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Anonymous4321 · Sep 30, 2011, 01:16 PM

I'm 25 and my boyfriend of two and a half years is 30. We've been officially living together for 5 months now and for the past year or so we have only been having sex maybe 2-3times a month, if even. He says he still is very attracted to me and that part of it is that he doesn't like how he looks. I've tried everything and nothing even gets a reaction from him. He's lost his interest in porn and admits that he's only masturbated once in three months or so. I know this isn't normal since we used to have sex 3 times a day when we first started going out. He smokes a lot of pot and as done two steroid cycles this year already. This is potentially the main problem. I'm worried about my relationship. He won't kiss or hug me randomly the way he used to either.

DragonRider11 · Sep 30, 2011, 02:18 PM

Uh... it's safest to either get married or break up. Ever think about AIDS? Plus, if he smokes pot and stuff, there's a chance you could get a life-threatening disease.

solidintel0157 · Sep 30, 2011, 04:02 PM

Hmm... I understand how you feel at this moment with your relationship. Of course it's natural for you to feel that way, when your loved one suddenly cuts off all romance and others related to that. But have you thought about getting him checked up at a medical institution? Because it's best to know what's the problem so things won't get worse. It must be drugs and other substances he may be using that affects his erection stages. First off, here's an article on smoking pot. This may help a bit: http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn17671-regular-marijuana-usage-robs-men-of-sexual-highs.html

Also, it is very important that both people are equally satisfied in a relationship. If the unhappiness or doubt continues, it is healthier to end a relationship, even if it may be hard... And at times, frequent sex may cause erections to be less frequent. Some men find themselves less erectile when they masturbate too much or engage in sex often. So your boyfriend's case may be just a natural, harmless thing, but bottom line is, GET HIM CHECKED UP. IT'S BETTER TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP AND MIND THAN A DYSFUNCTIONAL RELATIONSHIP DUE TO PROBLEMS THAT CAN BE FIXED BUT NO ACTIONS WERE TAKEN. Wishing you all the best in this...

talaniman · Oct 1, 2011, 12:56 PM

He has some unhealthy habits he needs to deal with, and until they are resolved, this whole relationship will be confused and unhealthy for you both.

Talk to him about getting healthy again so you can enjoy your time together and not build worry, and resentment, and uncertainty.

If he is in denial, or unwilling to be helped, or get help, you leave, or be drowned in his sh*t with him.

vanheart · Oct 2, 2011, 03:56 PM

Imagine a guy with no unhealthy habits. Cool with you & the way he looks.
Doesn't need drugs.

Totally devoted to you. And your relationship together.

Is that him?

I would give him a chance to rectify, If not, then he may not be right for you.
Sounds like his habits were going on way before you.