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bparkman2011 · May 16, 2012, 08:02 AM

I live in Texas, my ex lives in OK. We have 2 daughters. My questions is, we have joint custody, but the girls have not been in her custody or care for 5 months now. Can I pick them up and keep them? As I said they have lived with their moms, parents for 5 months now. Is there any thing I can file such as abandonment on the ex, since she dropped the girls off with her parents 5 months ago, and states, when she gets her crap together, she will get the girls..
They should be with me if they are not with their mother, and she isn't in a hurry to get her crap together to provide for my daughters.

Fr_Chuck · May 16, 2012, 12:22 PM

You have joint, so when do you suppose to have them, but you file for a change in custody, using abandoment as the reason, ask for full custody.

AK lawyer · May 16, 2012, 04:15 PM

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

You have joint, so when do you suppose to have them, but you file for a change in custody, using abandoment as the reason, ask for full custody.

And you would file in the state court where you were divorced.

bparkman2011 · May 17, 2012, 04:50 AM

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

You have joint, so when do you suppose to have them, but you file for a change in custody, using abandoment as the reason, ask for full custody.

I am suppose to have them for 30 days, starting May 18th. I am seeking sole custody, and have filed in Oklahoma, where the girls have lived since Oct 2010.
However, the girls have NOT lived with their mom in over 5 months. They have been living with their grandparents. Shouldn't that be grounds for abandonment, in which I should be allowed to get the girls, and keep them with me, until the final custody hearing?

Fr_Chuck · May 17, 2012, 06:15 AM

Yes it may be grounds not for "criminal" abandonment but for a reason in family court BUT

You have to have a judge declare it, there is no automatic abandonment like this, the mother left children in a safe environment, under the care of another person.

So you when you get the children don't have to return them to anyone but the mother, so you get them and file for custody. You ask for an emergancy order of temp custody till the court case is done.

bparkman2011 · Jun 20, 2012, 08:17 AM

I have heard that in cases of Back child support, that once the child turns 18, the child support stops, and that the child then has to go after the back child support to get it... is this true?
I have 3 daughters, one will turn 18 soon, so will my child support amount drop at that time, and will the kids have to file through court to get any back child support I owe?

Fr_Chuck · Jun 20, 2012, 08:40 AM

No at least in the US or Canada this is not the case, the child has no rights to child support it is always paid to the care giver who it was given to. At 18 in many places they can not longer file for back support if they had never filed.

If you have a child support order in place and owe back support you must keep paying to the other party till the back support is paid, In fact if at 18 current support ends, the other party can file to make you pay more toward back support if there is no current being paid.

Not sure where you heard this, it is not true

bparkman2011 · Jun 20, 2012, 09:08 AM

I have never received divorce papers or any custody papers showing I was ordered by the courts to pay child support, but the child support enforcement agency stepped in and started garnishing my wages years ago. When I call the child support enforcement agency to find out how she was able to get child support without court order, I get the run around and no straight answers. Could she have gone to the agency without court orders to go after me for child support?

ScottGem · Jun 20, 2012, 09:27 AM

First, any question on law needs to include your general locale as laws vary by area.

If the mother applied for public assistance, then they may have ordered support to reimburse the state.

But if you have allowed them to garnish your salary without legal documentation, then you are being foolish. You start, by getting a copy of the order served on your employer. A garnishment order usually has to be issued by a court. So that may give you a case/docket number you can use to get transcripts from the court.

If the garnishment order was not issued by a court, then you need to research the law in your area to see if the agency can issue and order on their own. In any case, you are entitled to copies of legal paperwork.

And you really need to get your information from better sources. I don't know where you heard that back support stops at 18. But I have never heard that and don't believe that is the law anywhere. If an award for support is issued, and you don't pay all you are required to, you accumulate arrears. Arrears can accumulate interest, so the arrears can continue to be collected for as long as they exist. The regular support can stop when the award says it will stop.

bparkman2011 · Jul 30, 2012, 06:11 AM

After a case is dismissed in one county how long do I have to wait to start the case in another county?

