[MorganFreud]

I had a friendship group of three, my best guy friend, a friend or a friend who had become a friend of mine and I. The best guy friend I had known since I was three months old. He was always so awkward with social situations so he'd rely on me to help him out. We were really trusting of one another and alike brother and sister. I have like liked him for a long time, though whenever we talk about our feelings I feel sick and disgusted so we had never really gotten anyway. I knew that He liked me because he's confessed to me multiple times but because of my problem I could never return feelings until he didn't like me again.

The friend I met at another friends party and then again at her next party. Eventually we both wanted to meet each other, just the two of us and I learned a lot about her. She was a slut. She would make dirty jokes way too often for them to be funny, she had an internet boyfriend who lived up north. He and her would get together and have oral a lot. The surprising thing is that this girl is 13. She also claims she's bi. She lies all the time about having sex and skinny dipping so I knew she was safe. She was all talk.

Introduced my guy friend to her and we became a really close friendship group. Though every now and then I was bothered by the common "You didn't say your friend was cute!" from the girl. They both cracked dirty jokes 24/7. I always felt left out but I was determined to keep the group going for my guy friends sake of having more of a social life.

One time I organized for them to meet me at the shops but then discovered that I couldn't make it. I cried because my guy friend was already on the bus. Little did I know that they had both decided to meet up anyway after telling me that they were both going home.

Three weeks later I organized a movie with them oblivious to the fact that they had had sex weeks before. We went to the movies and it was a little awkward. I acted happy though because I hadn't seen them both in awhile. After a horrible movie I went back to my guy friends place and the other friend went to her own house. That was when he told me what happened after I was trying to get it out of him. I was so shocked that I had to excuse myself multiple times just to go to the bathroom and breath. I wasn't angry at the time, just shocked. I eventually started crying and demanding answers to questions. He started crying also, but I knew he was only upset because he regretted telling me.

Ever since then I have had performances, exams and all have been complete failures. The three nights after he told me I didn't sleep. I didn't eat a thing the two days following..

I was also angry that he didn't understand why I was so upset. I didn't want to tell him why, because that involved confessing my feelings. I finally did and he partly understood but I had to talk to him a lot to get the point across. Now we're closer than ever but the depression comes back whenever I learn a new piece of information like "She already had a condom in her bag". I cry every time I pass the place where they had sex. It was 3 months ago and I still cry at new details that he tells me like "I told my dad about me and ___ having sex and he said that I shouldn't tell you". He now loves me and always apologizes but now that I know he asked her to have sex rather than her asking him I never feel good around him.

Me and him always talk about it and when the girl found out my guy friend had told me she text him awful things about how he was a complete retard and that she lost me as a friend because of him.

I'm starting to think I'll never feel better because I'll never know ALL of the information. Last night I asked him to tell me all of the things I didn't know about it that he could think of and tell me so that I could get it out of the way...

I felt as if I wanted to kill myself. I feel a little bit better now but the sadness never clears completely.

[talaniman]

Sorry, but if your friend had guts and dignity he would/should tell you its none of your business. You are acting like a jilted girl friend, or mother hen, and how dare you make him feel bad because you can't handle it.

Stop the stupid interogations and mind your own business. Drop it, and just get over it.

[Aurora_Bell]

I agree, he had enough guts to tell you what had happened, and even showed remorse even though the two of you were not a couple. YOU decided to not tell him your feelings, my dear, he is not a mind reader! If you want to pursue a relationship with him, you ned to get over what they did in the PAST when you were NOT a couple and start fresh. If not, you need to end all ties and stop making this boy feel bad about something he did as a free agent. Although if he is 13 like the other girl, none of you should be having sex!