[melanie933]

I began working with a guitarist recently on an acoustic act.. at first he was nice and things seemed OK... but shortly, he began doing weird crazy things to almost drain me.. just lots of things. Every time now he does things to drain me, take my energy, and even take the spotlight. He began posting videos of me where I looked bad and he looked good. He made a website for himself while we are a band. He makes lots of crazy noises to drain me or take my energy... after practice sessions I'm left drained and sick...

today was the worst... he sang for over an hour--he's a guitarist.. sure I was getting music from him. I let him sing... I never got in his way. However, I only sang for like 10 minutes. I'm the singer! He BELTS out music randomly and not only is it annoying, its DRAINING and sounds horrible.. he does it on purpose.. in fact the whole time he is there he DRAINS me its insane.. he used to be into the occult and is an energy type jerk... I asked him to pleaes stop singing so much.. its getting annoying... he sings and plays guitar non-stop.. UNNECESSARILY... if I'm talking ot him.. he'll start doing things to ignore/distract me, he even plays the guitar while I'm talking ot him.. he does EVERYTHING to drain the crap out of me. Finally he played ONE last song.. and SANG... AGAIN then BOLTED out of there because he took ALL my energy then!! He didn't even say bye! I left sick drained irritated... he's really psycho. I don't know how to deal with this or what to do about it. I am so sick and drained my head hurts terribly.. ive asked him many times to please stop or don't do that and he keeps doing it.. he is being sadistic and it seems I won't be able to work with him... if I even move, go to the other room he seems to get irritated at ANY MOVE I MAKE and he begins making loud noises, singing, acting irritated.. huh? He's crazy.. he also seems jealous that I'm the sniger and has said "well guess u want to be in the spotlight" or "im just the lowly guitarist" and its like he tries ot take my ENERGY and use it for HIMSELF to sing? He messes with my singing voice constantly.. he wants to take the spotlight himself.. how can a guitarist sing for TWO HOURS non-stop??

[melanie933]

Adding more to this... what he did was unforgivable almost.. and he did it in a very cruel sadistic way.. every minute he's in my presence he literally does crazy weird things and is draining or rude or weird. He seems to feel entitled to mistreating me this way and I've asked him MANY times to stop and he keeps getting worse.. if I ask him to not sing so much as he sang the ENTIRE TIME he sings more and more.. and he's a HORRIBLE singer and I'm the singer? He's literally trying to take my place he's a whackjob. If I sing good he seems irritated and will try to mess up the guitar, do over the song, or even strum too loud or too soft... his abuse is getting more extreme and worse... I've only known him three-four weeks.. first two weeks he was fine.. now he's getting crazy... all he did was play guitar and sing for hours.. I'm like what? Then I went into the other room because I was coughing and he began BELTING out more music and I felt even sicker... he is a weird shy sissy type! You can tell he's this submissive weirdo yet he's trying to dominate and terrorize me? If I talk he seems IRRITATED I'm speaking and will begin doing things and ignoring me or being rude.. how can someone deal with this pathetic loser



He also seems really jealous.. he has said that I'm beautiful and a good singer and I can find someone better than him.. I told him he's good.. and I'm trying hard to form a real group and do something... his only interest seems to be in draining me and treating me like crap... I don't know how to deal with this lunatic he's crazy.. and I'm sure he's a sociopath of some sorts...

[Fr_Chuck]

Is it his "band" and it sounds like you are working for him, not with him.

In the band, someone is in charge, who is it.

[mogrann]

What you do is sit down and make a decision. Some choices would be
1. Do nothing and allow this to conitinue
2. Talk to the member and come to an agreement
3. Quit the band


Your decision on what you do. You can not force someone to change but you can change how you react or if they are in your life.

[odinn7]

You say you started working with him but how? Is there a contract? Have the two of you performed anywhere?

Seems to me the answer to all of your problems is pretty simple....tell him it's over and then you find someone else.