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zraii · Jun 21, 2012, 10:39 AM

My marriage and divorce was in Texas. I left the father when the child was 15 months old. It has been 4 years now and the father has never contacted us or seen the child. I have not asked for child support, nor has he paid any though it has been ordered by the court. I do not want his money, by the way.

What I do want is to terminate his rights without making any contact with him. Is this possible? I have very personal reasons for not wanting to ever contact this man, unless through an attorney or unless I absolutely have to.

Since the father has not used any right to visitation (I have full custody/conservatorship, he is basically a legal guardian) or paid any child support, is it possible to have his rights terminated?

I am not looking to have my son adopted at this time. I would like to perhaps look into moving to another country but with the father in the picture legally, I would not be able to leave the country. At this moment in time, I can not even get my child a passport.

I appreciate any and all advice anyone can give me. Thank you so much.

smoothy · Jun 21, 2012, 10:40 AM

Originally Posted by zraii

My marriage and divorce was in Texas. I left the father when the child was 15 months old. It has been 4 years now and the father has never contacted us or seen the child. I have not asked for child support, nor has he paid any though it has been ordered by the court. I do not want his money, by the way.

What I do want is to terminate his rights without making any contact with him. Is this possible? I have very personal reasons for not wanting to ever contact this man, unless through an attorney or unless I absolutely have to.

Since the father has not used any right to visitation (I have full custody/conservatorship, he is basically a legal guardian) or paid any child support, is it possible to have his rights terminated?

I am not looking to have my son adopted at this time. I would like to perhaps look into moving to another country but with the father in the picture legally, I would not be able to leave the country. At this moment in time, I can not even get my child a passport.

I appreciate any and all advice anyone can give me. Thank you so much.

Simple answer... NO. He is legally the father until there is an adoption... like it or not.

zraii · Jun 21, 2012, 10:42 AM

One thing I'd like to add - when we went into the divorce proceedings, we both asked the judge to terminate his rights. We both wanted this. The judge did not grant it because he felt that my ex would get off scott-free, without understanding the entire situation.

I know my ex would likely agree 4 years later to sign off, if it is somehow possible.

Thank you.

zraii · Jun 21, 2012, 10:42 AM

Originally Posted by smoothy

Simple answer.....NO. He is legally the father until there is an adoption...like it or not.

How's that possible when the judge considered it in our case?

smoothy · Jun 21, 2012, 10:53 AM

Originally Posted by zraii

hows that possible when the judge considered it in our case?

I don't think so... you only think that... they don't take away rights without giving them to someone else... I.E. adoption,

That's so YOU don't end up on welfare while he gets off without paying support. Leaving the taxpayers getting screwed. Children are not property... and the courts know this.

zraii · Jun 21, 2012, 10:55 AM

Originally Posted by smoothy

I don't think so....you only think that...they don't take away right without giving them to someone else....

so YOU don't end up on welfare and he get off without paying support.

Children are not property.....

The child had an ad litem attorney because we specifically asked for termination of parental rights. The lawyers met on this more than once. Its not just a thought or opinion - the major part of the divorce was the termination of parental rights.

smoothy · Jun 21, 2012, 11:01 AM

Originally Posted by zraii

The child had an ad litem attorney because we specifically asked for termination of parental rights. the lawyers met on this more than once. its not just a thought or opinion - the major part of the divorce was the termination of parental rights.

Then present a link that shows how that can be legally done... and what legal codes permit it and when...

Because the reality is the courts of the USA which you are in... will not terminate the rights of a parent that is NOT serious threat to the child for the convienience of the other parent unless there is an adoption involved.

zraii · Jun 21, 2012, 11:04 AM

Texas Family Code - Chapter 161 Termination Of The Parent-Child Relationship - Texas Attorney Resources - Texas Laws

There's a lot there, but I was hoping for someone to advise me who's been through something similar. I appreciate your feedback, smoothy. Perhaps I can get another perspective through someone else too.

ScottGem · Jun 21, 2012, 11:17 AM

Yes the court may have considered it and yes the law allows the court to consider it. But the fact is they didn't do it, did they? That's because even though some areas permit it the mood of the courts are not to do it unless the parent is a danger to the child or to make way for an adoption.

The law says a court MAY grant a termination. In other words it leaves it up to the discretion of the court. And the vast majority of courts feel that, if the parent is not exercising his rights, there is no reason to terminate them. They prefer two parent families, so they want to leave it open for the father to change his mind about being in the child's life. Nor does it matter whether the father is willing or not.

But feel free to hire an attorney and pay him big bucks to argue the matter in court.

JudyKayTee · Jun 21, 2012, 11:17 AM

I'm coming into this late - what section of that law applies to your situation?

I will say I never understand the "I do not want his money" statement when it pertains to child support. I don't know why people who don't want or need the money don't pursue and accept it and then use the funds for the child's college education, a car when he/she reaches legal age, whatever it takes.

On the other hand if you are independently wealthy it's another story - although I still don't understand it.

JudyKayTee · Jun 21, 2012, 11:21 AM

Originally Posted by zraii

One thing I'd like to add - when we went into the divorce proceedings, we both asked the judge to terminate his rights. We both wanted this. The judge did not grant it because he felt that my ex would get off scott-free, without understanding the entire situation.

I know my ex would likely agree 4 years later to sign off, if it is somehow possible.

Thank you.

Now I'm confused - you and your "ex" BOTH asked the Judge to terminate his rights. That is the relief you BOTH requested.

The Judge did not grant it because he didn't understand the situation. What part didn't the Judge understand? Was that information then brought to the Judge's attention?

Here's my concern - the father won't sign for a passport and you think he'll sign a Petition.

I don't think it's going to happen. I see a lot of "could," not a lot of "will" on the site you posted.