[ScottGem]

OK, I want to nip this in bud. I'm not going to kill the previous posts, but I will remove further ones. I believe NDE PTSD is sincere in wanting to help and his belief that he was helping. Unfortunately that belief was misguided because his answers were not up to the standards of this site. We have explained why they weren't and hope that he understands and is more careful in the future to check the accuracy of his responses.

This has happened before. People happen upon this site and are inspired to help. They jump in without spending time browsing around. They blunder by not giving high quality advice because they think they know something from personal experience. Sometimes such people learn when we point out these mistakes and go on to become respected contributors. Other times they leave in a huff. So lets cut the newbie some slack and see which way he goes.

[JudyKayTee]

OK, I want to nip this in bud. I'm not going to kill the previous posts, but I will remove further ones. I believe NDE PTSD is sincere in wanting to help and his belief that he was helping. Unfortunately that belief was misguided because his answers were not up to the standards of this site. We have explained why they weren't and hope that he understands and is more careful in the future to check the accuracy of his responses.

This has happened before. People happen upon this site and are inspired to help. They jump in without spending time browsing around. They blunder by not giving high quality advice because they think they know something from personal experience. Sometimes such people learn when we point out these mistakes and go on to become respected contributors. Other times they leave in a huff. So lets cut the newbie some slack and see which way he goes.

With respect, Scott, the newbie just called me a phony, drug addict and alcoholic.

The good news is I'm 22.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/introd...sd-685566.html

[ScottGem]

With respect, Scott, the newbie just called me a phony, drug addict and alcoholic.

The good news is I'm 22.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/introd...sd-685566.html

Thanks for pointing that out. I've handled that, see that thread.

[AK lawyer]

...
The good news is I'm 22.
...

Perhaps. But you are wise beyond your years. :)

[JudyKayTee]

Judykay, Your 22 years old. I am 50 years old and have life experience. I am only giving my own life experience and these people can take it or leave it. I am not making disrespectful or rude comments. I am not trying to injure or mislead people. I don't know what your problem is with me but please understand I am not trying to do harm.

Couldn't go back and edit - again, let me explain:

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/bereav...-639804-2.html

BrittyC5 said “First off I am so sorry for your loss. I too have just lost my boyfriend of 4 years due to an overdose. He was 23. I am 22"

Judykaytee said “FrChuck's posts on loss always truly bring tears to my eyes. I was widowed and, yes, he's correct - I have never stopped loving my husband. Sometimes I miss him, particularly when I first wake up in the morning. I have moved on. I met someone, fell in love and married again - but one person does not replace another. No one is an expert on grief and grieving. What works for me may very well make the grief worse for you. I found that my grief came in waves - better one day, worse another day, better the next. There were days when I didn't care if the sun ever came up again. I had to force myself to get dressed, go to work, eat. In the beginning every minute was a struggle, then every hour was a struggle, then every day, then every week, then every month - and you get the picture. It does get easier. That doesn't mean it gets better. You've had a terrible loss at a young age. When you lose a partner at any age it doesn't make any sense. I, at least, had a business to run, was established. You, on the other hand, are just starting out. My husband was very sick for a long time, and we had the opportunity to discuss what he wanted for me - I realize you didn't have that opportunity but the advice probably would be the same. You do your boyfriend no respect if you bury yourself (so to speak) with him. You have to go on. All I can tell you is to find what helps you heal - solitude (as much as you can find solitude), keeping busy, perhaps a group, prayer (if you are religious), preserving your memories, contact with his family - whatever works for you. I PROMISE you it will get easier. And, yes, I know - I didn't believe it either.”

Please point out where I said I’m 22 and my husband died a month ago.

I’m not seeing it.

[JudyKayTee]

Perhaps. But you are wise beyond your years. :)

Yes, and I've lived a lifetime and more in those 22 years.

I actually got married when I was minus 3.

[ScottGem]

As we have said NDE misunderstood something he read. Probably the post you are referencing. We all know that (except maybe NDE)

So can we now stop this?

[JudyKayTee]

As we have said NDE misunderstood something he read. Probably the post you are referencing. We all know that (except maybe NDE)

So can we now stop this?

Yep.