[stressedoutmom]

My daughter will turn 18 in 2008. She has been in Juvenile Detention for assault of me and of my younger daughter, and for vandalism. She spent 4 months in the County Juvenile Detention Home. She is disrespectful and DOES Not want to follow the household rules. She has ran away several times although she was grounded. When I try to discipline her she just laughs in my face. She has called me the "B" word and said I am an idiot and she does not have to listen to me.

She was also suspended from school for giving her prescription drugs to a 14 year old. She constantly fights with my younger daughter who is 16 years old.

We have been seeing a therapist for over a year and she is also very disrespectful to him.

My husband works in another state and comes home only on the weekends. My younger daughter and I feel like we are walking on eggshells and we live in a state of constant misery and tension when she is around. I am planning a move next spring to be with my husband.

The problem is that she is only in 10th grade. (she got left back in the 8th grade). She does not know if she wants to finish HS and is not sure if she wants to move to another state with me.

What are my rights as a parent? I am on the verge of a nervous breakdown and am taking several tranquilizers.

Can I help her to get a GED when she is 18 and then evict her or not allow her to move with me? Am I forced to live with this misery forever?

We live in Virginia. What are the options?

[Fr_Chuck]

Well personally while not legal, I don't know I would not have already kicked her at at 17 and let social services worry about her.

But at 18, if she is doing all of that, pack her bags, set them out and change the locks and don't look back,

[s_cianci]

I agree with the above. Move and don't give her the address.

[stonewilder]

I agree with the above too. It's time she learns the hard lesson that she dosen't rule the world or your house.

[ScottGem]

If she has been in detention she must have been assigned a case worker. Have you tried discussing this with the case worker?

[cdad]

If the problem pesists and she turns 18 and you have to use tough love to remove her from your home then you can apply for a restraining order against her. That way you have some grounds to deal with her. Its very heartwrenching situation and you also have another daughter to protect. With a restraining order in place it will limit contact and you can have your daughter included on it along with abusive behavior such as phone calls. The sad part is that if you do this you absolutely have to follow through with it.
As far as her education she may already be qualified to take a GED. There are many books etc for taking the test that you can look at to try to help her.
Take a breath and relax. You have a lot of decision making to do.

[marygail]

I would like to found out how things went with your daughter. I have the same problem with my daughter.