[Loner_7]

I am only 15 so I don't really know much about relationships but my boyfriend of one month cheated on me. I had liked him for a long time and we were friends. However about a week ago I went to his house and saw him in bed with my ex best friend. I was mad and upset so I immediately broke up with him. I know I'm quite young but I did like him quite a lot even though we were only dating for one month and we haven't gotten to that stage in our relationship yet. He knew that my ex best friend has been causing trouble for me at school and he still cheated on me. He said that it was only one time and that I walked in just before they actually did it. But that doesn't change the fact that he cheated on me by kissing her. I admit I didn't realise that he was cheating on me because I always go to his house or him to mine after school.

Ever since I broke up with him, he has been following me around everywhere - in school, after and before. He has been doing sweet things for me leaving sweet letters/poems in my locker, sending me sweet messages and voice mails and even shouted I love you at lunch in front of everybody, even though I don't think he means it yet. I feel guilty for just running out and ignoring him but I don't want to take him back because of the betrayal I feel.

This might be just a regular teenage life with teenage drama but I normally feel helpless and turn to strangers for help. People are telling me that I should forgive him even though we haven't been dating long before we broke up and that he truly loves me even if we're young and others say that I made the right decision and that I'm young and my true love isn't going to be here yet.

So my question is should I take him back? I'm not sure if I can trust him, I mean it has only been a month that we dated who knows if I didn't catch him then that he would continue on cheating on me.

Thank you for reading and giving me advice. Thanks.

[talaniman]

You are probably right, you may never trust him again, so tell him that, and that you are just not ready to forgive, and go back to the blind dumb trusting young teen love you had before, no matter how much he follows you around and shouts from the roof tops. He wasn't honest, but you should be. Fact is you need time to heal and get over this, so forget what everyone else says about YOUR business, take all the time you need. What's the hurry?

Hopefully you both learn from this.

[catonsville]

You have to ask yourself, are you really better than he is. Or are you going to wind up in the sack with this "sad sack"? If your answer is yes, then kick this creep to the curb. If your answer is no, then you will end up in the sack and possibly pregnant.

[CravenMorhead]

I am only 15 so I don't really know much about relationships but my boyfriend of one month cheated on me.

<snipped for length>

So my question is should I take him back? I'm not sure if I can trust him, I mean it has only been a month that we dated who knows if I didn't catch him then that he would continue on cheating on me.

Thank you for reading and giving me advice. Thanks.

No. You shouldn't. You can't trust him. It was only 1 month. That, even in the adult speed dating world, is still the "Get to know you" phase to ensure that you're compatible. There are a couple factors at play here. First being your age and the probably environment that you're in right now. You're 15, which is REALLY young, and you're in high school which is a hot house of hormones and kids trying to find their physical, mental, emotional, and sexual selves. These two factors lead to relationships that are often doomed to failure because they're not really based on anything more then forced familiarity. All you all are friends because of geographical position rather then common interest. You will find this out when you get out of school. It isn't a bad thing, it just means forced social experience and learning. Which you're doing right now.

The second factor at play here is that you caught him, I wouldn't say cheating, but in your mind he was. There is an adage, "Once a cheater, always a cheater" I don't believe this is a hard and fast rule but people will tend to figure out what they can get away with and once they've figured that out they will continue to try to get away with that. For example, if you knew you could take two donuts when they free in the office kitchen instead of one and no one would know then chances are you would take two even knowing it was wrong. You can try to stop but you know there was no consquences. Which brings me my next point. He got caught. He is facing the consquences. He is hoping that this is a quick fix but he needs to learn that not everything that is broken can be fixed. He will take that to mean that when ever he screws up he can make a token gesture and BAM he's back in the good books. Life doesn't work that way.

I think the best thing for you is to sit him down and talk to him. Re-enforce the fact that the relationship is over and tell him why. Tell him that this is UNWANTED attention. There is a tonne here for you to learn but you need to specifically sit down and reflect upon this. It is all a part of becoming a functional adult in this crazy modern world.

[Homegirl 50]

Leave the kid alone. He needs to learn a smile and I love you does not make wrong doing OK.

You've only dated this kid a month, there is no history here. You said you were friends first, but your friend just made out with your enemy.
This guy is not worth it. Next year there will be someone else. Don't start a pattern so young in life of letting people disrespect you