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    confused2012's Avatar
    confused2012 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Mar 26, 2011, 04:15 PM
    I'm a girl, and had sex with my gay male best friend.
    Well, here's the story about us. We're both in high school. He claims he's gay, he's been with girls before but it was years ago.We've been friends for about 6 months, and in those few months we have became extremley close. He's going through a hard time with his family & a bunch of other problems, and I've helped him get through a lot of it. We see each other almost every day. We tell each other seriously everything. EVERYONE says we act just like a couple.

    I've found myself getting strong feelings for him but never really told him.Everyone says its obvious that we both do, but I don't know. He's always talking about men and I do get extremely jealous, and it seems like if I talk about me and anyone else he gets jealous also. We sometimes stay the night together, and do nothing more than just cuddle all night. But, last night my friends parents were out of town and we all stayed there. Her boyfriend, me and my friend. We drank a little bit, not much. And we all started openly talking about sex, and he said he has always had a sexual attraction to me, and that I was the only girl he'd ever do anything with.and all of a sudden he just made out with me... and later that night we took it further, as in all the way. It was honeslty the best I have EVER had & he said he really enjoyed it too. And was really happy that he pleasured me so much.

    Now it's the next morning and we've all gone home, and he's been acting different. We usually text all the time, I haven't heard from him much and when I did he was being *****y, but that's not anything new. He said this was not going to change our friendship at all, and I hope it doesn't. He honeslty is my other half, and I would be so extremely lost without him. I don't know if he has romantic feelings for me like I do with him, but I'm willing to put those aside because I'd rather have him as my best friend than nothing at all. I just feel so depressed right now, and I don't know what to do. I guess I'm just asking other peoples opinion on this, and try to help?
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
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    #2

    Mar 26, 2011, 05:09 PM

    Due to posting restrictions on the Adult Sexuality board (and since you are still in high school), how old are you?
    confused2012's Avatar
    confused2012 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Mar 26, 2011, 10:25 PM
    18
    confused2012's Avatar
    confused2012 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Mar 27, 2011, 07:55 AM
    Comment on Cat1864's post
    We're both 18.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #5

    Mar 27, 2011, 11:29 AM

    I don't think he's gay. I think he's bisexual.

    Does that change anything in your thinking?

    (I trust you are practicing safe sex.)
    confused2012's Avatar
    confused2012 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Mar 27, 2011, 12:18 PM
    Comment on JudyKayTee's post
    Of course.
    And yeah, I mean our friends knew we did it & they were like your bisexual. And he kept saying he felt straight in that moment, but felt like a hypocrite for being that way. I don't know what to do. :/
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #7

    Mar 27, 2011, 01:44 PM

    I must be missing something. Your friends know you had intercourse with this person?

    I must be missing something - you don't know what to do about what? You can pick up the friendship where it was, continue to have sex with this person, drop the friendship.
    confused2012's Avatar
    confused2012 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Mar 27, 2011, 02:04 PM
    Comment on JudyKayTee's post
    Well, only the two people there know.
    And I don't just want to drop the friendship... I love him way too much! He said that night we could be sex friends too, but we haven't talked about it since it happened & things seem weird. Like he used to text me and call me constantly, and now not so much. I mean the whole thing was his idea for the most part.. and now I feel like he might think it was a mistake.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #9

    Mar 27, 2011, 04:34 PM

    I agree with you - and I think you are endangering your health if you continue to be his "sex buddy" when he is having sex with other people, men OR women.

    Maybe he's embarrassed. Maybe he's not that much into you.

    Ask him - he's your friend.

    Maybe he's embarrassed that other people know... and are talking about him.

    Again, ask him.
    confused2012's Avatar
    confused2012 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Mar 27, 2011, 05:14 PM
    Comment on JudyKayTee's post
    Well we did use protection, without a doubt.
    And after all the things he said, I don't see why he wouldn't be into me, he said he really liked it. But I think he's just confused. The only thing I said to him was I don't want things to be akward, and he said "Then don't talk about it". But then he makes jokes, Like I said he was sore and he's like oh I wonder why... I swear he's so confusing. But, thanks.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
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    #11

    Mar 27, 2011, 09:22 PM

    This is why sex buddies is the stupidest thing in the world to do.

    You can't TALK about sex with this person. Why would you even THINK about HAVING sex with him? Yeah, yeah, the horse is out and it's too late to close the barn door.

    But seriously--go back to being friends, don't have sex with this person any more, and get your head on straight about what you want in a relationship.

    PS--remember that even with birth control, sex = babies. If you don't want to be stuck with a guy you can't communicate with for the rest of your life, DO NOT HAVE SEX WITH HIM AGAIN.
    confused2012's Avatar
    confused2012 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #12

    Mar 27, 2011, 09:38 PM
    Comment on Synnen's post
    He's just hard to say no too, espeically because I feel like I've got stronger feelings for him than a friend. But I'll keep this into consideration, thank you.

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