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    Tinkerbell4's Avatar
    Tinkerbell4 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Feb 15, 2007, 11:59 PM
    Can't orgasm from sex!
    No matter what I do or who I sleep with, I just can't orgasm from sex! I haven't had an emotional bad sexual experience and I'm comfortable with my boyfriend but it seems no matter what I do I just won't ever orgasm from sex. It is so frustrating because I have to fake it all the time. The only way I can orgasm is through oral sex or fingering which takes long. I hate that I can't orgasm with my boyfriend. Most of the times I never get to orgasm any time we have sex because he thinks I get to come when I have sex and once he comes from sex he doesn't want to go down on me. I've accepted it, but if there is a way I could orgasm from sex I would be so happy. And I've told my close friends and all of them look at me like "omg! you are missing out on so much!". I don't know anyone else who can't orgasm from sex. What should I do? :confused:
    dcarver's Avatar
    dcarver Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #2

    Feb 16, 2007, 08:29 AM
    The girls in my office discussed your dilemma... some say you are THINKING about it TOO MUCH and that may be causing subconscious anxiety creating inability to achieve the ONE THING that is SO important... others say your cervix may have a LONGER than normal curve causing your g-spot to be unreachable therefore the partner's penis NEVER REACHES the g-spot this can be confirmed by your gyn. GOOD LUCK
    automansgirl's Avatar
    automansgirl Posts: 467, Reputation: 42
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    #3

    Feb 16, 2007, 03:55 PM
    Many women will never orgasm during intercouse. Don't feel bad! First things first... DO NOT FAKE IT!! If you are faking orgasm you are allowing your partner to think that what he is doing is working for you, and it clearly is not. You need to be open and honest with him about what is going on so you can work on it together. Most men want you to tell them what to do because, believe it or not, getting you there can be more rewarding for them than actually getting there themselves. Try having sex in many different positions. Maybe start with missionary, go to rear entry, try standing, sitting on a counter, then end with yourself on top of him. This final position is the best position for women to reach orgasm. You can also stimulate your from this position the easiest. You may not be able to orgasm without extra stimulation, and if not, no big deal. I can't! Just remember to relax and enjoy yourself. I can't orgasm every time my husband and I have sex. Some women just can't. Your body changes constantly during the month, so you may be more capable of reaching orgasm during different times of the month than others. Regardless of whether you reach the big O during intercourse, always enjoy it, never fake it, and try lots of different positions. There has been research done showing that more women will orgasm when you change the positions during sex rather than staying in one position the entire time. Don't forget lots of foreplay before hand. Receiving oral before without reaching orgasm could help you to orgasm during sex! Always have fun with it, and be safe. Keep open communication with your partner and before you know it you will be telling all of your friends just how awsome it was!
    MandaGayl3xo6's Avatar
    MandaGayl3xo6 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Nov 26, 2007, 03:25 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Tinkerbell4
    No matter what I do or who I sleep with, I just can't orgasm from sex! I haven't had an emotional bad sexual experience and I'm comfortable with my boyfriend but it seems no matter what I do I just won't ever orgasm from sex. It is so frustrating because I have to fake it all the time. The only way I can orgasm is through oral sex or fingering which takes long. I hate that I can't orgasm with my boyfriend. Most of the times I never get to orgasm any time we have sex because he thinks I get to come when I have sex and once he comes from sex he doesn't want to go down on me. I've accepted it, but if there is a way I could orgasm from sex I would be so happy. And I've told my close friends and all of them look at me like "omg! you are missing out on so much!". I don't know anyone else who can't orgasm from sex. What should I do? :confused:

