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    mmar0602's Avatar
    mmar0602 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Oct 16, 2007, 10:56 AM
    Heart broken
    I been with a guy for almost a year. And he broke up with me. I loved him so much. Its hard for me to get over him? What can I do to help me not be depressed all the time.:(
    little firefly's Avatar
    little firefly Posts: 139, Reputation: 36
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Oct 16, 2007, 02:33 PM
    I can completely understand how you are feeling. I went through a breakup this year that has been very hard on me. I've found that it helps to just try to keep busy. Hang out with friends, join a gym, find a hobby that you enjoy. I know it's easier said than done and sometimes you'll have to force yourself to want to do anything at all. Just know that with each day you will feel a little bit stronger, the hurt will start to go away and you will feel like living again. It will take some time, but you will get there. Good luck to you.
    Diamondstar03's Avatar
    Diamondstar03 Posts: 83, Reputation: 5
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    Oct 16, 2007, 05:18 PM
    I am going through the same thing, seems NC is a good way to feel better. I know it doesn't make since but you will see how after a few weeks or even a month it will seem different. I am starting to feel that way, but still confused, hope that helps.
    statictable's Avatar
    statictable Posts: 436, Reputation: 34
    Full Member
     
    #4

    Oct 16, 2007, 06:20 PM
    Everyone who reads your note will carry a bit of you with them as well as a bit of your broken heart and slowly your pain will decline and in the future you'll be able to do the same for others. Best wishes.
    babigirl1's Avatar
    babigirl1 Posts: 127, Reputation: 12
    Junior Member
     
    #5

    Oct 16, 2007, 08:02 PM
    Getting over someone you love is very hard. I myself believe everything happens for a reason and if it is meant for you two to be together in the future it will happen. Take all the love and happiness you got from this relationship and carry it with you always. Learn from what you are going through. There is a time , place and purpose for all things. Even the pain.

    We as being human, hate to have pain in our lives, but it is a learning lesson for us all. We just have to take the time to learn what it is that we are to get from this.

    People often have big things happen in their lives and never take the time to set back and see what we are to learn. Its only when we learn what it is that live it trying to tell us, will we be able to move on.

    Pain can consume our every being and keep us from learning. Especially when we have a broken heart.
    Sweety just think of the good times and try to learn what you are to learn from this. And one day you will be grateful that you spent the time you did with him.
    enigmagnetic's Avatar
    enigmagnetic Posts: 333, Reputation: 45
    Full Member
     
    #6

    Oct 16, 2007, 08:13 PM
    I'm going to say something I say here quite often only because it was my salvation.

    1. Maintain no contact at all costs.

    2. Find a hobby plus work out

    3. Find a volunteering group and give back to your community(helps with self esteem and consumes loads of time in a positive setting)

    4. Start writing in a journal, but only when you feel sad. Write about that experience and what made you sad. Getting it on paper is known to be very therapeutic.

    Good luck my dear.
    MissingHim2Much's Avatar
    MissingHim2Much Posts: 252, Reputation: 37
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    #7

    Oct 16, 2007, 09:42 PM
    No Contact all the way!! I can't stress this enough. It's been three months since my breakup and even though I'm still sad a lot of the time I can honestly say that no contact has made me a stronger person. I bet I even come off as a much stronger person then he thought I could be too.
    whiteribbon's Avatar
    whiteribbon Posts: 31, Reputation: 5
    Junior Member
     
    #8

    Oct 17, 2007, 04:10 AM
    I agree no contact is the best way - its been 2 weeks since my break up and its been hard but I feel so much stronger and everyday I feel better because by no contact I have my power back, he's been contacting via text and email... I read and then delete, since I have made no effort to reply he's obviously wondering why and to be honest he can keep on wondering why because everyday my desire to contact him or be contacted by him lessens! Keep busy - I can't stress this enough - don't neglect yourself but be kind with yourself, patient, if you feel like crying then cry, just go with your emotions and what your feeling and in time it will be OK, believe me I've been there 4 times now and I've never felt so strong, dignified and respectful of myself... take up a hobby, see old mates, make new mates, go for walks, I started kickboxing 2 days after he left me and it's the best thing I have ever done and hell I even have a date on Friday!!
    So chin up, keep smiling, be brave, be dignified, go and be you, you are the most important person right now so remember that!

