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    london1983's Avatar
    london1983 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jun 8, 2012, 07:13 AM
    Girlfriend of 4 years lied & cheated, wants me back
    Hi,

    In a nutshell:

    1. Got together in my country England

    2. Spent 2 years together in England whilst I finished University and agreed to move to her hometown in France after. A rocky 2 years where she was abusive both physically and verbally, managing to fall out with most of my friends and family members.

    3. I left my hometown to be with her in her country (despite numerous warnings on this site and from friends and relatives). She refused to stay in my country and wanted to be with her friends/family/environment and I was willing to try it.

    4. Spent 2 years in her hometown in France living with her parents. I got along with them just fine and all her friends and family like me. Our relationship was OK, although I was homesick at times but still managed to start my own business and settle in somewhat. Basically she was doing her life and what she wanted and I was just there (thats what it felt like at times).

    5. She told me 4 months ago she needed time and space! I thought that it was a great idea and that I would come home to England and think about where my life was going there and go back with a new perspective on us, the same as I thought she would take a fresh look at us, all positive.

    6. HOW WRONG AND GULLIBLE WAS I LOL! She needed the time and space because she had met someone else (who worked in a DIY store) and from the day I left contacted this person everyday and slept with him and saw him for almost 2 months before telling me, the whole time keeping me hanging on in England thinking we were getting back together.

    7. During the "time and space" I sent 12 roses to her work place, visited her in France as a surprise only to be sent home the next day saying she needs more time and space, sent her hundreds of pounds worth of xmas presents only for her to say she wants nothing from me and make me cry on xmas day.

    8. After months of torture (no sleep, thinking, her stringing me on like it would be ok) and lies (saying she was at a girl friends, no replies to my txts/emails) she finished with me, saying some harsh things. 3 days later she gives me 100s of missed calls and texts saying it was a mistake.

    9. After a while I get back to her and agree to meet her to talk about things. She finally spills the beans and out of instinct I say I forgive her (dont think I do) and we come to an agreement to get back together but I come home and take my time. One day she says take your time, the next she says don't bother to come back. She even saw the guy again which I had to lie to get the truth from her about. She said it was to finish with him - yeah right, on a Friday night!

    10. So, this is where we are at, do I go back after what she has done to me or not?! I have started to settle back in at home and all my family and friends think it is crazy to even think about going back... but she is pleading with me and is very depressed about what she done and losing me.

    So, she is a liar for months, a cheater and has a history of doing bad things such as kicking me out in a country that I have nobody really to turn to with my luggage at 2am, physically attacking me, insulting my friends and family, doing what she wants regardless what I say or think, spoke in a sexual nature to another guy on messenger a year ago, loses her temper over nothing, etc, etc... BUT, I love her and could easily go back to her tomorrow.. WHY!

    GUYS reading this, trust me this is what happens when you are nice to someone and they take advantage of you, hence why good guys finish last. Could you forgive this betrayal?

    P.S. In 4 years I didn't even kiss another a girl.
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    Jun 8, 2012, 08:04 AM
    Reread your second to last paragraph! You need to write it down and tape it to a mirror so you can read it everyday. Why would you want to be a liar and cheater among everything else?

    You have it bad for this girl and your willing to satifice yourself your soul for her. This girl is not an ideal mate for you and if you give in to her you will be in the same boat in few months or year or years.

    Time to move on and let this girl go. You tried making this relationship work by giving up everything to go be by her side. And what did she do? Left you for a guy with no hestation. Sounds like a winner? No! You des er ve better and your going miss out on better if you go back to her.

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