[itsjustme123]

I don't know what to do.
He is my first love, first serious boyfriend and he's going away to another state for five months for college.
Well actually, we'll be on the opposite sides of the world for five months.
The thing I don't understand is, he left this to the last minute to break it off, we both fell in love with each other and then all of a sudden he says he just can't do it. He says he's been broken from long distance from a past relationship he had, and that even though I'm a different girl, his heart isn't strong enough.
He doesn't want me to hang on for five months for him, but I know I could and would do it for him.
It may not be the right thing to do, but I love him.
I need him and I cannot bear the thought of being with any other guy, but him.
What in the world do I do?
Do I text him one last time, even though he broke up with me in person?
I just need him to say it's all going to be OK. I just need some sort of hope.
Please help me.

[Ivaaa]

Ah, I'm very sorry to say this to you, but there are low hopes for him to come back to you. Though, he didn't brake up because of the lack of feelings, but because he got scared of the distance. It is very hard, especially because he is the one to go, so he also carries the 'guilt' of making you wait.
I don't think your message or words can change anything now. This is not a brake up because he doesn't love you or so, this is a break up out of insecurity. The hardest part is that it doesn't make any difference to you in reality. You can't convince him that you will work out, it takes two. I've been there. He has to think it and believe in it for himself.
The thing is that, the moment he told this to you, he started pushing you away in his head, and he started doing everything he can to forget you. Therefore, you telling him how you feel doesn't make much sense, because it just additionally makes it harder for him to break it off. And he obviously decided to.

It's very hard, but convincing him into something in this situation is just going to make you feel really bad about yourself, and probably you're going to see that he has feelings, but it still doesn't change anything, which is a true killer.

I would advice you to move on as much as you can, do things that make you happy, and try to put him aside. Who knows, maybe you meet when he comes back and things get better, but in order for this to happen, you both need to be fresh and stable and happy people, and not torn out from waiting.

Good luck, I know how hard this is.

[vanheart]

Like your name says, Its just you. Not him.

That's keeping yourself in misery.

"I need him"

You certainly don't need someone that doesn't want what you want. Or you. Really. Right?

One thing I know, is that when someone isn't there, & feels the same way, then there really isn't any reason to put your energy there.

He's doing his best guy thing to break up. Listen, carefully.

You can fight your love for him all you want, but, you would be better off not to.
Doing your own thing.

We all live & learn.

[talaniman]

I think you give yourself some time to recover from the shock, disappointment, and hurt, maybe a month, before you do anything.

You have to mourn your loss before you accept it. Family and friends to support you through this is a great thing to have.

Good luck.

[itsjustme123]

My boyfriend broke off our relationship as he is going to overseas for five months to study in college. He said he is still in love with me, but he couldn't put me through the pain of long distance as he's been in a bad situation before with a past relationship.
He says he'll miss me so much and he wants me to find happiness, because it's something he is unable to give me right now.
I have had no trouble moving on and letting go with past boyfriends... But he is something else.
I am very in love with him. I have this connection with him that I can't shake and I know he feels the same. It was an unfortunate event, and I know he is doing this to prevent hurting me from long distance. But I can't leave him.
I'm wondering, how do you think I should go about contacting him in the future?
I'm thinking I'll let it go for maybe two months and see how I am feeling..
I don't want our relationship to fade..
He is too important for that.

[talaniman]

I think for now you are in denial his priorities in life have changed. For whatever reason he doesn't want a long distance relationship.

Make your mind up to leave this situation alone for 6 months, instead of just two.

[mmresd]

You don't need any hope. He has broken up with you, you need to accept his decision, especially if you love him. He is not willing to try to work at a long distance relationship, and with good reason; I personally believe they don't work. However, whatever the reason may be he has made his choice. No text, no contact, start to move on, hope will only make you more miserable. No one ever thinks they will ever meet someone else after a relationship, the wound is fresh, let time do its job and keep yourself busy in the meantime.

[Fr_Chuck]

He also knew that he wants to be able to date, go out and have fun when he is away in school. You did not say your age?

But he is clear, and there is little ( really nothing) you can do about it. You can keep false hope or you can accept it.