[Pedroalves]

Hi my name is pedro and first I like to say that my english is not perfect but I'm going to try my best. My wife and I are separated.  still living together With the kids which they don't suspect a thing, we still sleep together no sex  we coddle and hug each other but that's it.              
She tells me she don't love me anymore, a lot of things has happened  in the last year,  let me start by giving you a little history.   we meet in 1998 I was her first love and then I left her because her parents told me too, I was 20 she was turning 16 (you now what I mean) so I left her and yes I was in love with her and her parents took her away. So I didn't see her again, so she got involved with someone else, she had a baby boy, but she was in a abusive relation ship and so on.     3 years later I saw her in a club and I started to talk to her.  when it was time to go home we sad good bye.   Outside the club I see her walking away when I see a man Which was her boyfriend,  grab her by the hair and started  dragging her and hitting her.    the superman came out of me and I gave that man what he deserve and I took her and her son with me and it's bin ten years sense that happened.    And she was abel to start something new with me. 
    Her son my stepson has  ADHD  and his a loving kid that I love him dearly but I treat him differently from my own kids,  I'm more  tough with him,  his always doing things that just drives me crazy and I don't know how show him love.      2 weeks ago in school he had a melt down the he wanted to kill himself they call 911 and he was taken to the hospital.  he was seen by a  counselor and my stepson sad that my dad don't love me that  no body care about him only mom,    And I felt so heart broken but I still had my own problem to deal  with.     this is my problem .  
When I was 7 I was sexually molested by a man.   if I go to a public restroom and there is a kid there I run out the bathroom.  I don't hold, hug, kiss my nieces, nephews and no body's kids cause I can't,  and I don't watch or babysit anybody's kids,  i have a problem I know,I can't fix it but I have no problem with my own kids. I started to do more things with my stepson and I see that were getting along much Better.  
      We have had other problems in the past, I have cheated on her before we were married, we been married 8 years.  but in the last year we have done some crazy things like have 3somes  and so on.     she started to talk to an old friend like 8 month ago and I started to know something was different then she told me that there where just friends but she felt something for him and she told me that she did not love me anymore. I started to check this guy out and he had a girl and I took pictures and showed It to my wife and so that ended.   I was not giving my wife any attention and I did  A complete 360.  we got back together and thing were so much better Now this happened with my stepson and it's all over once again.
  I love my wife dearly and I just want us to be together again what can I do? Can you see a light a the end of the tunnel? It's it all over? What are my chances ? 

[screamlk]

Don't be ashamed to get either spiritual godly counseling,or public counseling from

The state your in.find someone you can confide in,and trust,or just pray about it

Every time you get a chance to be alone,I promise you god can change things

If you allow him to.forgive those people that didi you wrong,they were the one to

Have the problem,not you,and as far as your step son,lighten up on the child.

Apoligize,start over,understand what he is going through by not being treated

With respect.watch your step because sometime kids grow up and hurt their

Parents,so you want to raise a good person,not turn him into a monster

[joypulv]

How old is your stepson now? About 12? He's old enough for a heart to heart talk about your childhood, how you were molested and that made you fearful to be around children and to hug and be loving. Not because you would molest anyone but because you developed a fear that never went away. Tell him you have always loved him, and are truly sorry, and want to make up for lost time.
I think a lot of your marriage problems might be helped if you can gain some trust from your stepson. They can be put on the back burner for now. She may see what you are doing and love you for it.

[Pedroalves]

My son is terning 11 next month but to tell him My past I'm not sure yet he also have some mental delay he acts and thinks like a 7 year old and he wouldn't know anything about sex or things like that . But I have ben spending more time with him and things are getting better too with
Y step son. But my wife just told me today that she's done with me that she don't feel love for and to move on she also took her wedding ring off so I don't know what's going to happened now. Things are not looking right I don't know what else to do