Fr_Chuck · Jul 30, 2012, 06:40 AM

What state ? Is this within the same state? What type of case? Is there any other related cases already in the other state besides the one that was dismissed.

Why was it dismissed ?

bparkman2011 · Jul 30, 2012, 07:04 AM

In Oklahoma.. it will be in the same state, no other related cases open. The attorney asked for $7000 or he will withdraw from the case. We can not come up with that kind of money within 2 weeks. We are seeking sole custody of 2 minor children. She moved to another county right before this case was started, and now she has established residency in another county, so we want to move the case to the county she lives in.

bparkman2011 · Jul 30, 2012, 08:53 AM

Is there any such thing as financial assistance for dads who are seeking sole custody of his children? I have to come up with $2500 by the end of August, and that is going to be VERY difficult, as I am house payment, car payment, child support etc to pay also...

bparkman2011 · Aug 9, 2012, 12:35 PM

If I find out my divorce from 13 years ago isn't final, I understand we have to go through the divorce proceedings again, however, if I am remarried, do I have to divorce my current wife as well? Or is that marriage just considered invalid and we have to do it all over again?

Fr_Chuck · Aug 9, 2012, 01:25 PM

If your first marriage was never final, and still valid, that makes you a guilty of bigamy.
The current "new" marriage could be challenged in court since you could not legatlly remarry, you cannot divorce if you were never married. You could get an annulment but really just need to get remarried again.

bparkman2011 · Aug 10, 2012, 06:25 AM

I thought the divorce from 13 yrs ago was final, but just recently found out it isn't. My ex did remarry and got divorced within those 13 yrs. I just remarried a year ago. My ex still claims we are divorced, however, she can't produce a final decree and I can't find one anywhere. All this has taken place in OK and now I am in TX and remarried in TX. Do I need to go to the court house and explain the situation to have my current marriage license removed or something?

bparkman2011 · Aug 10, 2012, 06:27 AM

What would make the marriage from 13 years ago not still valid? She remarried a couple months after our divorce was supposibly final, and she just recently got divorced.

JudyKayTee · Aug 10, 2012, 06:30 AM

Originally Posted by bparkman2011

I thought the divorce from 13 yrs ago was final, but just recently found out it isn't. My ex did remarry and got divorced within those 13 yrs. I just remarried a year ago. My ex still claims we are divorced, however, she can't produce a final decree and I can't find one anywhere. All this has taken place in OK and now I am in TX and remarried in TX. Do I need to go to the court house and explain the situation to have my current marriage license removed or something?

No, you need to contact OK (if that's where you got your divorce) and ask for a copy of the final decree. You very well may have committed bigamy. That means that your current "marriage" is not legal.

You need to find out the status of your first marriage before you can address your second.

bparkman2011 · Aug 10, 2012, 08:17 AM

Thank you for your help...
Now I wonder, how did she get child support, and get it garnished from my wages if it was never ordered by a judge, can that now be disputed? Don't get me wrong I will continue to do my part in taking care of my kids, but how is it that my checks are being garnished and my income tax refunds being taken, if there was never court ordered child support? Can she also be in trouble for getting remarried, even though she just got divorced?

JudyKayTee · Aug 10, 2012, 08:48 AM

Originally Posted by bparkman2011

thank you for your help...
Now I wonder, how did she get child support, and get it garnished from my wages if it was never ordered by a judge, can that now be disputed?? Don't get me wrong I will continue to do my part in taking care of my kids, but how is it that my checks are being garnished and my income tax refunds being taken, if there was never court ordered child support? can she also be in trouble for getting remarried, even though she just got divorced??

It's possible support was ordered on a temporary basis, pending a final Order, and no final Order was never filed.

If child support was not Court ordered she cannot take legal means to collect from you.

There HAD to be Court ordered support if it is being taken out of your check and your IRS refunds are being seized.

Yes, she also committed bigotry.

There is too much going on here, in my opinion, for the divorce to never have been finalized.