Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    loop89's Avatar
    loop89 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Mar 4, 2011, 09:15 AM
    My boyfriend doesn't want to have sex with me?
    I was with my partner for five years and he cheated on me with my best friend just over a year ago. We split up and he got with her but said that he really wanted to try again with me. Only a couple of months ago we said that we would try and work at it and see how things went.
    Recently though he has had an obsession with the way I look. He has told me while drunk that I don't put enough effort in to looking good for him, that he could do so much better than me and that I need to lose weight. Hes also said things while sober like you could put more effort in etc etc. But then he says he does like the way I look he's just trying to make me healthy? But its getting to the point he tells me off for eating the wrong things and doesn't like me eating anything unhealthy. Ive ended up comfort eating while he's not around. I know Im not skinny, but Im not obese. I lost two stone in the few months we wernt together and I felt so much better about myself till he started having a go.

    Hes recently started not having sex with me as often. Its started becoming once a week or something. But he said one of the problems to why he cheated on me was because I didn't have sex enough, he wanted it everyday. Since we got back together I have wanted to but he says he's not up for it, and he doesn't know why. He says he thinks he's feeling guilty for what he done. But only a month ago he wanted it all the time! He reckons he has times where he thinks that he doesn't deserve me for what he did and other times when he doesn't think about it. Yet he is always going on about having a threesome and it feels like if there was someone else with us hed want sex.

    Im starting to think its because he's not attracted to me deep down, and that is why he won't have sex, because he cant. I have woken up on more than one occasion to him masturbating while Im asleep so its not like he's not ever in the mood, its just seems like he doesn't want to do anythng with me?
    I don't know what to think anymore. I feel really miserable and have really low self esteem. I know he doesn't love me but he says he cares for me more than anyone and doesn't know what hed do without me, but why would he want to make me feel so unattractive if he cared so much? :(
    jenniepepsi's Avatar
    jenniepepsi Posts: 4,042, Reputation: 533
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    Mar 4, 2011, 09:37 AM

    How old are you hon?
    loop89's Avatar
    loop89 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #3

    Mar 4, 2011, 09:38 AM
    21 and he's 23
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
    Expert
     
    #4

    Mar 4, 2011, 10:04 AM

    Want to know the BEST way you can lose weight and feel better about yourself in this situation?

    Get rid of his dead weight from your life.

    A guy that cheats on you and makes derrogatory comments about your body isn't worth ANYTHING.
    southamerica's Avatar
    southamerica Posts: 667, Reputation: 400
    Senior Member
     
    #5

    Mar 4, 2011, 10:11 AM

    There's nothing I can say to add to what synnen put so concisely. YOU are fine just the way you are, and this loser is holding you down. Drop him like he's hot (and I don't mean attractive)
    jenniepepsi's Avatar
    jenniepepsi Posts: 4,042, Reputation: 533
    Ultra Member
     
    #6

    Mar 4, 2011, 10:51 AM

    He is a piece of crap and you don't need him. Tell him tokiss your a$$ and go away.

    You deserve someone better than him honey. Don't ever let anyone tell you different
    simoneaugie's Avatar
    simoneaugie Posts: 2,490, Reputation: 438
    Ultra Member
     
    #7

    Mar 6, 2011, 12:09 AM
    People become more of themselves as they get older. Picture yourself with him in 20 years.

    His put-downs and controlling behavior is a sickness he has. He is not better, more healthy, blah, blah than You. He is insecure and lording over you is his way of hiding it from himself. He is not being honest with himself or with you.

    So, get honest with yourself. You deserve better than him!
    Sunshine2020's Avatar
    Sunshine2020 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #8

    Mar 6, 2011, 01:04 PM
    He seems to be very manipulative towards you. You know in your heart that he is not good for you. There is a guy out there that would love you for who you are. I dated so many losers that treated me that way and I thought I would never find someone who would love me unconditionally, then I met my husband. He loves me for me, no matter if I gain 10 pounds or feel like wearing no make-up that day. Your prince charming is out there, but you can't find him while you are with the toad.
    adviceishere's Avatar
    adviceishere Posts: 1,027, Reputation: 492
    Ultra Member
     
    #9

    Mar 6, 2011, 01:17 PM

    Look at yourself and how low you feel now, if you stay with this poor excuse of a man he will chip away at your confidence day by day and eventually you WILL think you need him, you don't need him, you don't need anyone except yourself, and the sooner you become your own best friend and enjoy being you, the sooner you will begin to feel happy in yourself and what better way than to start shedding the weight of this tumor that's sucking the life out of you.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

What does it mean when your boyfriend doesn't want sex from you [ 20 Answers ]

Hi I'm 19 years old nearly 20 my boyfriend is 25, I'm always in the mood for sex when wer in bed with each other, I try an touch him but he just pushes me away. And rolls the other way he always makes excuses when I ask him for sex, he doesn't touch me when I touch him he says he doesn't feel like...

My boyfriend doesn't want to have sex with me [ 25 Answers ]

I have a boyfriend and we've been going out for 3 months now.. and we never had sex, he more much like doing oral sex instead of having sex with me, and make me tired doing oral sex.. please give me some advice Gail

Boyfriend says he doesn't like sex. [ 5 Answers ]

Hi, me and my boyfriend have been together for 6 months. Im 21 and he's 24, he was a virgin. When we first got together he wanted me to touch him, and we had sex almost everyday for about a week. Then he moved me in with him ( and he asked me to move in with him) After I moved in with him we didn't...

My boyfriend doesn't want to have sex with me [ 6 Answers ]

I've been with my boyfriend now for 3 months and we have only had sex 4 times. The last 3 times however he has pre ejaculated which has left him very embarresed and apologetic. I reassured him that its OK and I don't mind, I'm here for him no matter what however he is still embarresed. Since the...


View more questions Search