Check out some similar questions!

andie9923 · Aug 24, 2008, 06:50 PM

My son, 22, will be released from jail in October. I want him to live in our home and my husband says he cannot. Both my husband and I are listed on the deed to the home. Can my husband not allow my son to stay in the home and evict him, or because he has MY PERMISSION, can he stay?

Please, serious answers only~I know I'll need to see an attorney, so I don't need stupid answers like that... I'm just curious if anyone knows the answer so I have some bargaining space in this process to force my husband to get an attorney.

Fr_Chuck · Aug 24, 2008, 07:21 PM

OK, can you, yes, either person who owns the home can give permission for a quest to stay. BUt can your husband call his parole officer every day with complaints about him till he gets revolked, yes he could,
Could your husband make his life miserable, yes he can.

So unless you are ready for a divorce it appears you have to choose a husband or a son.

My best suggestion, one that I personally have done, don't let him stay in your home, he gets or could get to used to living free and to be honest parents will let them go months and months before doing anyting..

You help pay his rent at a efficieny or a funished room for about two months to let him get a start,

andie9923 · Aug 24, 2008, 07:30 PM

Yes, divorce is in the future, but I need as much time as possible to get my affairs in order.. waiting for Social Security Disability ruling... so I know what kind of money I have to live on.I WILL choose my son over my husband... any day. He will be on non-reporting probation, so unless he does something or gets a new charge, the probation officer isn't interested in him.. he already violated his probation in another county, but because it wasn't a "new charge", he didn't care and hung up on his probation officer from the other county. My husband is mental and verbal abuser and "provokes" my son into getting into arguments and my son is a very violent person... so, it would be very easy to get him to "assault" him, but also very easy as the witness to have my husband charged with assault as well... kind of a lose/lose for both of them if things get to out of control. So, basically, I just need time to get my affairs in order, but want ot make sure my son can live here if he has my permission and basically force my soon to be ex to get an attorney and pay for the eviction process... I'm just looking for bargaining chips at this point...

Thanks for your input... I actually did contact a legal aid person and am seeing one Tuesday for free legal advice.. so, hopefully, I'll get a decent answer AND find out how much money my ex will have to pay... any ideas on how much of his pension I'm entitled to ? I keep getting different answers.. some say 50%, someone else said 20%.. he is already receiving his pension...

Fr_Chuck · Aug 24, 2008, 07:39 PM

If you are not home, son who is on probation, and husband gets into fight, guess who most likely goes back to jail ?

Also if he already violated his probation, and he is "hanging" up on a probation officer you may as well kiss him good bye, the probation officers don't take this type of thing nicely and it does not have to be a criminal issue, any violation even a technical one has to be addressed if not they will revolk him.

Now the probation issue is separate as I have been thinking about it,
Most likely if one person who owns the house objects to him living there, the probation officer may not allow him to live there. While you legally can give him permission, the probation officer if the other person objects can also demand him move also. So this is something that will also be up to the PO,

And don't expect PO to be nice people on this, if someone is complaining all the time on him, it will have an effect.

andie9923 · Aug 25, 2008, 05:58 AM

No, I didn't make myself clear... when he violated his probation in Fairfield County, his p/o called Franklin County probation officer and the probation officer hung up on the other county P./O.. he wasn't interested in probation violations that didn't include a new charge. Franklin county has more crime to be concerned about than a 3rd degree misdeameanor probation violation in a hick county Fairfield county is to Franklin County like Mayberry would be to New York City... my son is on non-reporting probation in Franklin county with 6 months hanging over his head only if he obtains a new charge.. So, the probation officer isn't going to be wasting much time with my son.. he hasn't been concerned about him for the past year of his probation... so, as long as my son stays clean, he'll be o.k. there. That's why he is serving his time in Fairfield county.. he could've taken 2 years reporting probation, but opted to take his 4 months in jail and be finished with it. Done. No reporting to anyone, no answering to anyone, no random drug tests... just clean and done.

So, tomorrow, I guess I will find out from an attorney that hopefully will have some definite answers, otherwise, my son will come home and that will force my husband's hand and I guess we'll see what happens from there... I honestly don't think my husband will waste the money he doesn't have on hiring an attorney for the process... he's having enough trouble coming up with $300 to get the process rolling on bankruptcy...

ScottGem · Aug 25, 2008, 06:05 AM

Originally Posted by andie9923

and my son is a very violent person....

As Chuck said, Your husband can't evict as long as you are an equal owner of the property. But given the above statement, do you really want your son living with you? And do you really want to risk he and your husband getting into a fight that could result in injury?

As for the PO. This PO seems to not want anything to rock the boat. So, if your husband is bugging him, he might violate your son just to get your husband off his back.

Bottomline, I see having your son move in a recipe for disaster.

rockinmommy · Aug 25, 2008, 06:32 AM

You are setting your son up for disaster. You've already established that you don't care two hoots about your soon-to-be ex-husband, but why put your son into a situation that's just begging for disaster??

I understand that you want to help him, but he needs calm, neutral, easy surroundings. Not people fighting (about him and who knows what else).

I don't think you're choosing him over your husband. I think you're setting him up to fail!

excon · Aug 25, 2008, 06:50 AM

Hello andie:

Mommy is right. Sonny is going to kick pappas a$$, or the other way around. There ain't no question in my mind.

This has got to have dawned on you... I think you want it to go down.

excon

froggy7 · Aug 25, 2008, 07:26 AM

Originally Posted by excon

Hello andie:

Mommy is right. Sonny is gonna kick pappas a$$, or the other way around. There ain't no question in my mind.

This has got to have dawned on you.... I think you want it to go down.

excon

Reading between the lines, I get the feeling that she wants it to happen because she thinks that she will be able to get the husband on assault charges if it does, and thinks that may make her case better in the divorce. That's just the vibe I'm picking up. Which is a terrible thing to do to both of them.