[talaniman]

A Good Pun is Its Own Reword

- A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.

- Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.

- Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

- A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

- Sea captains don't like crew cuts.

- Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

- Reading while sunbathing makes you well-red.

- When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.

- A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.

- What's the definition of a will? (Come on, It's a dead giveaway!)

- A backward poet writes inverse.





Top Reasons For Joining The Church Choir

- You're running out of clean clothes and the robe saves on laundry.

- The church is usually crowded and you want to make sure you always have a seat.

- You've just been selected for jury duty and you want to get use to sitting with a large group of people.

- The collection plate is never passed to the choir.

- There's a clock in the back of the church and you want to know when one hour has passed.

- For years you have wanted to know who sits in the back of the church but were afraid to turn around and look.

- You've been known to nod off during the service and don't want the minister/priest to catch you.

- The chairs for the choir are padded and are the most comfortable chairs in the church.





You Might Be A Redneck If

- Your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.

- You watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.

- You think the French Riviera is a foreign car.

- You think you are an entrepreneur because of the "Dirt for Sale" sign in the front yard.

- You're still scalping tickets after the concert is over.

- You don't think Jeff's Foxworthy's jokes are funny.

- Every time you see a roadsign that says "DIP" you reach in your back pocket.

- You've ever had Thanksgiving dinner on a Ping-Pong table.

[laxmasta900]

Lol, I got that same email forwarded from a friend.

[talaniman]

Uh oh! You aren't in my New world Circle are you?

[tinsign]

Thanks for the smiles :D