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    sandhiyakumar6's Avatar
    sandhiyakumar6 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Oct 7, 2016, 04:20 AM
    Marriage
    Asalamu alaikum
    One of my friend she reverted in Islam becoz of her family she married non Muslim men. But she don't have any contact with that men. Now she is work with me . She in love with one Muslim men .they are loving each other one point of stituation they both did mistake.she conceived but that Muslim men gave his words I promise sure I will be with for your rest of your life please avoid this baby . It's nt halal . Allah will ask question . Please avoid this baby. Wallah sure I will be with you like hAlal life. Becoz of his words an promise she aborted that baby. After few days he didn't talk properly with my friend. He block all his social media. They both working same place. But he didn't talk to her any more. Finally my friend ask him . Y your doing like this . Y your avoiding me.? he replied my family won't accept an we are not sutable . My friend she worried more she is crying daily . She is asking forgiveness Allah. She is asking a best solution in religion way . And finally she said becoz of the 2 reason I selected him one I want to be a Muslim . 2 I did mistake I abort my baby . I don't want marry again anyone . I don't want to cheT any one that's y I want to marry same men . Really I don't know what I will give my words to her I need a help

    Walaikum asalam
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
    current pert
     
    #2

    Oct 7, 2016, 05:23 AM
    I'm sorry, I am having a hard time understanding all of your sentences. First, are you saying that she was raised in another religion, and married a man of that religion, but had no contact with him? I do understand the relationship with the Muslim man, the pregnancy, and the abortion.

    If that is true, I don't think there is much advice that strangers online can give, and there are no 'rules' about this. She needs comfort and support, a good friend like you. I will say that I don't think she should think about converting to Islam right now, because it's for all the wrong reasons. She needs to accept that she had an abortion and can't 'undo' it or make desperate changes to make up for it. Having the baby might have been worse for her and for the child. I don't know; no one knows. It wasn't her fault for being so naive about religion, about family pressure, about birth control.

    She needs time to take care of just herself, and not think about marriage. You can help her. She says she doesn't want to marry anyone ever again, but then says something about wanting to marry again? Real life is somewhere in between never and always. Keep encouraging her to work on herself, her job, her interests (outside of romance), her near term future.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #3

    Oct 7, 2016, 05:40 AM
    I think you tell her to forgive herself as she has asked Allah to forgive her, and stay away from this man and move forward in her life. He clearly is not the one to share a life with and she should no longer expect him to be given his actions that don't match his words. It would be very foolish to worry and fret over such a miss judgement in his character that she has madem and she should learn from this mistake and be better, and live better.

    She should also appreciate the gift of the truth that Allah has given her, and not tied her life to such a fellow. Her heart may be hurt now but she has avoided a disaster of a life with a less than honorable fellow who did not care enough for her in the first place.

    She has an opportunity to start fresh and clean in Islam and do this the right way if she so chooses, and that does not depend on the generosity of a lying lover. These are the things you console your distressed friend with. Sorry she had to learn the hard way the folly of putting mind and heart and body before the God she is struggling to understand.

    Good Luck to you and her.
    afaroo's Avatar
    afaroo Posts: 4,006, Reputation: 251
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Oct 7, 2016, 10:17 AM
    Excellent advises from both expert I have no more than that, good luck.

    Talaniman Website would not let me gave you a greene, Thanks

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