[littleredcherry]

Hi I'm 16 and pregnant. I don't know if I should keep her or give it to someonefor adoption. Its to late to avort what should I do help!

[rionne1]

Hi im 16 and pregnant. i don't know if i should keep her or give it to someonefor adoption. Its to late to avort what should i do help!!

Do not be afraid. I had my first child when I was 17 and he is the light of my life. I would not know what I would do without him. I prayed a lot. Believe me it helps. If you would like to talk more please talk to me. I will help in any way that I can.

[louise1200]

Personally I couldn't give a child away, no matter what age I was. But I think you have to decide what you want to do. Don't worry about what other people think, if you think you would like to bring it up then do there's plenty off help for mothers these days, if giving it away is what you want then do that . This is your baby so decide what would make you happy and go for it. Hope this helps, x x

[DoulaLC]

There is no easy answer, but much to consider. Will you be able to provide for a baby the way you would like to right now? Will you have the support of family, and if not, how well will you do without their help? What sort of plans do you have for your education... career goals? Is the father in the picture... what about the support of his family? Do you go out a great deal with your friends... if so, will you be able to cut back on that time?

Some people do quite well having a baby at a young age. They often get help from family, community support services, or the father of their baby. They are able to continue their education, obtain a good job, and enjoy spending the time necessary to parent their child well.
Others do not do well at all... plan to finish school, but never do... find they have to depend on government support for a long time, resent the time a baby requires, find their boyfriend, and sometimes many of their friends, don't stick around, etc..

It can be done with determination and commitment (doesn't matter what age you are, but obviously it can be more challenging for someone at 16). Some decide to go the adoption route when they feel they won't be able to provide for the child the way they would like to... or find they just don't want to take on the responsibility and know they won't do a good job. There are options with adoption and some choose to stay in contact with the family, sometimes even spending time with the child as they grow up. Others choose not to have any contact, but leave the door open should their child want to contact them in the future.

Only you can decide what will be the pros and cons of both situations. It is important to not only consider the immediate future, but what about in 3 years, 5 years, etc..
I wish you well, hope you have your family supporting you in whatever decision you make.

[babygirl1092]

I think that you should do what your heart feels that you need to do. Most women have a change of heart once they see their baby. It's a great thing to be a mother and I had my daughter at 16 also and she was my every thing and I wouldn't change having her for the world. But I do believe that u thought you where big enough to have sex so you should step up to the plate and take care of your baby. Abortion isn't the way out. It would have left u with a lot of what ifs. So I am very happy u didn't choose to do that. I wish you and your baby the best of luck. And hope u do the best thing for you and your baby

[littleredcherry]

Hello rionne1 I want to keep her but I don't know if I will be a good mother. Anser me and tell me about your expiriences please! :) littleredcherry

[babygirl1092]

I am not one of the norm stories my boyfriend had a son when we got together and I was pregnant with my exs baby, and we went through a lot of stuggles it wasn't a cake walk at all, and sure there are a lot of things you'll have to give up. You are no longer a 16 year old teen after the birth of your daughter. You have to be a 16 year old mother. There are no more later night parties no more just hanging out. All of your time and energy goes to taking care of this baby and having sleep less nights struggling to finsh school and make ends meet. But once you get on your feet its all worth it.

[ang8318]

As far as you not knowing if you are going to be a good mother... I felt the same, but we are in totally different situations. I am married, 25, and own my home, and I STILL felt like I did not know how to be a good mom. Do not worry, I think it comes naturally. I totally changed in the weeks after my baby was born, now I consider myself a very good mother. So out of everything you have to worry about right now, I would not worry about that. What you do need to do if you want to keep the baby is figure out a plan, where will you live, will you work? Continue school? Who will take care of the child while you are at work/school? How will you support your child? Figure these things out first, because once you do, you will find that being a "good" mother kind of come naturally once the child is born.

[louise1200]

If you want to keep her then do, This is your baby were talking about, your flesh and blood, So say keep her. She is yours.

[LearningAsIGo]

Its important to think about the baby, not just yourself. Have your parents agreed to help?

Some questions you should ask yourself:

Will I be a good mother? (Nobody knows that until they become one ;) )
Can I afford the baby?
Will my parents help me? Will the baby's father and his family help?
Am I ready to provide everything ($, insurance, food, clothes, time, energy, etc.) a baby would need?
Am I ready to sacrifice my youth and the way I live now?
Will I be comfortable with adoption?
What will my future hold depending on the choice I make?
Where will the baby go while I'm in school?

I don't mean to bombard you, but there are some serious things to think about. I can't tell you what the best decision is for you and your baby, but don't count out open adoption. That allows you to choose the couple you'd like and you can have a relationship with your child.
GL making that final decision.