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    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #281

    Apr 14, 2021, 11:25 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by jlisenbe View Post
    That was the scenario I was responding to. Next thing I know, I'm talking to someone who watches church repeatedly. Oh well.
    Then PLEASE add an introductory phrase or sentence to let me know you are responding to the scenario I presented to waltero. I thought you were just being annoying.

    I shouldn't connect online with churches and pastors? What other suggestions can you offer?
    jlisenbe's Avatar
    jlisenbe Posts: 5,019, Reputation: 157
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    #282

    Apr 14, 2021, 11:36 AM
    Me? Annoying?

    I shouldn't connect online with churches and pastors? What other suggestions can you offer?
    I would hope you continue to do so.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #283

    Apr 14, 2021, 11:46 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by jlisenbe View Post
    Me? Annoying?
    *whistles tunelessly*
    I would hope you continue to do so.
    Whew!
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #284

    Apr 14, 2021, 12:27 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by jlisenbe View Post
    I'll give a shot at it. I'd ask you if there was a reason why you do not attend church.
    Now that I understand this post of yours, I'd certainly disagree with that approach and your question. It's asked much too early in the possible relationship, is very nosy and even confrontational. Also, we psychotherapists encourage making "I" statements -- so as time goes on and as the friendship develops, "Oh, by the way, I attend XYZ church and would love to have you join me there next Sunday." Then listen carefully to the response.
    jlisenbe's Avatar
    jlisenbe Posts: 5,019, Reputation: 157
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    #285

    Apr 14, 2021, 12:42 PM
    This was the situation you presented. "Pretend you met me for the first time at the grocery store. We discovered, while standing in line at the deli, that we live on the same street and know some of the same people. You asked me if I attend any church. I vigorously shake my head "no" and say, "Yuk!" Walter, what would you say to me in response?"

    Already, in your scenario, your rule has been broken. "You asked me if I attend any church." Certainly not an "I" statement and about as nosy as it gets, so you've already let the cat out of the bag. I wouldn't ask that to begin with, but that was your choice. If someone responded that firmly in the negative, I'd probably back up and say, "Sounds like you've had some negative church experiences." Bear in mind that in the deli line, you're not going to have all day long to psychoanalyze the person.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #286

    Apr 14, 2021, 12:48 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by jlisenbe View Post
    This was the situation you presented. "Pretend you met me for the first time at the grocery store. We discovered, while standing in line at the deli, that we live on the same street and know some of the same people. You asked me if I attend any church. I vigorously shake my head "no" and say, "Yuk!" Walter, what would you say to me in response?"

    Already, in your scenario, your rule has been broken. "You asked me if I attend any church." Certainly not an "I" statement and about as nosy as it gets, so you've already let the cat out of the bag. I wouldn't ask that to begin with, but that was your choice. If someone responded that firmly in the negative, I'd probably back up and say, "Sounds like you've had some negative church experiences." Bear in mind that in the deli line, you're not going to have all day long to psychoanalyze the person.
    I'm impressed that you cracked that one wide open!
    jlisenbe's Avatar
    jlisenbe Posts: 5,019, Reputation: 157
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    #287

    Apr 14, 2021, 12:54 PM
    I talk with people a lot and that includes strangers out in the public. I used the method Jesus used with the woman at the well. Ask something of interest to them and see if they respond with any interest.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #288

    Apr 14, 2021, 01:03 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by jlisenbe View Post
    I talk with people a lot and that includes strangers out in the public. I used the method Jesus used with the woman at the well. Ask something of interest to them and see if they respond with any interest.
    "Ask something that might be of interest to them..."
    jlisenbe's Avatar
    jlisenbe Posts: 5,019, Reputation: 157
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    #289

    Apr 14, 2021, 02:00 PM
    "Ask something that might be of interest to them..."
    OK Ms. Nit Pick.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #290

    Apr 14, 2021, 02:18 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by jlisenbe View Post
    OK Ms. Nit Pick.
    You bolded too many words.
    waltero's Avatar
    waltero Posts: 620, Reputation: 5
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    #291

    Apr 14, 2021, 04:54 PM
    If you follow The Christ as your savior, why then are you not a Jew as he was, or did I miss his conversion?
    Not so much Follow. It is not I but Christ in me. I could become anything I wish, wouldn't change a thing...I'd still be a sinner.

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