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PinoyBoyy · May 25, 2011, 10:27 PM

So my ex and I started to go out again. She wanted to hide our relationship though. I agreed thinking it will only be hidden for a few days. It lasted 2 months. I talked to her about this because it lasted for so long. I found out she was hiding our relationship from her ex, being complete strangers in school, but a couple at home. On our anniversary, she was with her ex the entire day. I became so pissed and told her "Thanks for a great anniversary." She broke up with me right after. The next day, she apologized and wanted to get back together. I told her we need time to ourselves because the breakup was uncalled for. She agreed and said "I love you. I want you and only you, no one else."
Her parents love me and always want me around. They invite me everywhere that they go to. They want my ex and I to get back together. They hate their daughter's ex who I mentioned earlier. They want her to stay away from him and are willing to place a restraing order on him if he doesn't keep away. Her parents give her everything she wants as long as she is away from her ex.
Days have gone by since the breakup and I find her with her ex during lunch. I don't have the opportunity to be with her besides lunch and she spends it with her ex. I talked to her about it, but she ignores me. She ignores my existence in school. When I complained, she told me, "Leave me alone, I'm not doing anything wrong. **** off." Weeks have gone by and it becomes worse. I now see her and her ex with each other before school, between classes, lunch, and after school. I'm left there to watch her ex put his arm around her. She doesn't make time for me anymore, but makes time for her ex.
She texts me everyday and I always respond, but lately since she's always with her ex, I ignore her calls and texts. Like she told me, "**** off." So I ignore her how she ignores me and go enjoy my day. She starts complaining to her and my friends saying "He's not answering to me anymore. It's making me mad. He makes me feel like crap always ignoring me making me look dumb in front of everyone." I don't understand. She wants me to stop talking to her or she'll get mad.but when I do, she becomes mad because I did. What do I do in this situation? Am I at fault?

thadevilsadvocate · May 25, 2011, 11:57 PM

Don't make her a priority and let her make you an option. This is clearly the situation and you don't need to waste anymore of your time. You have already started ignoring her, so stick with No Contact and leave it as it is. If she can't see where she is wrong, then there is really no chance in this even improving, until she can come to her senses. There are plenty of ladies in the world that would love to be given the time of day, and would in return give you the time of day... spend all your effort on a lady that cares as much about you as you do about her, instead of wasting it on her.

amicon · May 26, 2011, 04:32 AM

Leave the drama behind and stick to NC.

Devorameira · May 26, 2011, 06:40 AM

You're right to ignore her. She's just been dragging both you and the ex along.

Time to go complete No Contact and move on with your life.

PinoyBoyy · May 26, 2011, 08:14 AM

No contact meaning delete her number, Facebook, etc. until she realizes what she is doing wrong?

amicon · May 26, 2011, 08:27 AM

No,you do all those things so that you can clear your head from the confusion and heal from the drama of the breakup.

PinoyBoyy · May 26, 2011, 09:42 AM

So basically get her out of my life huh?

amicon · May 26, 2011, 10:28 AM

Basically,yes.

88sunflower · May 26, 2011, 11:47 AM

Your both in school so leave her to her school games. That is just drama that you don't need. If she wanted you then you would not be a secret. Sounds like she can't decide who she wants. That or she is stringing you along in case he breaks up with her she can fall back on you. Who cares if her parents like you. Don't be her fall back guy. Show her your better then that and find a girl who wants to show you off to the world openly.

talaniman · May 26, 2011, 12:50 PM

Yes its your fault you have allowed yourself to be used by a female with her own agenda, to provide a smoke screen to her parents so she can be with the ex that they hate.

She is who she is but the bigger question is who are you that allows this kind of behavior to be done to them?

Get some dignity and self respect, and have nothing more to do with this female, or her games, ever again. For that matter, have nothing to do with people like her ever in life. Ignore them completely.

88sunflower · May 26, 2011, 12:57 PM

I just am wondering now is she seeing her ex while her parents are thinking she is actually seeing you? Is she using you as some cover up? I mean she keeps you around after school. But in school she is with her ex. Hmm...

I wish · May 26, 2011, 01:06 PM

Actions speak louder than words. It's obvious that you are not her priority. You keep referring to the other guy as her ex, but I see him more as the real boyfriend and you're the backup plan. She keeps you lingering around just enough, so that it keeps her parents off her back just enough.

How can you be with someone when you're not her priority? That doesn't seem fair to you. The part that is your fault is that you allow yourself to be in this position.

If you go into no contact thinking that she will come around to you one day, then you're setting yourself up for disappointment.

Check out this no contact thread to understanding the meaning of no contact: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...nc-510419.html

amicon · May 26, 2011, 01:09 PM

Originally Posted by talaniman

Yes its your fault you have allowed yourself to be used by a female with her own agenda, to provide a smoke screen to her parents so she can be with the ex that they hate.

She is who she is but the bigger question is who are you that allows this kind of behavior to be done to them?

Get some dignity and self respect, and have nothing more to do with this female, or her games, ever again. For that matter, have nothing to do with people like her ever in life. Ignore them completely.

Yes!

PinoyBoyy · May 26, 2011, 08:46 PM

I'm also thinking that I was used now that you all mention. I need to get over this girl fast before I get hurt me. What would you guys suggest to get over her? Never been in a situation like this so I have no clue what to do.

talaniman · May 26, 2011, 09:28 PM

Read the stickies on the relationship home page.

I wish · May 27, 2011, 10:29 AM

Originally Posted by PinoyBoyy

I'm also thinking that I was used now that you all mention. I need to get over this girl fast before I get hurt me. What would you guys suggest to get over her? Never been in a situation like this so I have no clue what to do.

Read this: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...nc-510419.html

88sunflower · May 27, 2011, 02:00 PM

As hard as this is for you keep your head held high and be strong. When she realizes your distancing yourself from her she may possibly be back in full force. Don't fall for it. You are now in control of you. You look the other way and find another focus.