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stephward · Jan 12, 2012, 01:48 PM

My daughters father isn't on the birth cirtficate and my husband lives in Florida and I was planning to move then he found out I was moving and decided after 16 months that he wanted to be in her life he never had any interest in her till now and I just want to know if I can leave the state before court. I am also expecting another child and want to be settled in Florida before the new baby comes?

kcomissiong · Jan 12, 2012, 01:59 PM

You are free to move, but it could detrimentally affect your case. You could be forced to return with your child, and if he has already filed, jurisdiction will remain in the original state unless he moves. You could also lose custody to him entirely if it appears that you are moving to hide your child, or to avoid his exercising his parental rights. You also had 16 months to rectify this by getting a custody order, and just like him, you did nothing. You really need to stay where you are until the case is concluded and custody/ visitation is decided.

stephward · Jan 12, 2012, 03:25 PM

I tried to get his rights removed and the lady I talked to about it told me after a year he couldn't do anything because he didn't do anything for his daughter in the past year so not like him I tried to do something but I'm seeing a double standard with the law here for women who raise there children alone then the father randomly wants to see there child.

Synnen · Jan 12, 2012, 04:10 PM

You did not take the time when he was NOT using his rights to have custody set up.

What you should do now is aggressively pursue child support. If the bio father really does not want to be around his child and just wants to punish you, he might be willing to relinquish his rights for your husband to adopt your child. If the bio father really DOES want to get to know his child and it took the threat of you leaving the state with her to wake him up---isn't that a GOOD thing? Isn't it GOOD that the father wants to be involved now instead of waiting until the child was 8 or 10 or 16?

ScottGem · Jan 12, 2012, 04:30 PM

First, did you give kcomissiong a negative (not helpful) rating? If so, can you explain why? Her answer was accurate and answered your question.It may have not been what you wanted to hear, but it was in line with the law in most states.

I have to agree with Synnen here. You left the father off the birth certificate deliberately. I have to wonder how much effort you made to involve the father in HIS daughter's life. And you have to remember she is his daughter.

If you move without court permission, the court will consider that contempt of court. How that affects your case I can't predict, but I would think it won't be favorable.

I also agree with Synnen that you should be going after him for support. That should show you how serious he is about wanting to be a father.