[Ladybllossom]

I asked my mom and dad if I could move in with my grandparents, just to get away from here. My mom told my dad to ask, since it was his parents, and said that she just wanted me to be happy. Later, she said that she wasn't going to do it because it would be trouble to her. I appreciate that I have both of my parents and a place to live, but I hate this small town and my parents are unhappy together and my dad brought up the D word and was so upset he started crying because he wasn't sure I knew how much he loved me. I would talk to someone else, but the only other adult I trust would try to make me stay. My mom treats me worse than all my other siblings and is always yelling and cussing at me, and no she isn't abusive, but it is annoying and stressful and when I ask her to stop or try to talk to her she starts yelling at me again. We were gone for a week on vacation and I had a lot of make-up work, and that same Monday we had to put my dog to sleep, and on top of that my mom was yelling at me even more. I have had enough, and am ready to leave but am not prepared. I do not plan to leave a suicide note or kill myself, just get away from this house. I probably sound like all the other teenagers in the world, but I'm serious. I am trying to leave with a plan and a companion, no not my boyfriend, just until someone realizes that I am a human who deserves the same amount of respect as anyone else. I believe that I should be judged on character and what I say, rather than how I look or how I word what I am saying. I hope you all will help me and not tell me I am a stupid, naïve 13 year old. Thank you.

[joypulv]

I'm sure half the entire world sympathizes, but here's the problem: there's no where to go that will be any better for you, as you describe your life. You have a roof over your head and no one is hitting you, drunk and abusive, cheating on the other, or being criminal. Just being - well, awful, isn't worth the mean streets of running away. I went through the same thing, and I even had a neighbor offer to take me in, but I didn't go. Why? I'm not sure, but it think it had to do partly with the huge uproar it would cause, and also that I was already miserable and didn't think I could perk up in the other family.

You need to get rid of the idea that people elsewhere are going to respect you and judge you as you are and so on. It's a pretty iffy world out there, and you won't know who is helping you and who is about to take advantage of you. And a 13 year old girl? Prey. Even 13 year old boys are prey.

Your parents aren't getting along, I take it, and this is tough on you, and your mother is mean partly because of her marriage problems spilling into your life. Try to study and have a best friend and learn a skill. You need that skill for when you DO leave, the day you finish high school. Get an after school job and ask the boss to teach you extra on your free time, whether it's keeping books, inventory, car mechanics, pet care, anything. In the summers learn life saving and CPR and any other short courses you can find.

[Fr_Chuck]

If I though you would not be harmed or killed, I wish you could run away and find out how hard and how hateful the world can be if you have no job, no income. I guess you could work the streets selling sex and drugs, that is where most 13 year olds end up in the bigger cities. That is of course unless the gangs don't get you first.
There are people who just hang around bus depo in the larger cities looking for kids like you to "help"

[asking]

You do not sound at all stupid or naïve. It's sounds like your life is really hard right now. You have a right to want to find ways to make it easier. Your mother should not be yelling at you so much and your father should not be crying and confiding in you about his misery. They are supposed to be the adults and they are not behaving well. All that said, it's hard to know what kind of options you have.

Have you talked to your grandparents directly? If you trust them enough to live with them, you should be able to confide in them and tell you what's on your mind. You don't have to dump all over your parents. Just tell the grandparents that it's a really stressful time, you aren't getting along with your parents and could you come and stay with them for a few months? It might be temporary. If they agreed, they would probably talk to your parents for you. Would you have to change schools? How far away do they live?

At the very least, I think they will feel obligated to at least keep in touch with you and provide some emotional support, which you clearly need and deserve.

I am really sorry about the dog, too. Sounds like a really rough time.