into your life but not for the right reasons... just an opinion on my part and may be different ,this is just what I assume...
There's an odvious reason you broke up and now she is worried your gone for good..?

dxspyder · Nov 28, 2008, 10:35 PM

Thanks for the replies... Im sure that what's going on and I've come to a realization that the girl I once loved is evil.

But are there any signs I can pick up to see if there's any sincerity in what she's saying?

I'm asking you mommiegina.

MommieGina · Nov 28, 2008, 10:41 PM

Originally Posted by dxspyder

Thanks for the replies...Im sure that whats going on and ive come to a realization that the girl i once loved is evil.

but are there any signs i can pick up to see if theres any sincerity in what shes saying?

im asking you mommiegina.

I think if she tells you things will be different the second time around and proves herself in a repectful manner and humbles herself to your feelings and your sacifices that you will have to make with you new girl then maybe it is worth giving it another chance.. But be the man that you are and do be blind to the odvious flags of her ways and motives.. follow your heart and stick with you feelings and not attrication and baby nicknames and sweet nothings:)

MommieGina · Nov 28, 2008, 10:42 PM

Originally Posted by MommieGina

I think if she tells you things will be different the second time around and proves herself in a repectful manner and humbles herself to your feelings and your sacifices that you will have to make with you new girl then maybe it is worth giving it another chance..But be the man that you are and do be blind to the the odvious flags of her ways and motives..follow your heart and stick with you feelings and not attrication and baby nicknames and sweet nothings:)

I meant DO NOT be blind

dxspyder · Nov 28, 2008, 10:49 PM

Thanks a lot.

lunasmom · Nov 28, 2008, 10:51 PM

She is stuck on the 'idea' of what the two of you had. All the good times, all the happy moments and in a time of loneliness, she reverts to those happy times for comfort. There may be a bit of jealously, but in all reality, she just wants to be happy again.

This does not mean, that you two getting back together will make her happy, but she thinks it will and will not let it go until she move forward.

As for you, you are caught up in the nostalgia of being wanted. It is always nice to be wanted. There is not, 'well I think I like her again, but I am not sure.' Either you do or you don't, plain and simple.

There is a reason you broke apart. There is a reason you have stayed apart so long.

MommieGina · Nov 28, 2008, 11:09 PM

Originally Posted by dxspyder

thanks alot.

your welcome... hope its helpful=)

kitten420 · Nov 29, 2008, 03:18 AM

Why did you guys break up in the first place?

Kati-Katt · Nov 29, 2008, 04:20 AM

A lot of things come out of nowhere imparticular. Maybe she forgot how much she missed you and wants back what she had. Watch how she acts around you, observe. If you feel stronger feelings for your ex rather than your current that could be another issue in itself. Think it through, you'll get through it in the end somehow. Good luck.

talaniman · Nov 29, 2008, 07:35 AM

I think she is succeeding in distracting you from moving on, and being with someone else.

She for sure has had plenty of chances to get over being afraid of being hurt, or why contact you at all.

Sorry, I smell a rat!

JohnD212 · Nov 29, 2008, 10:01 AM

You say you realize she's evil and yet you seem to be very concerned about her intentions. Who cares what they are. Are you really considering leaving a new relationship for one that ended almost year ago with someone you realize is evil?? Seriously??

Don't give it another thought. You said you did the no contact but if you truly did... you wouldn't be talking to her. No contact means no contact... forever.

At this point... any steps you make towards her... you've been warned and you even know for yourself what's there. The pain that will come from that is all yours my friend.