    Tinkerbell, believe it or not, I am the Same way except the faking it part. I want so badly to have an orgasm all my friends talk about how much I am missing out on and stuff it sucks. At first I was only having sex with "small" natured guys then my boyfriend now well is definitely well endowed so I thought that would do the trick but no... still nothing! =(.. I feel so horrible all the time because I can't get off. During oral & fingering, absolutely! Any clitoral stimulation gets me off very quickly but guys don't want to get you off that way they want to feel good about themselves and getting me off while having sex. My boyfriend kind of felt down after the first time we had sex it had been a month into the relationship and we wanted each other right then and there it was after a great date and lots of talking and getting along I wanted him and he wanted me but then we started messing around and NOTHING he got off 3times after 3 hours and still absolutely nothing from me. He said it almost felt like a failing to him that I was the first girl he couldn't get off. It made me feel horrible it feels like my body wants to, but then it just can't... I don't know, I just wish I could figure out what to do... Any tips?
    tylo's Avatar
    tylo Posts: 45, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Dec 2, 2007, 04:46 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by MandaGayl3xo6
    Tinkerbell, believe it or not, I am the EXACT same way except the faking it part. I want so badly to have an orgasm all my friends talk about how much I am missing out on and stuff it sucks. At first I was only having sex with "small" natured guys then my boyfriend now well is definitely well endowed so I thought that would do the trick but no... still nothing! =( .. I feel so horrible all the time because I can't get off. During oral & fingering, absolutely! Any clitoral stimulation gets me off very quickly but guys don't want to get you off that way they want to feel good about themselves and getting me off while having sex. My boyfriend kind of felt down after the first time we had sex it had been a month into the relationship and we wanted each other right then and there it was after a great date and lots of talking and getting along I wanted him and he wanted me but then we started messing around and NOTHING he got off 3times after 3 hours and still absolutely nothing from me. He said it almost felt like a failing to him that I was the first girl he couldn't get off. It made me feel horrible it feels like my body wants to, but then it just can't.... I don't know, I just wish I could figure out what to do... Any tips?
    DITTO!
    I have been with my boyfriend 8 yrs, I am comfortable with him, I have tried nearly everything, from relaxing, sextoys (which has turned out to be a no no,he doesn't like them being in the bedroom), roleplay, outdoor sex, indoor sex, candle lit rooms,fantasies... EVERYTHING.

    But now, we have just given up trying. He has now totally lost the wanting to try and even now, sex is just boring. Because I get so annoyed with myself, I have even given up trying to come cliterally. It takes so long now, that the two of us are just fed up. The more I try the worse it is.

    And the two of us are completely happy together,we enjoy each others company, we are still very much in love,so that's not a problem either.

    The advice everyone gives: relax, surely if it was as easy as that everyone would be having fantastic sex all day long and the population would boost ten-fold!

    Well that makes it even more worse, the more you try to relax, the more annoyed you get. Someone please give me something more physical to do.

    What's the best position? What's the best potions and lotions to use? Is there anyone out there who has started having orgasms after doing something?

    Someone tell me something that is tried and tested, not what some silly body language expert said on a programme about having sex after marriage!

    Thanks
    BrownGirl123's Avatar
    BrownGirl123 Posts: 18, Reputation: 0
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    #6

    Dec 2, 2007, 05:45 PM
    You don't realize how good you have it. At least the act itself feels good to you. Your only gripe is that you can't orgasm. All you have to do is find a good who won't put pressure on you about that and you'll be fine. Unlike me, I don't feel anything at all
    xXBeSiDeMeXx's Avatar
    xXBeSiDeMeXx Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Aug 6, 2012, 07:56 PM
    I have a similar problem. I can't come from sexual intercourse, even with clitoral stimulation. Though it feels amazing!! It's like I'm right on the edge, but can't cross it. I guess you could say I'm faking the actual coming part, but I'm loud when being pleasured anyway, so I'm already moaning, breathing heavy, and my body responds quite physically to everything done to me. So, it's just the actual coming part I can't seem to reach. Even with every single position tried... no big finale. But, I don't feel bad for faking it, because I get oral/fingering afterwards that gives me many orgasms I don't have to fake. So I guess... the way I see it... although it would be amazing to come during sex and not have to fake the last little part... I can't, so why let my partner down? It also turns me on more by pretending I have come. So, I guess there's that too. All in all, I'm in an amazing relationship, with someone Iove with all my heart, and he's amazing in bed. Why let my inability to reach orgasm during intercourse ruin the mood? I think the way things are at the moment are great, and I am more than fulfilled sexually. My sex life is the best it's ever been. So don't feel bad. I guess cause I'm already a loud person, it's not really completely dishonest of me, and I'm having an amazing time and am just as exhausted as if I had come... so to me, it's fine.

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