[frustrated401]

My husband and I have been married for almost 5 years, and I'm just not sure if we should really be together. We have never been intimate in the 5 years we have been together, and when I bring it up with him, he just apologizes and says that it's his fault and he will do better, but still nothing happens. I would feel better if there was a reason he didn't want to be intimate, but I never hear anything from him.

We argue about everything, and I feel as though I have no support from him. When we were married, he was in grad school and I sacrificed everything to help him out so he didn't feel stressed about needing to do things at home. I'm now in grad school, and have asked for his help so that I can focus on school and work. He doesn't help at all, and so I'm now balancing taking care of our home, working 50 hours a week and going to school, while he sits at home watching TV and going to bed early because he's always tired. I feel like I sacrifice a lot for his happiness, giving up friends and the social life I would want to have, and he makes no efforts to meet my needs.

He also has some anger issues, and I've asked him to get some counseling. He has, but I haven't seen any difference. He's also admitted that he doesn't have the time or the energy to really make it work, which to me feels like it's not worth it if he isn't putting full effort into it. I've offered to go with him, but he is too embarrassed to have me go with him.

I'm getting to the end of my rope and am thinking about leaving as it seems like it would be easier for me to be on my own, but maybe I'm wrong and should stick it out. He knows about all of my concerns and doesn't make any efforts to change, and hasn't asked for anything from me, and basically has stated that it's all him. I feel like I've been the only one fighting to stay in this relationship, and I'm tired of being the only one who cares. I want him to make an effort, but I'm not sure how else to communicate that to him. What should I do? Do I stay, should we separate for a little while, or is it time to just call it quits?

[martinizing2]

You have never been intimate in 5 years?

He doesn't work , is no support, has anger issues and is not trying to make anything better.

Why are you still there?
A relationship is a partnership that he seems to have missed.

I don't see any question. Go.

[Aprilshowers44]

Tell him either it's marriage counseling or a divorce. You will burn yourself out trying to take care of everything yourself. He needs to grow up or let you go.

[Devorameira]

If the situation is as bad as it reads, then I'd definitely be giving him to ultimatum of marriage counseling or divorce.

Marriage should be a partnership, but seems like you certainly don't have a partner in him!