[kay20]

I am 16 years old and I am tired of living at home. I get into fights with my dad (who is very good at psychological abuse) and whenever this happens, I am forced to my room for days on end. Usually the only thing I come out for is to go to school. Recently, my boyfriend (who is older than I am) were talking about me getting emancipated. He is working and said that he would make me a bank account and put money in it so that I have proof of income, and he also said that I can move in with him. So we were wondering how hard it would be for me to get emancipated. I go to school everyday, and I have average grades, and after this school year is over, I will have a job. My mom lives with my dad, but she just goes along with everything he says, so she doesn't get yelled at. Can anyone help me?

[excon]

Hello kay:

From a legal perspective, I don't think you can do it, because you don't have the money to hire a lawyer, and you're not going to get it done without one.

Second; EVERY kid has fights with their parents at 16. Psychological abuse is in the mind of the beholder. He's not diddling you. He doesn't beat you, and he puts dinner on the table every night.

Third; we're only talking about two years here. I know. At 16, two years is a lifetime. I'm 63. Two years is last week.

excon

PS> By the way, after you've moved out, and as you get older, you'll find out your parents got smarter too...

[mzdebb]

There is more to emancipation than meets the eye, and it may differ state by state. The usual guidelines generally speaking are:
1. Is it supported by your parents?
2. Are you self supporting? Meaning; Do you have a job now and does that job pay enough for you to afford living on your own? (Rent, utilities, food, transportation, school supplies, clothing and medical care.)
3. Are you mature enough to maintain a job, stay in school and live on your own without assistance from family and friends?
4. Is emancipation in your best interest in the eyes of the judge?
5. Additionally, you have to have a certain amount of money in savings before you can even consider going to the court and filing for emancipation. This is required by the court. Plus it will cost you to file for emancipation.
So first off you have to get a job. Secondly that job has to pay you enough to save money and your job has to continually supply you with enough money to live off. At your age you will more than likely find a job that pays minimum wage. No one can live off minimum wage. While working you also have to go to school and you have to maintain a passing grade in all subjects. You cannot quit school since that is against the law, so you will have to work and go to school. You will have to find a good paying job that will work around your school schedule.
All of this has to be accomplished before you file for emancipation for a specific time before the court will even consider your request.
There are many adults who are unable to do what you want to do without an additional income coming into the home. So sometimes it’s just better to get thankful for the free food, free doctor visits, a warm bed and the roof over your head than to try to do that on your own at such a young age. Good luck!
Oh one more thing 18 will come sooner than you think. After that you can face these challenges for the rest of your life. Have fun, enjoy your freedom, and smile a lot. Once it's over... it's over.

[miss k]

Hello kay:

From a legal perspective, I don't think you can do it, because you don't have the money to hire a lawyer, and you're not gonna get it done without one.

Second; EVERY kid has fights with their parents at 16. Psychological abuse is in the mind of the beholder. He's not diddling you. He doesn't beat you, and he puts dinner on the table every night.

Third; we're only talking about two years here. I know. At 16, two years is a lifetime. I'm 63. Two years is last week.

excon

PS> By the way, after you've moved out, and as you get older, you'll find out your parents got smarter too.....

I just have one comment to make about your response, excon. Emotional abuse can be worse than physical abuse and have a lifetime effect. Her situation is exactly what my situation was (I am 34 now). My father did everything he could to tear me down, and my mom just sat and watched because she was afraid of my dad. I wish I could turn to a site like this back in those days. By the way, my father used to physically abuse me too but I would have rather he just beat me than tear me down emotionally and make me feel like I was an absolute zero to this world. If anything shouldn't a child rely on the love of their parents?

If the emancipation doesn't work out sweetie, just remember this: after you turn 18 get far far away from BOTH your parents and simply refuse to let that poison back into your life. Rebuild from there.

[excon]

Hello miss k:

Thank you for your interest. I understand that you're viewing her question through your experiences. Plus, I don't disagree with your assessment about emotional abuse - at least the kind you had.

However, I refer you to the part where I said, emotional abuse is in the eye of the beholder. I don't know whether this girl thinks her parents are abusive because they don't want her out past 10:00 PM, or whether they treat her like you've been treated.

If I erred, I chose to err on the side of reason. MOST kids at her age think their parents are emotionally abusive. Most kids grow out of it. Unless informed otherwise, I think that's what's going on.

excon

[Fr_Chuck]

Call it a idea, but does the grounding and yelling have to do with the boy friend who is "alittle" older. And what a child sees are abuse is a great father and parent.

But as stated you will need a job, not a boyfriend giving you money. You will have to provide the courts proof of that income ( check stubs and the such)
And you will have to prove you can pay ( against not boyfriend) rent, electric, food and still go to school.

And in most you have to show a reason for it, proof of the abuse and why you need to be released from your parents

[miss k]

Hello miss k:

Thank you for your interest. I understand that you're viewing her question through your experiences. Plus, I don't disagree with your assessment about emotional abuse - at least the kind you had.

However, I refer you to the part where I said, emotional abuse is in the eye of the beholder. I don't know whether this girl thinks her parents are abusive because they don't want her out past 10:00 PM, or whether they treat her like you've been treated.

If I erred, I chose to err on the side of reason. MOST kids at her age think their parents are emotionally abusive. Most kids grow out of it. Unless informed otherwise, I think that's what's going on.

excon

I understand what you mean.

[christina12345]

I am in the same situation i never get along with my parents and sometimes i do. in january i moved out to live with my boyfriend it only lasted a week. but i just ranaway again on march 31st and made it even worse by skipping school andf running away the same day but i sat down with my parents and talked to them and i have been getting along with them great and we all agreed to the emancipation so just try talking to them you never know it might work and if it doesnt you need to start saving alot of money and start working on finding someone to move in with:rolleyes:



-Christina Anderson,15

[gissel]

I am having the same problems just with my mom and I was wondering what I can do about this?

[JudyKayTee]

Do you want to be emancipated? Is that the question?

The rule of thumb (depending on your State and age is): able to support yourself and have proof you do/have; your OWN PLACE to live (not with friends or relatives); at least minimal education so you are employable. Some States require that you actually be employed.