    Feel free to message me if you need to vent your feelings...
    indecipher411's Avatar
    indecipher411 Posts: 7, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #9

    Oct 17, 2007, 09:12 AM
    I've been dumped several times in my life (I'm a guy) and every time was devastating. I was depressed for months, if I had a job at the time I quit it, if I was in a college class at the time I dropped out, I stopped hanging out with friends. ---->All very dumb things. You HAVE to live your life... hang out with friends is the most important thing. Keep talking to people - but not about the break-up, not until you can do it without a depressed emotion. Most important - you will find someone else, and you will be stronger when you find them.
    enigmagnetic's Avatar
    enigmagnetic Posts: 333, Reputation: 45
    Full Member
     
    #10

    Oct 17, 2007, 10:25 AM
    Hey there white ribbon you can kick box me anytime. If you pin me you win!

    NOw for the matter at hand, dear girl, remain productive. We all seem to agree on the NC thing. Start jogging that helps greatly.
    shazzamax's Avatar
    shazzamax Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #11

    Oct 18, 2007, 02:53 AM
    I know exactly how you feel because I was recently dumped, it's the most awful feeling in the world, especially as I thought "this was the one". He promised me the world, then kicked me in the teeth. Its only been a week, I've cried, I've screamed and I've been so down, but I know it will get better. He dumped me by email, very cowardly. I did email him back, but he didn't reply. I have some of his stuff which I need to send him and then that will be the end of contact with him. Its so difficult because all I want to do is ring him, text him, email him but I know deep down in my heart he won't reply and at the end of the day its only myself I'm hurting.
    I am trying to keep busy and trying to plan ahead for next year, it keeps me focused on things. It does get easier hun and you will move on, you need to go through this period of bereavement to come out the other side a stronger person.
    Hugs, x
    brookeleigh's Avatar
    brookeleigh Posts: 119, Reputation: 4
    Junior Member
     
    #12

    Oct 18, 2007, 02:56 AM
    I was with my boyfriend for a year too.. except the fact he was having an affair on me the whole time. Its hard but you have to move on. Try having fun. Get in good shape.. make him feel like a idiot for losing you!
    whiteribbon's Avatar
    whiteribbon Posts: 31, Reputation: 5
    Junior Member
     
    #13

    Oct 19, 2007, 02:14 AM
    Enigmagnetic... Ok your on!! But ud have to catch me first!! Haha!

    But in all honesty hun you'll be fine given time and after all its his loss and oneday he will realise that - by that time you'll be completely over it and happy with you and who knows maybe happy with someone else, how can you possibley meet Mr Right when uve been dating Mr Wrong? Keep your chin up and smile for the world to see :)
    Pinkie_Roxeee's Avatar
    Pinkie_Roxeee Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #14

    Apr 7, 2010, 09:28 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by babigirl1 View Post
    getting over someone you love is very hard. I myself believe everything happens for a reason and if it is meant for you two to be together in the future it will happen. take all the love and happiness you got from this relationship and carry it with you always. Learn from what you are going thru. There is a time , place and purpose for all things. even the pain.

    We as being human, hate to have pain in our lives, but it is a learning lesson for us all. We just have to take the time to learn what it is that we are to get from this.

    People often have big things happen in their lives and never take the time to set back and see what we are to learn. Its only when we learn what it is that live it trying to tell us, will we be able to move on.

    Pain can consume our every being and keep us from learning. especially when we have a broken heart.
    Sweety just think of the good times and try to learn what you are to learn from this. and one day you will be grateful that you spent the time you did with him.
    Your words are so relieving babigirl... I'm heartbroken but I can't stop contacting him... I begged him that we stay in touch because I can't imagine he's not in my life at least as a friend!! I don't know what to do... I'm only alive because he's still in ma life even if I dun have any right to love him anymore... I can't forget him!!

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