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    Krs's Avatar
    Krs Posts: 2,906, Reputation: 320
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    #21

    Aug 29, 2016, 04:42 AM
    I don't enjoy it. Far from it. I have had to my eye balls and have told her I am not interested anymore yet she still does. I want to keep my distance but we all have same friends and if we go out we tell all of us..
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #22

    Aug 29, 2016, 07:10 AM
    Do they have kids together or something? I get your loyalty to the "GROUP" of friends, but from her, you definitely need some distance from her whining. She has become a depressing frustrating subject for you, (And probably your friends too!) and that just drags your own emotional well being down since all of you are helpless to change anything about her situation or circumstance. Only she has that power. Be nice if the "GROUP" confronts the problem as one, but obviously that' not happening, so you have no choice but to put a healthy distance between you and her, and unfortunately that applies to your "GROUP" when she, and HER EX(?) are a part of it. At least for a while until YOU can deal with it BETTER.

    Sad yes, but the bottom line is you have to somehow give her, and her issue a rest. Removing yourself is the simple solution yet the hardest to do, short of going off on her, and risk alienating or dividing the GROUP, which is PACK/MOB mentality. It's on YOU to change/adjust your approach to this situation, because she won't. Forget her well being and pay attention to your own.

    I see ALL of you enabling her behavior by tolerating it. Indeed if ALL of you told her to shut the hell up, and stop forcing this ex on you ALL, wouldn't she shut the hell up, or leave the GROUP?
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
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    #23

    Aug 29, 2016, 10:14 AM
    You said you know it's none of your business, but are asking anyway.
    STOP STOP STOP
    You are too deep into this. You keep telling us more. Nothing more matters. She is who she is.
    She's no different from millions of other drama queens. You are no different from millions of friends who have allowed her to drain you dry.
    STOP!
    It's actually all extremely tedious and boring after the 2nd or 3rd story....
    if the subject intrigues you, ask her. She won't tell you the truth because she probably doesn't know the truth.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #24

    Aug 29, 2016, 03:47 PM
    I haven't read the other posts.

    Frankly it doesn't sound like you even like her, or enjoy being around her. There comes a time in life when you realize that not every person in your life, belongs in your life. There comes a time when you decide to surround yourself with people that enrich your life.

    So really, it's up to you to decide if you want her in your life or not. If you don't, then break all contact, and move on. If you do, then you have to accept how she is and live with it, because she won't change, and it's not fair to ask her to change. So you either like her for who and how she is, or you let her go.

    It's really that easy. But if she stays, then stop complaining about her and learn to accept her. In other words, stop complaining and creating drama about her complaints and drama.
    Krs's Avatar
    Krs Posts: 2,906, Reputation: 320
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    #25

    Sep 2, 2016, 01:56 AM
    I only don't because her conversation is one streak and always about herself and her ex

    Apparently last week he was dead to her however tomorrow he's taking her on a mini trip just the two of them.

    Its bananas
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #26

    Sep 2, 2016, 04:40 AM
    KRS, you either like being part of the drama, or you don't. If you don't like it, remove yourself from the situation. It's really that simple.

    You ou can't expect us to keep giving you advice if you are going to continue to pace yourself in this drama.

    Basically, and this is harsh, either do something about it or quit whining and complaining.
    tickle's Avatar
    tickle Posts: 23,796, Reputation: 2674
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    #27

    Sep 2, 2016, 07:26 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by J_9 View Post
    KRS, you either like being part of the drama, or you don't. If you don't like it, remove yourself from the situation. It's really that simple.

    You ou can't expect us to keep giving you advice if you are going to continue to pace yourself in this drama.

    Basically, and this is harsh, either do something about it or quit whining and complaining.
    My answer last time was basically the same; he seemingly enjoyed the drama she presented. He needs to get a life and distance himself from this friend.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #28

    Sep 2, 2016, 07:36 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by tickle View Post
    My answer last time was basically the same; he seemingly enjoyed the drama she presented. He needs to get a life and distance himself from this friend.
    SHE. This is a female and many years ago was one of our "relationship experts." KRS is a woman, not a man.
    tickle's Avatar
    tickle Posts: 23,796, Reputation: 2674
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    #29

    Sep 2, 2016, 08:06 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by J_9 View Post
    SHE. This is a female and many years ago was one of our "relationship experts." KRS is a woman, not a man.
    OKAY still the same advice. Drama is drama no matter who is involved.I guess I didnt know that ten years ago.

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