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    SneakyPete2012's Avatar
    SneakyPete2012 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Mar 11, 2012, 02:06 PM
    Long Distance Relationship Help.
    My girlfriend and I have been dating for over 5 years. In 2011 I moved across the country to attended a school while she stayed back home to finish her schooling and work. Before I moved(only a few months before) we had an issue with her "liking" some guy and she lied about a few things about that situation. I thought everything was okay when I moved across the country but when she came to visit me a few months later I read text messages on her phone only 4 days after I left that I did not like. She admitted that she was wrong and it would not happen again.

    So here we are now, she recently has become friends with a new co-worker. She plays online games with him late into the night as well as receiving text messages late at night(1-2am). When she tells me she is going out with her girl friend, this guy also happens to show up. I have asked her if has any feelings at all towards this guy and she told me, that she doesn't. She says that he is fun to talk to and that they have a lot in common, like music, movies and video games. She has only known this guy for about 3 months and she is already good friends with him.

    I feel like there is something more going on. I need advice on this situation and ideas on what I should do please.
    Silver Lining's Avatar
    Silver Lining Posts: 374, Reputation: 36
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    #2

    Mar 21, 2012, 07:16 AM
    I have been constantly told that long distance relationships never work,, u start doubting the other person, even though therez nothing going wrong.
    Based on what you have mentioned, I can't really say whether she is cheating on you or not, but you are losing your trust on her and that will just lead to more doubts.
    You either have to break up with her and move on, or you have to start trusting her. I suggest you talk to her,accompany her while she goes out to meet her friends, make friends with her co-worker... try to understand her. If then you feel she is cheating on you, then m sorry, its time to move on,,
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Mar 21, 2012, 09:26 AM
    You either trust her or you don't, and there is no point in being with someone you don't trust, whether you have evidence that scares you, or not. I mean is she never to have guy friends? That's the problem with LDR's, little things can get blown up to be bigger things. Or big things can look huge, when you aren't there.

    I just don't believe you have to tell someone how to conduct themselves when you are not there. I mean she has reassured you, so what is she supposed to do next? You have access to her phone and she hasn't hidden anything, so until this gets more involved, don't worry about what ifs. Don't over react.
    cara731's Avatar
    cara731 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Mar 29, 2012, 08:46 AM
    She only "admitted" to the first guy after you caught her which tells me she didn't care enough to be honest. Immature!! I have been there, understand the situation all too well. She is keeping you around maybe because she can travel to go see you and it's fun, she does have 'some' feelings for you but certainly does not love you if she was doing something wrong with the first guy and is hanging around with this new guy this often. Understable to have 'male' friends but if something happened in the past that hurt you, TRUST ME, walk away now. Your probably driving yourself nuts and not allowing for oppportunities to come your way holding on to her. This will not last forever, you'll see!

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