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    dinkabell's Avatar
    dinkabell Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    May 14, 2012, 06:37 PM
    Why has my ex contacted me after ten months?
    I last saw my ex the day we left our flat, this was due to me finishing uni and we said we would move apart while I found work and saved, with the intention to move back in together. Well the last week we lived together I found he was sex texting some girl (an hour before my graduation) the relationship which was hard got worse and he was horrible but I was fighting to keep us together. Anyway, a lot happened and the day he dropped me off was the last time I ever saw him.

    He planned everything. So here I am, every few months I would get a nasty message then today, four months since he last contacted me he is asking for a second chance, even using pet names and telling me I still have feelings for him... (how kind. Lol).

    I never reply, he is very manipulative and I know this is another game. I guess I just wish I could understand, why he did what he did and why now? I know he was seeing other people and I know he has to be in control and before I would have jumped through hoops, I begged him to be with me and I told him once it’s over its over and I won’t go back. Don’t think he believed me. I was a shell. Now I’m better, he kind of scares me a bit... What do you think?
    bdaino's Avatar
    bdaino Posts: 32, Reputation: 5
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    May 14, 2012, 06:44 PM
    Be strong. Maybe tell him you want to meet him so you can speak to him face ot face about it... and then let him have it. Tell hi mwhat you think of him... tell him you know he is a manipulative person.. and that he's been a jerk to you. Let him know that you are strong and willing enough to move on without letting him mess you up any farther.
    Love takes time... and time showed you that he;s not the kind of person for you.
    ironhide262's Avatar
    ironhide262 Posts: 277, Reputation: 243
    Full Member
     
    #3

    May 14, 2012, 10:11 PM
    Block his number and any other way he might be able to contact you. Never talk to him again... just be happy your done with this manipulative person.
    Jimmy78's Avatar
    Jimmy78 Posts: 85, Reputation: 21
    Junior Member
     
    #4

    May 22, 2012, 12:24 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by ironhide262 View Post
    Block his number and any other way he might be able to contact you. Never talk to him again...just be happy your done with this manipulative person.
    So true
    ldd12's Avatar
    ldd12 Posts: 20, Reputation: 7
    New Member
     
    #5

    May 22, 2012, 06:23 AM
    I would not reply to his manipulative attempts. It can be hard when you wish you could understand something from the past (i.e. why he did what he did and why now?), but it's not worth it. Why dig up the past when you have done well so far without the answers. You've done great without him and have changed for the better. If he continues to try and contact you or if he scares you, I'd block his number (or retraining order if gets worse).
    mmresd's Avatar
    mmresd Posts: 2,002, Reputation: 553
    Ultra Member
     
    #6

    May 22, 2012, 10:50 AM
    Maybe he is bored, who knows?? And to be honest... who cares??

    An ex is an ex and you should remain no contact, ignore any request that an ex makes and continue living your life the way you were.
    WisperWill70's Avatar
    WisperWill70 Posts: 277, Reputation: 84
    Full Member
     
    #7

    May 22, 2012, 10:52 AM
    He doesn't believe in your strength because during your relationship you didn't show him that side of you. You say you "struggled to keep us together" (which hopefully in the future you will realise is impossible -- if you're working to save something chances are you're trying to hang on a relationship that isn't right for you or which is not in line with who you really are!)
    You begged him to be with you

    Why should this manipulative guy think that you have changed? Of course he might come back in and miss what you had but it sounds like he has issues that haven't changed. Don't respond -- ignore, delete, move on.

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