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Gangster1 · May 29, 2013, 12:22 PM

After a month and a half of no contact ex girlfriend initiated contact. The reason why was because I was acting to needy and desperate. It's been a week that we have kept in touch with two days of contact in between. Conversation have gone smooth and friendly except for a text from her saying sorry she doesn't want to get me in trouble with my girl for texting. What does this mean? I replied to her I don't have a girl. Monday morning at 9 am she sent a message saying "hey" five minutes after that I replied the same. She didn't reply to that the whole day. Why?. How should I tell her I'm interested without looking to needy or desperate ? Wait a couple of more days to text her or wait for her? She was the one who broke up with me.

Oliver2011 · May 30, 2013, 04:51 AM

First off know that "needy" and "desperate" in a relationship is never attractive. It also scares people off. If you end up back in a relationship with her, how have you fixed it where you aren't going to be needy and desperate? Because that is what she is going to want to see. My guess is you haven't done anything to fix that issue.

Gangster1 · May 30, 2013, 10:30 AM

Originally Posted by Oliver2011

First off know that "needy" and "desperate" in a relationship is never attractive. It also scares people off. If you end up back in a relationship with her, how have you fixed it where you aren't going to be needy and desperate? Because that is what she is going to want to see. My guess is you haven't done anything to fix that issue.

I am aware of that trait on me. One thin I have Done is not texting her and calling her all the time. The times we have texted I have kept them short and friendly. Just casual textes. Before I was asking her all sort of questions to every of her textes. I think the last message she sent was to quick that I responded too.

Last time we texted was Monday morning

Oliver2011 · May 30, 2013, 10:37 AM

Originally Posted by Gangster1

I meant to say that I haven't text or call too much as before. Last time we texted was Monday morning

That is because you are on the outside looking in. If you do get back into a relationship don't let the annoying traits creep back in. I still think you should take some time and enjoy being single for a while. Let her make the move.

talaniman · May 30, 2013, 10:57 AM

She dumped you, let her lead. Is there a way to communicate besides texting?

Gangster1 · May 30, 2013, 11:00 AM

Originally Posted by Oliver2011

That is because you are on the outside looking in. If you do get back into a relationship don't let the annoying traits creep back in. I still think you should take some time and enjoy being single for a while. Let her make the move.

That's what I'm working on. I'm keeping myself busy at the gym, I might get a weekend job. Basically just living life myself making myself happy without her. How do I show her I'm interested while not looking desperate? I was thinking give her a call Saturday afternoon since the last time we talk was Monday morning.

Gangster1 · May 30, 2013, 11:03 AM

Originally Posted by talaniman

She dumped you, let her lead. Is there a way to communicate besides texting?

Yes there is. I can call her, that's not a problem. I think she should be the making the moves since she was the one that ended. How do I show her I'm interested without looking desperate? I was thinking to call her Saturday afternoon

talaniman · May 30, 2013, 11:24 AM

How old are you both because for teens games are often played that involve keeping some one they once dated or had a relationship with in their lives as a friend, or text buddy or whatever and not knowing her motives your interest may be misplaced or affirm you are okay with text buddy friend.

You either ask her directly to clear the air and protect yourself, or you let her do the make up chase herself. I don't going for the chit chat small talk and getting false hope if all she wants is a conversation buddy. The sooner you know what's on her mind the quicker you know what to do.

Don't forget, you got dumped and surely don't want to get dumped again, at least by her. I have always never gone back after being dumped, no matter the love or feelings because it's a lousy substitute for honest communications.

That's why your ages are important. As well as is this any of the other females of the past posts?

patnatwilla · Jun 1, 2013, 11:20 PM

Wanting someone back isn't being needy or desperate. It's called being in love. If you like her that much then you should take a while to rebuild your friendship and then make your move. It's worked for me in the past, and I can almost guarantee it'll work for you.