[livebait]

I am about to get married to the love of my life and we decided not to have sex until our wedding night. The problem is that both me and her are virgins. I'm sort of scared about it because of breaking her hymen. I heard that it hurts but that is not my main concern. What I am worred about is the bleeding that is said to occur after the hymen breaks. I would like to know if anybody could tell me what to do about the bleeding, or correct me if I'm wrong. Plus any first time pointers would be good also. Thanks

[Dragonfire24]

Ok, there shouldn't be much blood so don't expecta blood bath. Second, even though she is a vrigin, she may not still have a hymen. It's actually common for it to break, especially if she usus tampons during her monthly. Third, since it is her first time, and yours, just take it slow. Be sure to thouroughly enjoy every minute of it.

[bob101]

Cause it's a good thing

[talaniman]

Go slow and use a whole lot of foreplay, a whole lot.

[ScottGem]

I agree with Tal and Dragon would add one thing; KY Jelly.

Also don't think you have to break the hymen on your wedding night. That's not why you got married. If it hurts too much then work slowly on widening the vagina using your fingers or some "toys".

[poseidon]

Hello livebait,

Firstly, congratulations on your approaching marriage. I hope you both have a wonderful day.

There are a lot of myths about a woman losing her virginity. Some people and cultures think that it must hurt when the sexual act is first performed. This is not necessarily the case. Although it is possible that the woman or the man could experience discomfort or a little pain if either or both are tense or if the woman's vagina is not moist and receptive.

It is true that some women can bleed when the hymen is initially broken or even on the second, third or fourth time that sexual intercourse takes place but again the most likely cause is because she is tense and not moist enough.

When you make love for the first time, try to get the time and conditions right. If you are not both ready when you first enter the marital bed, there is no law saying you have to perform the sexual act on your wedding night. Although every one expects that this will occur on this day, you both want to be able to remember your first sexual union fondly and not as a task that has to be performed on the day you get married. If you are not both ready, don't worry about it and don't feel obligated by what society expects.

When you sleep together for the first time, be gentle and caring toward each other, take it slowly and there is every chance that you will both become relaxed enough and want to take that 'first' step. But if not, you have plenty of time. You have waited this long so a little longer will not do either of you any harm. This is something very personal to you both and it is for you both to decide when the time is right. It is no ones business whether you make love on your wedding night or not, this is personal to you. You don't have to publish details in the national press or on a prominent notice board.

If you are both concerned that your new wife may bleed and it may leave a stain on the bed clothes, place something to prevent this. If she does bleed it is likely only to be a few spots, not puddles of it.

The hymen is not as tough as leather and it does not require brute force to break and gentle pressure should be sufficient to break it.

My advice is for both of you to see your doctor and ask his/her advice and get your information from them. You may feel a little embarrassed but don't be I am sure they will be more than happy to help.

Below is are a couple of websites that you may both find informative and helpful and a Search Engine search will provide more. The first link if a pdf file.

http://www.rutgersnissogroep.nl/rutg...b5a35021aafeb2

http://www.sexual-health-resource.org/virginity.htm

Although I am sure you are aware, it is still possible for a virgin to become pregnant the first time she has unprotected sexual intercourse. If neither of you want to take the chance of this happening, please take the necessary precautions.

Finally, talk to your fiancé and let her know your concerns. I am sure she will appreciate it and understand.

I hope this has been of help to you and may I wish you a long, happy and loving life together.

Cy
(Poseidon)

[429729]

It's not going to be pouring blood... I didn't even notice it (except on my panties)... and it was like spotting... not like a full on waterfall of blood

[sallgood]

In this say and age the hymen is usually borken as a young child... with tampons and sports etc. there are many women whose are broken before veen using a tampon. Just take it slow have fun... and don't worry too much that will make it more awkward... you love her... so show her

[livebait]

Thanks very much. You helped a lot especially poseidon, thank you. I'm sure it's going to be great. And as for protection, we both want to have children soon. Wish me luck!

[Dragonfire24]

Just be sure to give us a thumbs up if all goes well. ^_^

[chuff]

If your both virgins things are already looking up for you. Neither of you have any preconceived notions about what the other should do or is expecting before you consummate your marriage. You are both free to learn, play, and enjoy each other without any the worries of comparisons or expectations.

Congratulations and good luck.

[heartbeauty]

Well you already got the answers all I can say is good luck..
Just make you first night exciting and amazing and very special and passionate

[JoeCanada76]

Oh yes, and since you are both virgins. A very good sense of humour is important to have for you first time as well. Laugh, smile and enjoy.

Joe