Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    pbasu's Avatar
    pbasu Posts: 4, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jun 6, 2007, 11:46 PM
    Relationship with a student
    Dear Sir/Madam
    I am working as a lecturer in a college .My age is 27 years and I am an unmarried male. While teaching to a student in my college I fall in her Love .The girl is from a different community and her age is 23 years .While I was passing through this stage I become so much emotionally involved with her that one day I proposed her . As I proposed her she replied that she liked me but she does not love me,further she added that she is already engaged with some other guy .

    I want to come out from this relationship because this relationship is nither socially acceptable nor she loved me .

    I tried my best to forget her , but I can't . Please help !

    I totally lost my mental peace .
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
    Uber Member
     
    #2

    Jun 7, 2007, 01:19 AM
    I hope that you have learned some lessons here. For one thing, you should be concentrating only on teaching the students. I know that everyone is of consenting age and everything, but you must consider your standing where you work and the professional demeanor that you must be presenting to others. How you present this is paramount to how well you teach and whether you will keep your job.

    Sorry to come down so hard on you. But, you were not hired to fall in love with any student. You were hired to teach them.

    You will get over her. It sounds more like you were infatuated with her anyway. That would put it into the category of a "crush." She said that she is in love with someone else and also that she is engaged. That puts her "off limits" right there as far as I am concerned. I was in a situation a number of years ago where I was in love with someone who was just living with someone. As far as I was concerned, she was free to be courted. She later became married to the person with whom she was living. I still love her, but she is off limits to me. We are still friends, though. It is okay. I can handle it. You can too.

    When you have a job, part of the thing is to make yourself "indispensable" to those who employ you. Were you making yourself indispensable by getting involved with a student?

    Having students in a class is a "captive audience." It's easy for a professor to take advantage of the situation.

    You need to get yourself involved with socializing with your peers and people who are interested in the same things that you are. If you want a relationship with someone on your level, then it is best to do that. Go to clubs, church, dances, meetings for single people, etc.

    You will get over this. Just please keep your professionalism to your students as your first priority. You will find someone else to your liking.
    shygrneyzs's Avatar
    shygrneyzs Posts: 5,017, Reputation: 936
    Uber Member
     
    #3

    Jun 7, 2007, 04:00 AM
    Consider yourself fortunate that she did not report you to the college's president and board of directors. You can get over this and should do all your best to get past the infatuation you had with this student.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #4

    Jun 7, 2007, 12:49 PM
    Time will heal, but I hope you don't repeat the same mistake, getting involved with your students.
    pbasu's Avatar
    pbasu Posts: 4, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #5

    Jun 8, 2007, 09:59 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman
    Time will heal, but I hope you don't repeat the same mistake, getting involved with your students.



    Yah, I agree with u, I am trying my best to forget her...
    Thank you for your suggestion

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search


Check out some similar questions!

F1 to H1 for Pakistani student [ 7 Answers ]

Hi, Thanks a lot for helping us. I have few question. :) I am from Paskistan. I was on F-1 from 2002 to OCT-2004 Then converted to H-1 In 2003, I filled the 1040NR-EZ and got my returns back. This year (2004) can I file 1040NR-EZ? I left USA to visit my country for one month (30 days)....

Student Loans [ 14 Answers ]

I plan to move out of my parents house at the onset of this June. I plan to have a job by the end of June until mid August when I will relocate again to campus which I will attend for the next four years. I intend to enroll full time. Is there a way that I can do all this and get a loan for $20000...

F1 student taxes [ 1 Answers ]

Hi, I am a student from India studying in the USA. I wanted to know if I can file for 1040EZ instead of 1040NREZ as 1040EZ allows me efiling as well as deductions for education as I am a graduate student. Can this be done? Thanks, Abhimanyu

Getting student loans [ 2 Answers ]

I would be glad if someone can guide me through places/ organisations/ banks that offer student loans to international students without having the need to get it co-signed by a US citizen or greencardholder.

How to well in college being a new student [ 4 Answers ]

I am a new student at a junior college taking 4 classes. How do you study for them? Do I just study each class a little a day, or what? I am confused with How I will get all A's. It's a little overwhelming. Thanks


View more questions Search