[Silvermist]

My mum has been acting really strange the past week. My mum and I don't talk a lot she is very busy working to be able to look after us, I don't mind I'm not much of a talker anyway. But this past week she has been talking to me and asking me question every opportunity she gets. I find it a bit strange. Does she want something? I don't know what to think. I don't know how to interact with her I don't want to be rude I try to answer her questions but she keeps on going. Do you think she is just trying to make conversation or is she trying to interrogate me? I know it may sound like a stupid question and your not my mum so you couldn't know what she is thinking but maybe your someone's mum and might be able to give me some insight to how you all think because I'm confussed.

[Alty]

As a mom of two teenagers aged 13 and 17, I talk to them all the time, even when I'm busy. I talk to them because I enjoy being around them and listening to what they think. I talk to them to find out how they're doing with school, friends. I talk to them to find out how they're feeling about things going on in their lives. I talk to them just to talk. I talk to them to have debates about things we see going on in the world. I love to talk to them, they're fascinating people and I'm so happy to have them in my life.

Maybe your mom just wants to talk to you because she doesn't get a lot of chances to do so.

How old are you?

[ma0641]

I looked over all your previous posts and it appears you have had similar incidents with your brother and mother. Leaving the house, school problems etc. Might I suggest you look them over too. Did you ever go to counseling? Maybe it's not other people.

[Homegirl 50]

Maybe your mom has realized that as busy as she is , she is not spending enough time with you. Don't question it, enjoy it.

[Silvermist]

How old are you?

I'm 14

[Silvermist]

I looked over all your previous posts and it appears you have had similar incidents with your brother and mother. Leaving the house, school problems etc. Might I suggest you look them over too. Did you ever go to counseling? Maybe it's not other people.

Yes I did attend counselling for a while wasn't really my thing too much talking. It is maybe just me it seems maybe a normal thing mums talking heaps and asking questions.

[Silvermist]

Maybe your mom has realized that as busy as she is , she is not spending enough time with you. Don't question it, enjoy it.

Do you think she is trying hard because she feels guilty because I don't want her to feel like that I don't mind that she's hardly around and she must be extreamly exhausted. I really don't mind. I cant help but question but ill try not to

[Precious7]

May be communicate with your mom, Tell her that how you understand that she does a lot of work and sometimes doesn't have time to spend together but how you appreciate these moments and you like these time of togetherness. So, if you think she is feeling guilty, these conversation will ease her.
But I don't think so she is doing because she feels guilty, but she is doing because she wasn't able to do it before, but now she has worked on her plans and priorities and made some adjustments to spend some more time with her children.

[Alty]

Do you think she is trying hard because she feels guilty because I don't want her to feel like that I don't mind that she's hardly around and she must be extreamly exhausted. I really don't mind. I cant help but question but ill try not to

Are you still smoking and doing drugs, and staying away from home? Is that still a concern? If so, maybe she realizes that she needs to be far more present in your life and she needs to ask more questions because she knows you're going down a wrong path.

She works hard, and she has to do that so that she can keep a roof over your head, electricity, water, food. It is exhausting to be the only parent to provide for your kids. It doesn't help when your teenager does nothing to help you. Just saying.

[smoothy]

Are you still smoking and doing drugs, and staying away from home? Is that still a concern? If so, maybe she realizes that she needs to be far more present in your life and she needs to ask more questions because she knows you're going down a wrong path.

She works hard, and she has to do that so that she can keep a roof over your head, electricity, water, food. It is exhausting to be the only parent to provide for your kids. It doesn't help when your teenager does nothing to help you. Just saying.

Completely agree with Alty... almost without exception, EVERY 14 year old I knew that was smoking, doing drugs and staying away from home... right now is either #1 Dead, #2 In jail, or #3 Barely able to make a living and lives in a pig Stye.

Your mother most likely knows this too.

You have a few short years to get your act together and turn your life around, because you will be on your own living in the mess of your own creation.

And as mentioned... its hard making ends meet with TWO working parents, with ONE parent its significantly harder.

All that stuff is very weighing on the conscience of your parent or parents. Because they KNOW where you are heading because they have the life experience to know, and like most of us adults... have known others like you.

If that comes across as a bit Blunt... its because its true. Actions have consequences. Sometimes very, very harsh ones.

I can only hope you have been making significant improvements in your actions and choices... the world is NOT the same as it is for a child... when you become an adult... nobody cares to hear excuses. You are expected to do everything in a socially acceptable manner. Or there will be repercussions.

Doing your own thing in your own way might sound all well and good, only that it comes at a price. One that can be very, very steep depending on what that might be.

[Silvermist]

No I'm not smoking sneaking out, I've been attending all my classes.I realise how exhausting it must be for her doing everything on her own I try to help out where I can dishes laundry tidying up after myself. I don't want to add any extra stress to her life. Im trying to talk to her but I really don't know what to say I've never really seen much of my mum she was always at work by the time I got home and I left for school before she got home. I need the dummies guide to understanding and communicating with mums lol.

[Precious7]

Yea, Start by saying/asking, thank you mom whenever you can, That was helpful or thoughtful, let me know if you need any help, how are you doing, how was your day, can I share what happened today at my school, etc etc. I can go on and on. Start your communication steadily so that it may lead to that comfort zone between both of you where you can ask what you want to ask without feeling uncomfortable.

[Alty]

No I'm not smoking sneaking out, I've been attending all my classes.I realise how exhausting it must be for her doing everything on her own I try to help out where I can dishes laundry tidying up after myself. I don't want to add any extra stress to her life. Im trying to talk to her but I really don't know what to say I've never really seen much of my mum she was always at work by the time I got home and I left for school before she got home. I need the dummies guide to understanding and communicating with mums lol.

Just talk about things you like, things you care about, things you're excited about. My almost 14 year old daughter and I have many shared interests. Gilmore Girls (it's a show currently on Netflix), is our favorite show of all times, and we love to watch it. Actually, watching it would probably help you with the mother daughter dynamic since it's about a mom and her daughter.

We love to do crafts together, sew together, knit together. Sometimes we'll just talk about random things we've seen or heard.

Does your mom have any hobbies, and shows she really likes, any favorite books? What does she do when she's not working or taking care of the family? What are things you like to do, read, watch?