[confidential19]

Hi, I'm 20 years old and I'm in love with a lesbian. I'm really confused. To help you understand the story, I'll give you background information. She and I originally met online. She was using the picture of a boy. For over a year I was under the impression that she was a guy. We talked every single day. We started to text, talk on the phone, and eventually we fell in love. One day, I started to hound her about why we haven't skyped yet and finally she told the truth and admitted she was a girl. At first, I was really upset. I felt so betrayed. Especially since she know I was straight. Yet, since such an emotional attachment had been made, I didn't want her to go away. She's become one of my closest friends. When I'm upset she calls me to make me feel better, she makes me feel beautiful and smart. We listen to each other. When it comes to guys, I've never had much luck. Boys I've liked have usually never liked me back or if a guy did like me, I wouldn't like him. I still look at boys and find them attractive. I'm not attracted to girls. I don't see girls and think about them. If this were to end I'd never look at another girl. It's just her. I don't know what to do because I'm not sure if I just haven't made the connection yet that she's actually a girl? We've skyped and we Facebook. I think about her sexually kind of. I don't necessarily find the female body sexual appealing, I just want her to be happy so I feel it's the right thing to do. She makes me smile and in my heart she's who I want. I just since I'm not attracted to any other girls, still find guys attractive, and can't bring myself to be "lesbian" know what I should do. I also struggle with this religiously. I'm asking because I do not want to hurt her. Not at all. She's the most amazing person I know, but the thought of being without her or being with someone else breaks my heart. Am I being selfish, or should I pursue this? I've never been with a guy or girl sexually. Nor have I ever kissed anyone. I don't what I am.

[SydKid157]

You know you could be bi... not saying you are just stating a theroy

[Homegirl 50]

If you know she is straight, why was she talking to you pretending to be a boy?
The fact that she lied about something like that would turn me off completely.
Sounds like you have an emotional attachment to her. What is the deal about not hurting her, she is the one who lied to you. I think you have a crush on her but that does not near you are bi. You have a crush on who you thought she was.

[Fr_Chuck]

Her lying would be a large warning sign and I would not have even looked back.

But have you meet her in person yet, there may be more lies you don't know.

But if you still can't use common sense about her lying and fooling you for this time, When you are young is when you discover who you are, You must have some sexual interest or you would not be giving this a second thought.

If you feel it, sometimes you have to go with the feelings.

[Oliver2011]

Her lying would be a large warning sign and I would not have even looked back.

But have you meet her in person yet, there may be more lies you don't know.

But if you still can't use common sense about her lying and fooling you for this time, When you are young is when you discover who you are, You must have some sexual interest or you would not be giving this a second thought.

If you feel it, sometimes you have to go with the feelings.

I totally agree with the wise Fr_Chuck. Relationships that start with dishonesty are fraught with all kinds of warning signs. Pump up that self esteem and get out of there.

[Homegirl 50]

I misread your question. She knows you are straight and pretended to be a boy. That is so dishonest. Its like she preyed on you. That would make me angry. Make me wonder what else she has lied about. I still think you are attracted to who you thought she was . But do what you feel you need to do.