Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    Mad n mississip's Avatar
    Mad n mississip Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Sep 15, 2013, 10:10 PM
    My boyfriend is just not that into me
    I've been with my boyfriend for 8 years and we have had more bad times than good , in last past year we had a son , my first , and his 8th . We have lived together on and off over the years but since my son was born we have been living with our parents until finances are better . We rarely communicate or talk , he comes around on a daily basis for a few minutes and then he's gone with his friends for the most part of the day , unless I starting complaining about it , then he will straighten up and back to the same ole thing . We say we are getting married but I have no ring , and I just do t believe a word he says anymore . I really want yo be done with him . But I'm so scared of ending up alone . I know it's pothetic but . Guys are not the same any more they won't someone to take care if them , n I don't want get into anymore relationships were I got to play somebody's Moma . I just confused I love this guy buy its never going to change . What should I do
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
    Expert
     
    #2

    Sep 15, 2013, 10:13 PM
    You actually had a child with a man who had 7 already? That alone should speak for him being responsible.

    No, it's not going to change. It didn't change for the other baby mama's it's not going to change for you.

    What should you do? Go to court, if you haven't already, and file for child support and move on so that you don't raise your child to believe that a man having 8 children by different mothers is the norm. It's not.
    Mad n mississip's Avatar
    Mad n mississip Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #3

    Sep 15, 2013, 10:43 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by J_9 View Post
    You actually had a child with a man who had 7 already? That alone should speak for him being responsible.

    No, it's not going to change. It didn't change for the other baby mama's it's not going to change for you.

    What should you do? Go to court, if you haven't already, and file for child support and move on so that you don't raise your child to believe that a man having 8 children by different mothers is the norm. It's not.
    Thank u , I just building up the courage to leave and stay gone
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
    current pert
     
    #4

    Sep 16, 2013, 04:39 AM
    Living with 'our' parents? You go to his one month and yours the next?
    Kick him out 100% if it's your parents.
    As J-9 said, start the mechanical process. It will give you something solid to do.
    You aren't alone if you have family and your child. He should get visitation of course. You will have to allow for that and not put him down as the child grows.
    Now is not the time to be thinking about replacing him. Learn to be without a man for several years. It will make you strong.
    Oliver2011's Avatar
    Oliver2011 Posts: 2,606, Reputation: 746
    Ultra Member
     
    #5

    Sep 16, 2013, 07:44 AM
    Fathering 8 children is irresponsible.

    "until finances are better" - does he pay child support for the other 7 or do tax payers have to pay for his family?

    "then he's gone with his friends for the most part of the day" - What about him getting a job so that he can be responsible for his children?

    Over the past 8 years he has shown you very clearly his behavior patterns. I am guessing they generally get no better. Settling for this bum because you don't want to end up alone is not the right answer for you. Find a man to date instead of this child you are currently dating.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
    Uber Member
     
    #6

    Sep 16, 2013, 08:15 AM
    He's not into you. Look at his track record,not what you thought things were. Do not make any excuses for sticking with him, not even for the sake of the baby. You will ne much more at peace being without him, you just got to get use to it.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #7

    Sep 16, 2013, 01:39 PM
    Sounds like he's taking you for granted and no longer taking you seriously. If he's not willing to work on the relationship then why stay in it?

    When you say you still love him, what do you love about him? It doesn't sound like there's much to love if he's not around. Are you sure you don't love someone he's not?

    If things don't get better soon, what's the point of hanging on? You'd only be hanging on to something that may never happen (for him to change). I would say rid yourself of the misery and have a clean slate.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

Boyfriend working overseas, How can I make things easier for myself and my boyfriend? [ 1 Answers ]

My boyfriend has had to move back home to work. Basically, so he can get some money together for a deposit on his own place back in London. It's overseas, so its both difficult and expensive to see each other. It's only 3-4 months, which in the bigger picture isn't really all that long, but he's...

My boyfriend mom told me today that my boyfriend was molested as a child [ 4 Answers ]

She asked me to keep it to myself till he tells me one day, we both started to cry, and she feels angry because she didn't know, and if she could, would want to file a late rape charge. It hurts, and I wish he could tell me, and know that I love him no matter what. He recently about 4 months...

Does my Boyfriend love me Is my boyfriend a gold digger he lives thirty minutes away. [ 5 Answers ]

Okay. Before I met this guy I was in a relationship with a guy who I was with for almost a year until we broke up on oct 9th 2010 then I met this guy name lawrence on oct 12th 2010 he approached me on Facebook I was very doubtful of me and him starting a relationship since I just got my...


View more questions Search