[Hollz]

Hi,
Both of my grandparents on my dad's side are dead and my grandpa on my mums side is too. My Granny died when I was about 2 months and my Grandpa died when I was 7 and my other grandpa died in January this year.
I want to get them all Christmas present. My Granny and Grandpa share a plaque so it would have to fit into a flower holder and my other Grandpa has a grave, so it could possibly be a bit bigger. I was thinking something like a mini letter or note in a bottle from not on the high street, but I have no idea what to put on them. I would love to get my grandpas a mini bottle of their favorite whiskey, but I'm only 13 so I'm not old enough to buy it.
Any gift suggestions or ideas on what I could write on the note/mini letter would be a massive help.

Thank you xx

[joypulv]

You have one grandmother? Ask her to write a little tiny letter with you. Things like this come from the heart, as do the ideas to start them and create them.

[Cat1864]

One of the first things you need to do is find out if the cemetery has rules about what can be left on gravesites. Some places limit 'gifts' to flower arrangements and anything else will removed.

Have you told your parents what you would like to do? Do they have any suggestions?

Other thoughts of what you might think about are based in the belief that they are still with you in spirit and you can give them a gift or do something for them at other locations than the gravesite. Donate to a favored charity. Participate in a hobby or activity that they liked. Make ornaments to put on the tree to remember them. I think you get the idea.

[Wondergirl]

I like Cat1864's idea about making Christmas ornaments. Did each of your grandparents have a special talent or hobby? If I were making ornaments for my parents, the one for my mom might be a rolling pin or a little stove or a fake chocolate cake since she loved to bake. One for my dad might be a small Bible or a little Gothic church since he was a Lutheran pastor, plus he loved baseball and golf. I would include other sibs and family members to help me so the ornaments would be a family project and more meaningful. You could do this once a year and have a special grandparents tree.

After my dad died (my mom is still alive), we kids and grandkids put together a book about him with funny stories and memories and drawings. The grandchildren did the art on the back and front covers. Every person in the family who wanted one got one.

Or, how about planting a memory garden. Seeds aren't expensive, and you can plant shoots/saplings that will grow into bushes and even trees. Of course, you'll need help with this project.

[Alty]

When my parents died, the first Christmas we bought a dozen helium filled balloons, attached a letter and let it fly. Didn't work out so well because of the temperature where I live. Half the balloons popped in the car. But we still got them on their way with the letter attached. My son still remembers that, and he was 3 at the time.

I also made a scrapbook of my parents so that my kids would be able to know them, their lives, their friends, and to keep their memory alive. That I kept for myself, but it was still in many ways a gift to them.

While in Germany, after my mom died (she died 6 months after my dad) we found a shop that does wood burning. They have many designs of wood to choose from, some cut, sanded, and routered, others cut straight off a log, bark still attached. The lady that did the wood burning also painted. We got a plaque that said "In memory of my parents" (won't post their names here) and she painted beautiful flowers right next to it. I still cherish that.

Another idea I love is a time capsule. Put items that remind you of them, pictures of them, things they cherished, bury it and then leave it for 25 years. Just remember that if you move, you should take it with you. There are also time capsules you can buy that you don't need to bury. Just fill them, put them somewhere safe, and 25 years (or whatever time frame you decide on) from now, you and your kids and other family, will be able to look and reminisce.

Keep in mind that buying them a gift really won't matter to them. Do something that means something to you, in memory of them.