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tony2u99 · Jan 2, 2012, 03:24 AM

My wife expresses almost no interest in sex. Whave been married for 28 years. Sex has always been an issue. It used to be every few weeks or so. At present it has been over four months. I only seem to get "pity" sex - if we have an event we have to go to which she wants to enjoy (like a wedding, a cruise or an out of town convention -I try to take her with me). It seems she just has sex when she needs me in a good mood for a few days. The longer we go without sex the more irritated I get. If I bring it up she just ignores me or initiates a disagreement (in my opinion) which pretty much rules out sex. She says I don't make her orgasm. I have spent hundreds of dollars on vibrators, toys, creams, lubricants and the like. There is little or no kissing or intimacy when we have sex. Any kissing is generally on my part. I am an average guy just extremely frustrated.

Ddrodjr · Jan 2, 2012, 10:41 PM

I hear you try oral sex! Try finding thoese G spots! That's release that libido!

nitelight198073 · Jan 3, 2012, 04:11 PM

How old is she this may be a menopause or pre-menopause issue? I mean under no circumstance ask her about it.. it will start a fight, I am not making excuses for her, but try to see it from her aspect. Women have emotional issues caused by horomones , the horomones will cause her not to be in the mood. Also try priming her more, like the man says try oral, give her a massage etc...

tony2u99 · Jan 3, 2012, 07:28 PM

Thanks for the suggestions. My wife is 45. I have tried several times to locate the apparently mythical G spot. We even had some fun trying to find it together (man that was a long time ago). I think the menopause thing is a definite issue due to her irreglarity but my god, how long does this go on? It has been years. I have been faithful and patient but I am not sure how much more patience I have. I am only human! It just doesn't seem to be asking too much to ask my wife to have sex with me once a month. I mean if she is not always in the mood Christ she can just fake. Just think of it like taking out the garbage each week... you don't enjoy it or look forward to it but it needs to get done. Sorry... just venting. Thanks again for the advice I will give it another shot... as soon as I am permitted..

450donn · Jan 3, 2012, 08:40 PM

Maybe it is time both of you get a doctors appointment to discuss the problem. Maybe she is dry? Maybe she has low hormone levels? Maybe she has hangups with sex? Was she molested by someone? There are tons of possible reasons for the problem, and unless you get some professional help you will not ever discover what the problem is.

nitelight198073 · Jan 8, 2012, 06:41 AM

I am thirty one years old and my boyfriend and I don't have sex that much, and as for the comment about whether you like it or not you got to take the trash out... a woman's body does not have an off on switch, I know you are venting but that was kind of disrespectful to women. There are also ways of intimacy without sex maybe you don't give that to her enough? If she is not in the mood when you want it, slap in a porn and work one out for yourself... rant over -steps of the soapbox-