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    sarah_ginge23's Avatar
    sarah_ginge23 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 9, 2012, 06:30 PM
    I'm in love with my boss
    I'm in love with my boss, he's twice my age, he's also married with kids,
    I can't help the way I feel about him, he pushes every right button, I melt when I look into his eyes, then there's the but.. I know it can't happen but how the hell do you switch the feelings off? It doesn't help that I'm a heavy drinker, I see him or hear from him, I'm a mess aftawards, I turn to drink to forget but that only makes it worse for me?! Can anyone help with some sound advice?
    C0bra_M3nace's Avatar
    C0bra_M3nace Posts: 1,296, Reputation: 223
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    #2

    Jul 9, 2012, 06:34 PM
    First of all, you need to come back to reality. It isn't hard to just sit down and know that it can never happen. If you can't accept the fact it will never be and move on, then it's your own fault.

    Don't blame your problems on alcohol. Unless you're extremely stupid, you should know that alcohol is just another problem on top of them all.

    Work on knowing the difference between fantasy and reality, then work on that drinking problem.
    Gamed's Avatar
    Gamed Posts: 269, Reputation: 29
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    #3

    Jul 9, 2012, 06:38 PM
    Theirs so many people out their for you don't tie yourself up on 1 person that has a family. Think about the kids and how this would affect their lives if word got out. The fact that you say it can't happen because his family shows me you're a good person that shouldn't have a problem connecting with someone else to clear your mind. Goodluck
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #4

    Jul 9, 2012, 06:40 PM
    Time to change jobs and think about staying sober, getting drunk is never the answer.
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #5

    Jul 10, 2012, 02:49 AM
    Get help sorting out your drink problem-AA and therapy.
    Once you're back on track I think you'll find this ''crush'' will have lost its attraction.
    semiramis78's Avatar
    semiramis78 Posts: 43, Reputation: 4
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    #6

    Jul 10, 2012, 10:19 AM
    If you can't control your feelings, change your boss, I mean change your job!
    C0bra_M3nace's Avatar
    C0bra_M3nace Posts: 1,296, Reputation: 223
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    #7

    Jul 10, 2012, 10:23 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by semiramis78 View Post
    If you can't control your feelings, change your boss, i mean change your job!
    Changing your job in today's economy isn't as easy as it may seem. It's much easier to accept the things you cannot change.
    tickle's Avatar
    tickle Posts: 23,796, Reputation: 2674
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    #8

    Jul 10, 2012, 10:30 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by C0bra_M3nace View Post
    Changing your job in todays economy isn't as easy as it may seem. It's much easier to accept the things you cannot change.
    I don't think that old chestnut 'accept the things you cannot change' is apropos here, my dear CObra. Sometimes you have to take your licks and get out. Especially as an alcoholic has no will of their own (I know I am married to one) no gumption to initiate and know when to make a quick exit.
    C0bra_M3nace's Avatar
    C0bra_M3nace Posts: 1,296, Reputation: 223
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    #9

    Jul 10, 2012, 10:35 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by tickle View Post
    I don't think that old chestnut 'accept the things you cannot change' is apropos here, my dear CObra. Sometimes you have to take your licks and get out. Especially as an alcoholic has no will of their own (I know I am married to one) no gumption to initiate and know when to make a quick exit.
    Oh I know, I never said qutting was never an option. It is easier sometimes to accept. I hear where you are coming from though I know many alcoholics as well.
    semiramis78's Avatar
    semiramis78 Posts: 43, Reputation: 4
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    #10

    Jul 10, 2012, 10:48 AM
    It is easy to accept, only easy to say, when you are not involved in it yourself...
    There is another way, get a holiday for 1-2 months and try to meet others and try to forget him.
    Things will be better when you will be back (based on my own experience! ;) )
    C0bra_M3nace's Avatar
    C0bra_M3nace Posts: 1,296, Reputation: 223
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    #11

    Jul 10, 2012, 10:54 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by semiramis78 View Post
    it is easy to accept, only easy to say, when you are not involved in it yourself...
    there is another way, get a holiday for 1-2 months and try to meet others and try to forget him.
    things will be better when you will be back (based on my own experience! ;) )
    You tell me that as if I haven't experienced it in my life. I have, many times and survived without turning to alcohol.

    It sure is easier said than done, but it's only as hard as you make it.
    semiramis78's Avatar
    semiramis78 Posts: 43, Reputation: 4
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    #12

    Jul 10, 2012, 11:54 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by C0bra_M3nace View Post
    You tell me that as if I havn't experienced it in my life. I have, many times and survived without turning to alcohol.

    It sure is easier said than done, but it's only as hard as you make it.
    Do you have experience to be in love with your boss? And then you have to see him everyday and respect him..! What I mean is "out of sight out of mind".
    tickle's Avatar
    tickle Posts: 23,796, Reputation: 2674
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    #13

    Jul 10, 2012, 12:06 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by semiramis78 View Post
    do you have experience to be in love with your boss? and then you have to see him everyday and respect him ...!? what I mean is "out of sight out of mind".
    I only half agree, in essence 'out of sight out of mind' will work for most people, but not when she starts drinking.
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