[BreatheTaylor]

So, I have a couple problems. One of them is that I like two boys at once. That isn't really the important one. Another is that I thought I liked them both equally -- turns out I was wrong. You know the old saying "distance makes the heart grow fonder", right? Well, I spent more time with one boy than the other, and the distance and lack of time spent between me and the other boy ended with me liking him much more. That isn't the biggest problem though. To make this easier to explain, we'll use fake names; The boy I've been spending more time with is going to be named James, the boy who I like much more (who by the way, I've liked him much longer than "James") will be called Tyler, and "Tyler"'s girlfriend gets a unique name -- Skank... By the way, I'm in grade nine, going into grade ten. Tyler, James and Skank are all grade ten going into grade eleven.

So as the story goes, I met Tyler back when I was in grade seven. We became friends, I developed feelings for him which no one knew about and then we lost contact. I met James in grade eight, we had a thing for a while, even dated for a bit last summer which didn't turn out. Either way I still had feelings for both of these people through out all of grade nine, I just never shared them with anyone. I didn't really see either of them for most of the school year, but around final exams reconnected with both of them... James and I practically act like a couple - and we probably already would be, but I promised myself I wasn't going to date again at least until school started because I know there will be new people - and Tyler and I were on a friends basis. But there was tension between Tyler and I. Sexual, romantic, etc. Everyone could tell we had feelings for each other, and so eventually I decided to confront him about that. I told him that despite my almost-relationship with James, and how long we'd spent apart I had feelings for him - but I didn't want to hurt James. Tyler told me he liked me too, and went on about how much alike we were and how he couldn't help but be happy around me. But I told him again that I couldn't hurt James, and he said he understood. The feelings grew more and more between Tyler and I, and I actually ended up kissing him the last time we hung out before he went to his Mums house, and then to Ontario.

The week he was at his Mums, he started dating his ex-girlfriend again (Skank). It was literally three weeks ago that he was *****ing about her to me, saying how she ruined his life, got him beaten up three times, and ****ed his best friend a week after their break up. Now they're back together. So, I posted on his wall while he was in Ontario (not knowing he had family on his Facebook suggesting that he and I hang out and partake in some less than legal activities ( ;) ), and Skank commented saying "Hahahahaha! In your dreams." Well, I'm rather competitive, so without thinking I replied "Oh..? Note to self; it seems Tyler has an owner..." To make a long story short, Skank and I endd up having a huge argument (and yes, I destroyed her) about how controlling she was and that I had every right to hang out with Tyler considering he's been my friend for a long time.

Everyone that read the argument thought that Tyler would be mad at both of us, but probably agree with me. Turns out everyone was wrong. He responded and *****ed at me for saying what I said on his wall because he had family on his Facebook, and called me a gossippy grade nine *****, and just raged basically. Then turned around and thanked Skank for "looking out for him". So I called him and left a message, and inboxed him on Facebook appologizing for posting that on his wall and I deleted the post so hopefully more of his family wouldn't see. Again, everyone thought things would work out between Tyler and I, and they were wrong. Things have really ****ed up between us, and I don't know how to fix them.

I'm not even sad about this to be honest, I'm just hurt. I don't think I've ever felt so abandoned. He told me that he didn't want any sluts getting between him and Skank, called me desperate and clingy etc...

That's my biggest problem. Is that I don't think I can fix this, and I'm terrified. I really like him and value our friendship, and he thinks I'm a total piece of ****.

A lot of people have already said "Oh, just be with James then." but it isn't that easy. I don't have as strong of feelings for James. Not to mention, I don't want to be with him when all I can think about is someone else (Tyler). That isn't fair to James.

What do I do..

[liz28]

Why Tyler girlfriend have to be a spank, because she have what you want? It is oblivious that Tyler likes her because they are together so you need to leave him and her alone. Stay off their relationship and realize this guy can't be with you because he is already involve with someone else. You two already kissed, which is wrong, and some might consider you the skanks for that action and him a cheaters because of his actions. Quit while your ahead and stay away with. Sometimes we can't control who we like but we can control our actions.

Now as far as you and James goes, if you don't like him then be honest with him. Even though the two of you are friends but doing couple things don't get the two confused. And don't do things to make things complicated. If the two of you are going be friends and nothing more make sure you express that to James so he doesn't expect more so he won't get himself crushed.

Your in high school and I remember those days. I recalled liking someone but I didn't act in them because I was shy or they were already involved with someone. But hey you can't always have what you want. So, enjoy your high school years because you can't never have then back and don't put yourself in a situation that can escalate into a whole bunch of uncalled for problems.

[BreatheTaylor]

"Skank" is named "Skank" because she is one. Tyler and her weren't dating when we kissed, so he didn't cheat. I know there's nothing I can do about him and I having a relationship or not, but he hates me now -- I'm not asking what to do to separate him and Skank, I'm asking what to do to fix things between us so maybe when Skank eff's up for the third time and causes him to break up with her, I might have a small chance rather than no chance at all.

I do like James, a lot. But it's just difficult because I like Tyler so much more and now he's completely disregarding my existence...

Thanks for the advice though :) Muchly appreciated.

[talaniman]

Leave Tyler alone, he has his hands full with Skank, and messes with you when she is pissed at him, or whatever. Not good, and she probably told him to stay away from you. Girls are like that when they no some chick is putting the moves on her man. So leave it alone.

And if James ain't the one you should be honest with him. And until you get off Tyler's trail, then you won't like anyone else any way.

Your aren't screwed, you are stuck on someone you can't have.

[adviceishere]

Harshness warning!

His girlfriend or skank as you call her, had every right to say what she said to you on his Facebook wall. Your calling her a skank when you have no idea who she even is, plus she never done anything to you. You just don't like her because she has what you want and your whole post just screams "JEALOUSY".

Your way to focused on boys, be on your own, you don't need a boys attention just to feel wanted and happy, seriously. If you keep going on like this and acting as a threat to other peoples boyfriends, you will end up with a lot of enemies. Posting that on his wall was, point blank, looking for trouble!