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sam1114 · Apr 4, 2012, 09:01 PM

I’m 22 and recently got along with this friend of mine, meaning he was in my college but just as a class mate but from the time we started working together in the same work place we got too close to be called as best buddies ever, but he behaves very differently at times.

He always complains about his destiny and how badly it treated him in his life where as how easy my life was. He always tells his sad incidents to me on which I feel really bad for him so much that as if it was my life it happened, but when I share my stuff with him he doesn’t even give to it. He always makes fun of me in person and public I too take it playfully but if I do it sometime in a blue moon he gets offended. He also makes me feel guilty for what I am and what I do.

I just can’t understand does he acts like that to improve me by acting tuff or he really doesn’t care for me, but I really like him to an extent that I can put my life in forefront for my friendship, but he’s really complex. I can’t understand him I really love him as my best friend.

Please help me I’m really depressed thinking about this please

talaniman · Apr 5, 2012, 04:21 AM

He is who he is, and he sounds like a very negative sourpuss in need of an attitude adjustment. Just because you value his friendship is no excuse to expect to be joined at the hip forever, nor put all your eggs in his basket as your only best friend.

For now, until you do understand him and what he is going through, keep a safer emotional distance, and don't depend on him being the friend you want. He is NOT!

He has issues, we all do, but its wiser to have many other options for close friends than this flawed human, in need of maturing, and much growth. Don't latch on him as he is not as dependable as a friend as you are, nor forgive his bad behavior. Be cautious and wary of this, and stand for yourself.

You can't make change people he is who he is, you can only accept them for what they are, and where the are in life, and while you struggle to understand him, give him a wide enough space to grow yourself in your own way.

Do not let his behavior or attitude drag YOU down.