[jacogyrl]

I've been with my mate for 16 years off, and on. He has cheated in the past but I still forgave him, I haven't been so perfect myself. I really believes he loves me, and I love him as well, but sometimes I bring up the past.

I want to trust him, and I want him to trust me. We have kids together, and I also have two kids that are not his. We argue too much now. Do you think its time to call it quites now. Please help me with this question.

[jack dandy]

Do you still love him, if yes and he still loves you, it can be worked out its not easy but with counseling, and change of the way you treat each other.please let go of the past, it is just that the past look forward to your future, it will take quite a few years to regain his trust, but as a counseler told me once how many years has it been bad? It might take a while to make it right hang in there.

[talaniman]

Maybe it's a bad spell, or tough times, but you have to learn to curb your tongues, think before you act or speak, and not let emotions lead to bad behavior when you argue or disagree. Sometimes even older couples have to be reminded to step back and calm down. Especially during stressful times or situations.

When it gets to be too much, and it does from time to time, then just shut up, and let the emotional dust settle, and try talking during calmer times.

[lostsoul19]

I think you should go to some type of counseling to try to see if you can works things out especially in there are kids involved but your own happiness is important as well.

[mmresd]

Stop rubbing in his face his mistake, that is the time when you have actually forgave him, until then you are just keeping it as a secret weapon. Start rebuilding trust, by actually forgiving him if you wish to continue this relationship. If you can't, then end this relationship, because without trust there is no relationship to begin with.