[luvsick01]

My boyfriend of 5 years, which is also my two-year-old sons dad left two weeks ago. The thing is he left without saying anything to me, but I feel so guilty. The day before that I told him, "I don't give a sh**; I can do it by myself and I don't need you. I was just so frustrated because we had been arguing for like 7 months about a female friend of mine he doesn't like and all because we had a problem with her brother, which she had nothing to do with it.

But he said he had a bad vibe about the family and he didn't want me around her, but I thought he was just doing it to control me. Now I see that he did it to protect our family and basically it seems like I picked a friend over my family. I know he loves me very much because he always showed it and I love him very much too!

Since he left I have not seen or spoke to him, but the good thing is my brother knows where he lives and still has contact with him. I don't know if I should give him time to be alone or if I should go look for him and apologize? Or what do I say? Please help I really miss him!

[JudyKayTee]

My boyfriend of 5 years, which is also my two-year-old sons dad left two weeks ago. The thing is he left without saying anything to me, but I feel so guilty. The day before that I told him I told him "I dont give a sh**; i can do it by myself and I dont need you. I was just so frustrated because we had been arguing for like 7 months about a female friend of mine he doesnt like and all because we had a problem with her brother, which she had nothing to do with it. But he said he had a bad vibe about the family and he didnt want me around her, but I thought he was just doing it to control me. Now I see that he did it to protect our family and basically it seems like I picked a friend over my family. I know he loves me very much because he always showed it and I love him very much too! Since he left I have not seen or spoke to him, but the good thing is my brother knows where he lives and still has contact with him. I dont know if I should give him time to be alone or if I should go look for him and apologize? Or what do I say? please help I really miss him!

You told him in very exact words that you no longer care for him. He believed you. He presumably knows where you are if he wants to have contact with you. Is he providing support for his son or attempting to see his son?

You argued for 7 months about your friendship with someone he doesn't like? It looks like you won that argument.

If you contact him you say what you've said here - you're sorry, you miss him, you realize he was trying to protect your family. I personally would give him some more time and space because, as I said, he knows where to find you if he wants to come back.

If he does come back I think the two of you should speak to a counsellor - 7 months is a very long time to keep an argument going, particularly when the unsolved issue caused him to walk out on you and his son.

[talaniman]

Its one thing to know you were wrong, its another to actually apologize. I think that's where you start, by apologizing. Maybe he accepts it, maybe he won't.

[jmjoseph]

You need to open up communication with him. And by that I mean tell him what you've told us here. Apologize for being hateful ( yes, it was a hateful thing to say), and see where things go. For the sake of your family, go talk to him.