[anonomys]

My fiancŽ has been working for almost 4 months now.. Ever since then things have changed.. Obviously it takes two to tango so its from both sides.. But he used to be so romantic... I don't something has changed.. To get to my point.. He has a co worker at work she is 2 years older than him but they both get along very well and shares a lot with her also they formed a strong bond since they come from the same backround.. He has introduced me to her once.. She gives him advice and so does he.. She recently broke up with her boyfriend and he's been really broken up about it so he was there to comfort her.. He's a really sweet guy but girls don't uderstand he's just being sweet.. He can actually be too nice sometimes.. Which is what made me fall head over heals for him.. Ever since her break up then they have become closer she once sent him a joking message after hours of work and he showed it to me.. Should I be worried? What do I do? He keeps saying that I'm being jealouse and crazy that she's older blah blah blah

[bladepolisher]

The real question you not be wanting to ask, and may very well be prolonging the problem as well as allowing it to develop, is do you trust him? You need to confront this problem now before he builds too strong of a bond with this girl. Tell him how you feel and really probe his responses to your questions later after your talk. Is he aware of the affect this is having on you, is he setting boundaries with this women and if not, is he aware that this women is very vulnerable right now and very apt to use him as a distraction?? Approach him as though you were more concerned for him (as you probably are) and explain that your not coming from a place of jealousy, but you are concerned that certain actions or lack of actions on his part are causing some concerns for you.

Don't dawdle over him. If he decides to go the dummy route, accept that now as a possible eventuality and start thinking of how to protect your emotional interests. Either way, get the answers and let him know that what you share with him is eternal and that this women is temporal... at best. Stay true to yourself!

[joypulv]

This happened to me.. sweet innocent husband 'helping' a co-worker. He fell in love with her, left me, turned out she was using him, he came back to me, I couldn't handle my old resentment, we broke up for good.

This just happened to a cousin, also with a sweet hapless husband.

Not to say it is true everywhere. I'm sure there are equal numbers of cases where it will never turn romantic.

But 2 years older is an older woman? Who's zoomin who?

[bladepolisher]

People put more effort in to inspecting new clothes before buying them then they do seeing who they're marrying. When there new marriage starts showing holes in the fabric soon after the walk down the aisle, they act all dumbfounded. Do not give freely of your prescious self unless your mate cares enough to work for it. If they can't do this, than they weren't the right one to begine with and everything after this revelation is a waste of time. Remember, we can't reset the clock, so be wise the first time. Ever heard the old saying that the best way to find what's yours is to stop searching for it? Don't be so picky or caught up in a cute smile because there's always someone else who also thinks that smile is cute and eventually the smile that answers back is going to be younger and cuter than you. Go for the heart.