[joypulv]

Your story is not unlike thousands of others. You just have to hope that your earlier years with him will carry him through to a later understanding. The pregnancy probably caused much confusion in him that he couldn't go to you about. Failure is another topic that teens worry about. They look at their parents all snug and secure and successful and don't realize that it took years to get that way.

I broke off contact with my parents after high school because I dropped out of a very good college and ruined a full scholarship. Their expectations of me were extremely high. I couldn't handle the course load (coming from a small rural high school), plus I was miserable for other reasons, and felt that I was pretty much disowned, whether it was true or not. The disappointment was palpable. My mother was not a happy person herself and I felt that I was supposed to solve that somehow, and of course couldn't.

[sadmom9]

I did text my son and asked him. "Why are you not responding to our texts when we were communicating a few months ago?" He said it was still because we didn't invite his aunts to my daughter's graduation. I replied "Her graduation was a year ago and we were communicating a few months ago? We didn't invite them because your sister didn't want them there. They had not been a part of her life for over two years and never called her when she was in the hospital, not once did they ever call to ask how she was feeling or what happened or thought about calling to say hello knowing this family matter affected her too. They ignored her, should I have ignored your sister's feelings too? I also reminded him of all the years of disrespect and verbal abuse I tolerated from his aunts, but I ignored them because they were my husbands sisters and wouldn't disrespect them. I reminded him how he never wanted to go over to their homes because he hated how they treated me. He didn't respond... Finally I just got a response that he didn't want to be contacted and would contact us when he was ready.

[sadmom9]

He was just being very difficult, drinking and driving, finding a drug pipe in his room. I would ask him to throw out the trash and he would just tell me f@*& no! I am also disabled and look to my husband and kids to help with the simple chores in the house. I always kept a super clean and organized home and still do. My other main concern was, as a parent, I wanted to set an example to my daughter who was 15 at the time that we would not tolerate that kind of behavior. I know people have made remarks about my daughter, but when I said I was proud of her, I meant the accomplishments that she has obtained. She is playing volleyball for a Division I college and is nationally recognized considering the injuries she endured and the pain from physical therapy and never giving up... She's following her dreams and just finished her first year. I couldn't be prouder.

[JudyKayTee]

Now I'm confused - your daughter is playing volleyball in College but earlier you said, "Our daughter is not in college and he has no relationship with her."

This is why parents should call the Police when they find drugs in the house and the child is drinking/driving.

Perhaps your son is tired of the same argument which appears to have been going on for over two years. It would appear that he is not interested in your explanation.

Are you posting under two names or do I have you confused with someone else?

[sadmom9]

Our daughter was 15 1/2 at the time this happened. She started college at 17 years old and is 18 now. They still don't have a relationship. No, I have not posted under another name. "Not" should have been "now"

My reason for wanting my son to hear my explanation is because he had never heard it. I was hoping if he heard my explanation, it would open his eyes and understand where I was coming from. I think it did because I did get an "ok" at one point. He knew I was right in the sense that he always felt his aunts treated me horribly and yet I put up with it and he couldn't understand why. He had never given us the opportunity to talk to him so he never knew why we made the decision we did. When we were communicating late last year he asked me several questions about our actions which I answered but it had nothing to do with the graduation or his sister. Just that we asked him to move out because of his behavior in being disrespectful and hurtful.

[sadmom9]

I know its confusing, it was long ago & in those few months our lives were turned upside down. The day I found the pipe (it was just the pipe no addtiional drugs were found) we were upset... fuming. We were waiting for him to come home and when he did we realized he had been drinking and driving that particular night. It was about 12:30-1:00am when he came home. I asked him for the keys of the car several times and he refused to give them to me, I reached for them and that's when he tried to hit me. That's when I told him, if you don't give me the keys and you drive the car, I would report it stolen. He was one month shy of being 19 years old. It was hard because we were so close, he met this girl and she was preganat in 2-3 months and I found out after I had told her mother I didn't want her in my house without adults being home, I found out they would wait around the corner in the mornings waiting for me to leave to work and the mother would drop her off. Who does that?